This transcript was automatically generated and might contain errors.

[0:00] Brad Forenza: If you could be anything in the world, what would it be and why?

[0:06] Brad Forenza: This is Brad Forenza, series creator of Around the Sun.

[0:10] Brad Forenza: This very special episode, as it were, is called Red Light.

[0:14] Brad Forenza: It stars Dolores Catania and David LaRosa.

[0:17] Brad Forenza: After listening, we hope you'll join our conversation via the hashtag Around the Sun Podcast.

[0:40] David LaRosa: A neon vacancy sign blinks through the window of a dingy motel room as the actuary loosens his tie.

[0:47] Dolores Catania: So, have you always been a whore?

[0:54] David LaRosa: Yeah.

[0:55] Dolores Catania: Like, always, always?

[0:57] David LaRosa: Uh-huh.

[0:59] Dolores Catania: What about occupational health and safety? You never got to clap or anything?

[1:04] David LaRosa: In the realm of things, I've always been a whore.

[1:06] Dolores Catania: Good. Continuity's good.

[1:09] David LaRosa: Have you always been an actuary?

[1:10] Dolores Catania: I like routine.

[1:12] David LaRosa: Unbutton your shirt.

[1:14] Dolores Catania: Did you know that the American worker changes jobs an average of 12 times in their career?

[1:21] David LaRosa: So, in a way, you and me are outliers for staying the course.

[1:26] Dolores Catania: Kindred spirits, some might say.

[1:28] David LaRosa: Great. Put your shoes by the door.

[1:31] Dolores Catania: Of course, I really wanted to be a pilot.

[1:34] David LaRosa: Bend your belt.

[1:35] Dolores Catania: The freedom, the open air.

[1:38] David LaRosa: Deep inside, I've always been a transcendentalist.

[1:41] Dolores Catania: Like Thoreau?

[1:42] David LaRosa: My parents.

[1:44] David LaRosa: They're the ones that wanted me to be an actuary.

[1:46] Dolores Catania: Safety in numbers, they said.

[1:48] David LaRosa: Thanks, Mom and Dad, right?

[1:51] Dolores Catania: Right.

[1:52] David LaRosa: So, here I am in town for this convention when all of a sudden I remember Myron from back home telling me if I was ever in the city, I should call you for a good time.

[2:03] Dolores Catania: Milwaukee Myron or Miami?

[2:06] David LaRosa: Milwaukee.

[2:07] Dolores Catania: But now that I'm here, I think I have scabies.

[2:10] David LaRosa: You're fine.

[2:11] Dolores Catania: I don't know how you can do this every day.

[2:13] David LaRosa: I'm separate from the work.

[2:16] Dolores Catania: My doctor thought this would be good for me.

[2:19] David LaRosa: Now I'm not so sure.

[2:20] Dolores Catania: Look, pal, it's your hour.

[2:22] David LaRosa: Fine. That's fine.

[2:24] Dolores Catania: But you should know that I don't kiss strangers.

[2:28] David LaRosa: Hold your horses! We haven't even started yet!

[2:33] Dolores Catania: Look, if you don't want to kiss, how do you want to start things?

[2:36] David LaRosa: I think I'd like to get to know you first.

[2:38] Dolores Catania: Oh, for serious?

[2:39] David LaRosa: I mean, can we talk more?

[2:40] Dolores Catania: Fine, but I'm not stopping the clock.

[2:42] David LaRosa: Well, Myron said you were a professional.

[2:44] Dolores Catania: I am. You pay for my time. I deliver a service. What's unprofessional?

[2:49] David LaRosa: Well, I think it's important to know someone before being intimate with them.

[2:52] Dolores Catania: Hey, a warm body's a warm body, pal. Remember, I'm separate from the work.

[2:58] David LaRosa: But it's more than work.

[3:00] Dolores Catania: Yeah, we think it is.

[3:02] David LaRosa: It's something that can't be defined.

[3:04] Dolores Catania: The wide-eyed bucks, the hyperactive brokers, the leathery old men.

[3:08] David LaRosa: All proteins and water. It's just different vessels.

[3:11] Dolores Catania: I'm not here just to be physical.

[3:13] David LaRosa: Oh, God. Of course you're not.

[3:15] Dolores Catania: You're here for the convention to talk about financial planning or whatever else actuaries do.

[3:21] David LaRosa: I'm just an afterthought. Or is it the other way around?

[3:24] Dolores Catania: Both are equally important to me.

[3:26] David LaRosa: Take your pick. Throw the bowl for 60 minutes or get in and get out like everybody else.

[3:31] Dolores Catania: Either way, you'll leave just as empty.

[3:33] David LaRosa: That's not possible.

[3:34] Dolores Catania: It is, though.

[3:36] David LaRosa: Anonymous sex is like a good book.

[3:37] Dolores Catania: Engaging, stimulating, but ultimately ephemeral.

[3:43] David LaRosa: Well, that's what I'm trying to get past.

[3:45] Dolores Catania: The transience of it all.

[3:47] David LaRosa: Then find someone back at home to connect with.

[3:50] Dolores Catania: But no one knows me there.

[3:51] David LaRosa: All they want to talk about is when they're going to die.

[3:53] Dolores Catania: It's very one-sided.

[3:55] David LaRosa: So how could I, a nice whore from the city, know you better in 60 minutes than any of your friends back in Miami?

[4:01] Dolores Catania: Milwaukee.

[4:02] David LaRosa: Milwaukee.

