This transcript was automatically generated and might contain errors.

[0:00] Laura Benanti: This episode contains topics that some listeners may find triggering.

[0:03] Laura Benanti: See the episode description for more information. Listener discretion is advised.

[0:09] Laura Benanti: I'm Laura Benanti, and you're listening to me on Mamas Talkin' Loud.

[0:13] Cara Cooper: Hi, everybody, and welcome to the first episode of Mamas Talkin' Loud. I'm Cara Cooper.

[0:17] Jessica Rush: And I'm Jessica Rush. And we are starting off with our friend, Tony Award winning actress, Laura Benanti, getting down to the truth of motherhood and all things mental health and social media and jugglin' it all.

[0:31] ♪ Musical number: "Mamas Talkin' Loud" — performed by Unknown artist ♪

[0:39] Jessica Rush: Hey, there. You're listening to Mamas Talkin' Loud. I'm Jessica Rush.

[1:01] Cara Cooper: And I'm Cara Cooper.

[1:02] Cara Cooper: And today, we have our friend, Laura Benanti.

[1:07] Laura Benanti: Hi.

[1:08] Jessica Rush: Hi. Good morning.

[1:09] Laura Benanti: Good morning.

[1:10] Laura Benanti: Post school drop off.

[1:12] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[1:12] Cara Cooper: Mamas Talkin' Loud podcast. That's where we're at.

[1:16] Jessica Rush: You might know Ms. Benanti, Tony Award winning Laura Benanti from any number of Broadway shows.

[1:23] Cara Cooper: Back, way back with her debut in Sound of Music at the ripe old age of...

[1:29] Laura Benanti: 18.

[1:30] Cara Cooper: 18.

[1:31] Laura Benanti: 18.

[1:31] Cara Cooper: A hundred years ago.

[1:32] Jessica Rush: Dreams. And all the way up through most recently would be, not She Loves Me.

[1:37] Laura Benanti: My Fair Lady.

[1:38] Jessica Rush: My Fair Lady, right. Oh, my God. Beautiful. Dream role for you.

[1:42] Laura Benanti: Yeah, totally.

[1:43] Jessica Rush: Yeah. Laura is here to talk with us. She has a daughter, Ella. You want to tell us a little about Ella?

[1:48] Laura Benanti: Ella is two and a half going on 45.

[1:52] Laura Benanti: She is like a tiny old woman who has started to say things to me like, you don't talk to me like that. So that's been a fun transition.

[2:05] Laura Benanti: But she's also just like super empathetic and kind and funny.

[2:10] Laura Benanti: She actually performed on stage at Sopac with me and my mom. But yeah, we sang Doe a Deer.

[2:16] Jessica Rush: I saw that video on your Instagram.

[2:18] Laura Benanti: And it was magical. I told her, I was like, listen, you're going to come see mommy and Nana on stage. Do you think you'll be able to be quiet in the audience? And she was like, yes, I want to sing. And I was like, oh, okay. And I was like, do you want to sing with me and Nana? And she was like, no. She was like, I want to sing by myself with a big microphone.

[2:41] Laura Benanti: And I was like, okay, got it. So then she decided she did want to sing with us. She wanted to sing Doe a Deer. And they gave her a little tiny microphone, like one of the smaller ones that you would use for a guitar or whatever. And she marched right out on stage, not nervous at all. And then she wanted me to pick her up. And then the minute the music started, she was like, put me down. And I got this moment. It was unbelievable. And then she bowed and confidently walked off stage. And my friend and our music director, Todd Almond, was like, that was the definition of taking the stage. She walked on there so confidently. So now she's hooked and I'm screwed.

[3:19] Jessica Rush: Exactly. I saw that there was a picture of her with this wistful look on her face or something. It was like a look of love.

[3:25] Laura Benanti: Yes, exactly. This is where I'm meant to be.