[4:03] Dolores Catania: I passed through there one time. It wasn't... it wasn't the worst.

[4:09] David LaRosa: Maybe you'll come back sometime.

[4:11] Dolores Catania: Don't hold your breath.

[4:12] David LaRosa: I'm still working.

[4:16] Dolores Catania: So, uh, you like Thoreau?

[4:21] David LaRosa: I like classics.

[4:23] Dolores Catania: What's your favorite?

[4:24] David LaRosa: The Clock is Ticking.

[4:25] Dolores Catania: All right, look, fine. I just, I never would have guessed that a professional woman like yourself would like the classics, that's all.

[4:30] David LaRosa: Why not?

[4:35] Dolores Catania: That's all I'm saying.

[4:36] David LaRosa: Why? Only actuaries can appreciate nice things?

[4:38] Dolores Catania: No.

[4:39] David LaRosa: Listen, there are professional women all over this country in all shapes and sizes.

[4:43] Dolores Catania: Witches, too, I hear.

[4:45] David LaRosa: Oh, really? You could be a witch.

[4:47] Dolores Catania: No, I'm an actuary.

[4:49] David LaRosa: Whores, witches, outcasts, we're all over the world.

[4:52] Dolores Catania: You just can't see us.

[4:54] David LaRosa: But I want to.

[4:55] Dolores Catania: You don't, though. Not really.

[4:57] David LaRosa: Because if you saw us, you'd never see things the same again.

[5:04] Dolores Catania: Look, what are we doing here?

[5:05] David LaRosa: He needs the room.

[5:06] Dolores Catania: Well, I want to know you, all right? I want to connect.

[5:09] David LaRosa: If you knew anything, you'd know I have a job to do and I myself am separate from the work.

[5:14] Dolores Catania: Well, I don't want to compartmentalize.

[5:18] David LaRosa: Protect your heart. Keep the work separate.

[5:21] Dolores Catania: Well, in my next life, I want everything integrated.

[5:24] David LaRosa: I want to fly planes. I want to live off the land.

[5:27] Dolores Catania: And I'm going to work off the grid.

[5:29] David LaRosa: You only get one life.

[5:30] Dolores Catania: What if we come back?

[5:31] David LaRosa: Let's just do this and get out of here.

[5:34] Dolores Catania: What would you come back as?

[5:35] David LaRosa: I don't have time.

[5:37] Dolores Catania: He's going to be mad.

[5:39] David LaRosa: Come on.

[5:39] Dolores Catania: I mean, what would you want to be?

[5:42] David LaRosa: Come on, talk to me.

[5:43] Dolores Catania: You want to be a writer?

[5:45] David LaRosa: No, a whore.

[5:47] Dolores Catania: Why?

[5:48] David LaRosa: Because that's what I'm destined to be.

[5:51] Dolores Catania: That's what my aptitude test says.

[5:53] David LaRosa: It's written in the stars.

[5:55] Dolores Catania: Thanks, mom and dad, right?

[5:57] David LaRosa: Right.

[5:58] Dolores Catania: But aren't we supposed to evolve more and more each time?

[6:05] David LaRosa: So we're not doomed to repeat the same futile existence over and over again.

[6:11] Dolores Catania: There's no way out. Trust me.

[6:14] David LaRosa: I've tried.

[6:18] Dolores Catania: There's no way out.

[6:19] David LaRosa: Well, I guess we've talked long enough.

[6:24] Dolores Catania: I guess.

[6:26] David LaRosa: I don't want to get you in trouble.

[6:28] Dolores Catania: It wouldn't be the first time.

[6:30] David LaRosa: I really thought I was ready for this.

[6:33] Dolores Catania: I really thought I was ready to connect.

[6:36] David LaRosa: Timing.

[6:37] Dolores Catania: Timing.

[6:39] David LaRosa: If I leave now, I can get back for the plenary session.

[6:42] Dolores Catania: Forecasting risk and perpetuity.

[6:45] David LaRosa: You could come if you want.

[6:48] Dolores Catania: Yeah, I could.

[6:50] David LaRosa: But he needs me.

[6:52] Dolores Catania: Remember, you're separate from the work.

[6:54] David LaRosa: Yeah, that's what I tell myself.

[6:57] Dolores Catania: Before I go, can I give you a kiss?

[7:02] David LaRosa: I thought you didn't kiss strangers.

[7:05] Dolores Catania: Well, I don't. But you're not a stranger anymore.

[7:09] Dolores Catania: For a moment, they share a sweet, tender kiss.

[7:17] David LaRosa: Wow.

[7:18] Dolores Catania: Was it good for you?

[7:21] David LaRosa: It was good for me.

[7:22] Dolores Catania: Was it good for you?

[7:25] David LaRosa: The best.

[7:28] Dolores Catania: Now, enjoy the plenary and have a nice life.

[7:33] David LaRosa: You too.

[7:34] Dolores Catania: I'll leave your money on the dresser.

[7:36] Brad Forenza: Around the Sun is written and directed by Brad Forenza, co-produced by Suzanne Ortiz-Curry and Brian Daschu, with sound design by Brandon Alexander Villarreal, conceptual art by Jean Epiphan, graphic design by Melanie Hibbert, and theme music by Shane Currie.

[7:49] Brad Forenza: If you enjoyed this episode, please like, share, and subscribe, and continue the conversation by using the hashtag AroundTheSunPodcast.

[7:56] Brad Forenza: Thank you for watching Around the Sun.