[3:29] Laura Benanti: Yes. The minute she looked out into the audience, she was like, oh, you like me. You really like me. She found her audience.

[3:33] Laura Benanti: So our friend Chelsea, because I've been fretting a little bit, because I take her everywhere. And I was like, maybe I shouldn't. Maybe she just thinks life is just like the Colbert show and being at the theater and sets and stuff.

[3:50] Laura Benanti: And so Chelsea got her a microscope. And the very first thing she put under it was a picture of herself. And I was like, well, that's done. Yep. I think we know what you're going to do.

[4:01] Jessica Rush: So much for that.

[4:01] Laura Benanti: Oh my God. She reminds me so much of your daughter.

[4:05] Cara Cooper: Oh, of Elliot?

[4:06] Laura Benanti: Yes.

[4:06] Cara Cooper: Yeah, I know. She reminds me so much of Elliot. Just precocious and sassy.

[4:12] Laura Benanti: Super sassy.

[4:12] Laura Benanti: Yes. She has all kinds of... The other day, Elliot said she went to dance class and they turned on the lights. And I said, oh, they turn the lights on for your final little performance, the last 10 minutes? She goes, yes. I said, and how does it make you feel? She goes, like a star.

[4:27] Laura Benanti: Oh, no. So there's that.

[4:31] Cara Cooper: All right.

[4:31] Cara Cooper: Yeah. Well, speaking with Ella, about Ella and when she was born, that was quite a journey and you weren't... Well, you were working when you were pregnant.

[4:46] Laura Benanti: I worked my entire pregnancy up until a month before I was due.

[4:51] Jessica Rush: You are a rock star. That's incredible.

[4:53] Laura Benanti: So I was pregnant with her during She Loves Me for the first three months. And I had hyperemesis. So I was just barfing constantly. It was horrible. It was so bad. My dressing room was just completely pitch black. And then I would have to get my eyes adjusted to the light before I would go on stage. But every performance, I just looked like a person about to vomit.

[5:14] Cara Cooper: Because you were, wow, she's really nervous. Amalia is very intense.

[5:21] Laura Benanti: So I did that. And then I did a TV show called The Detour, where they were kind enough to write my pregnancy in, which was awesome. And then I did a brand new show at the Carlyle, which you and Chelsea came to. And then I was, I mean, I was shooting The Detour all through my pregnancy up until I was like humongous to the point where the following season I was still pregnant. But they were like, we can't make you look as pregnant as you looked. He was like, your nose was pregnant.

[5:48] Jessica Rush: Oh yeah. Mine changed too.

[5:56] Laura Benanti: Oh my gosh.

[5:56] Laura Benanti: Exactly. Just flat and wide. Horrible.

[6:04] Laura Benanti: Oh my God. So yeah. So hyperemesis, crazy pregnancy, and then just the worst labor, you guys. It was, I went into labor on February 11th and I had a baby on February 14th. Yep.

[6:10] Laura Benanti: Which whenever I tell people that they're like, oh, cause it's Valentine's day. Like you missed that part where I was in labor for three days.

[6:14] Laura Benanti: It's also my dad's birthday. So that is really amazing. But I labored at home for like 40 hours and then I finally turned to my doula and I was like, I need drugs. Cause I was in, I didn't realize that I was in back labor. She was sunny side up. And then they've, I've got an epidural and then finally I dilated, but it was like, you know, were you able to deliver her sunny side up?

[6:35] Laura Benanti: I delivered her sunny side up.

[6:40] Cara Cooper: That's amazing.

[6:40] Laura Benanti: Yeah. Over here.

[6:43] Laura Benanti: Yeah. Two and a half hours of pushing.

[6:43] Cara Cooper: Not hour 40. So you got me beat my, my, I had midwives and they were like, you have 30 more minutes and then we're going to have to do a C-section. And I was like, I'm going to do that. I mean, not that there's anything wrong with having a C-section. I do think that there is so much sort of like fetishization. Is that the way you say it around like breastfeeding and vaginal birth? And like, you know, I feel like there is so much mom shame that happens when people are like, well, did you have a natural birth?

[7:12] Laura Benanti: Totally. And I'm like, yeah, I carried a baby and I got that baby out. That's natural.

[7:16] Laura Benanti: I had two C-sections. And after my first, I was miserable over the fact that I did not have a vaginal birth, like miserable. And the second time I didn't, because I did all the things I had the doula, I tried for a really, really long time. There were complications. And at that point it was like, are you going to be knocked out and we're going to have an emergency and we have to get this baby out? Or should we bring this baby into the world and you be a part of it? And I was like, that's what I want. But I felt more in charge the second time around, but it was like something to do with afterward.

[7:44] Laura Benanti: But, but there's so much about that. There's so much with breastfeeding. There's so much parenting choices that you make the shame, the mom guilt and the shaming is out of control in our society.

[7:54] Laura Benanti: And that is, I had that with breastfeeding where Ella had like very severe reflux, very severe reflux. And I literally got to the point where I was only eating and I'm not exaggerating. Turkey, sweet potatoes, brown rice, and steamed squash. That's all I ate. And she still couldn't tolerate my breast milk. I went to seven different lactation consultants until finally the last one was like, stop. I was like, I was like emaciated. It was horrible. I wasn't sleeping because she was colicky. And it was a rough go. That was rough.

[8:33] Laura Benanti: I had really bad postpartum depression and anxiety. Thank God I went to a doctor. Thank God I got a medication. Um, you know, thank God for my mother who like really helped me. And, um, you know, it was a really, really challenging time, which is why I try on social media and in all my interviews to be really like an advocate for moms, all moms.

[8:50] Laura Benanti: And, um, you know, my friend Kate and I took a page out of your guys' book because I was so helped by Broadway baby mamas. You know, I've like post on there and, and I received so much help and support and it's a private group, you know, just for Broadway moms. And I was like, I want other people to be able to sort of have this.

[9:12] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[9:12] Laura Benanti: So my friend and I started mamas for mamas on Instagram and our motto is, you know, stay at home or go to work, bottle feeder breast. We're all just mamas and we're doing our best because I cannot tell you the amount of times I was shamed for bottle feeding. A woman asked me if my daughter was adopted and I was like, no. And she was like, have you considered breastfeeding? And I, but you know what, instead of being like, no and go F yourself, I sobbed and told her my whole sob story. And then she walked away like, okay, good. She may not be breastfeeding, but at least she feels terrible about herself. You know, there's this like, yeah, it just drives me crazy.

[9:49] Laura Benanti: The lactivism, the sort of like the fetishizing of breastfeeding and vaginal birth and you know, that only one way is the right way.

[9:59] Jessica Rush: Yes.

[10:02] Laura Benanti: That only, and if that works for you, awesome. It's whatever.

[10:06] Laura Benanti: Yeah, your way is the right way. Exactly. You know, like, you know, if your baby is alive and healthy and happy, then none of it matters.

[10:11] Laura Benanti: I feel like anything short of obviously abusing or hurting your child, whatever works for your family works. We did baby led weaning and people were like, what? You let her pick up a chicken leg? And I'm like, yeah, we did that too. That was great. I loved it, but maybe that doesn't work for your family. And so then you blend and puree. Great. Like I just am so, and I think to Instagram and social media and you know, not just Instagram, but social media in general, it's like, there's two different sections of moms.

[10:40] Laura Benanti: There's the like ethereal breastfeeding in a field, you know, like everything is gorgeous. Everything is perfect. Like, you know, sepia tone moms. And then there's the, like, my kids are bastards. Give me another glass of wine, mom. And there's like nothing in between.

[11:03] Laura Benanti: And I really, it is the in between, right? There's so much about motherhood that is beautiful. And, uh, so it could be, it could be the messiest moment and there's beauty in it. And I think that's what, but there's no cross section and it could be the most beautiful moment and you don't feel prepared for it. And mentally and emotionally, and it feels horrible to you.

[11:18] Laura Benanti: So it's like that to me, the idea that, and I think this is just a deep seated misogyny in our culture and also an internalized misogyny is that women aren't allowed to hold more than one thought or feeling at once that we're not allowed to be ambivalent.

[11:35] Laura Benanti: And that is what I find really fracturing and a challenge. And what I know you guys try to be an antidote to, I'm trying to be an antidote to just the idea that one day you may feel like those blissed out mamas. The other day you may feel like those wine chugging mamas and everything is fine.

[11:51] Jessica Rush: Yeah.

[11:51] Laura Benanti: You know what I mean? And everyone's allowed to be that. But I do think that I know for myself, when I went online and I saw those, those very polarized images, I felt like I didn't belong anywhere. And particularly with the, everything's perfect mamas. I just felt like I am doing this wrong. I don't know how to do it.

[12:10] Laura Benanti: You start to put on yourself to create those moments. Oh my gosh. The amount of photos with the outfits. I mean, my God, Cara and I, we talk about whenever we do photos or whatever, and we would plan our family's outfits and then you're going all over the place. You're like, I can't find the right color, you know, sweater for our, oh my God. I took myself off of social media when my daughter was struggling, when she was very young, because I just couldn't stomach it. I couldn't see the perfectly curated pictures of everybody else's life.

[12:38] Cara Cooper: Exactly.

[12:39] Laura Benanti: And think how I felt my life was crumbling.

[12:41] Cara Cooper: Yep.

[12:42] Laura Benanti: And it just was, it compounded the issue.

[12:44] Cara Cooper: Yep, exactly.

[12:46] Laura Benanti: I think that my mom has said to me several times in watching me parent, she's been like, you guys have it so much harder than we ever did.

[12:54] Cara Cooper: Yes.

[12:55] Laura Benanti: She said, no one cared how we parented.

[12:58] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[12:59] Laura Benanti: We just went on with our lives. We kept our kids alive and she's like, I would throw you in a playpen and make dinner and you would be screaming, but it didn't matter.

[13:08] Cara Cooper: Yes.

[13:09] Laura Benanti: Because that's what you did. Meanwhile, like I'm running around trying to make dinner. Oh my God, are you okay? I don't know. Because there's been this unrealistic image of what motherhood is supposed to be.

[13:22] Cara Cooper: Yes.

[13:23] Laura Benanti: That you are supposed to be like an ethereal goddess with eternal infinite patience. And that is not my reality.

[13:31] Cara Cooper: No.

[13:32] Laura Benanti: I'll tell you that right now. I don't know anybody who it's their reality. I do know people, women who become moms and literally are like, this is all I ever wanted.

[13:42] Cara Cooper: Yes.

[13:43] Laura Benanti: And I feel like I'm fulfilling my destiny right now.

[13:46] Cara Cooper: Yes.

[13:47] Laura Benanti: And I look at them and I'm like, oh my God, that is amazing.

[13:49] Cara Cooper: Me too.

[13:50] Laura Benanti: That is not me.

[13:51] Cara Cooper: Same.

[13:52] Laura Benanti: Not that I don't adore my children. I adore them, but that's not all I ever wanted.

[13:56] Cara Cooper: Yes.

[13:57] Laura Benanti: And I think that there needs to be space to be able to say that.

[14:00] Cara Cooper: 100%.

[14:01] Laura Benanti: And for them to be able to say it.

[14:02] Cara Cooper: Right.

[14:03] Laura Benanti: Because I think those people feel judged too.

[14:05] Cara Cooper: Of course.

[14:06] Laura Benanti: I know some stay-at-home moms who are like, I just feel like when I tell people that I don't work, they judge me. Or when I tell people that I really genuinely like this is all I've ever wanted, they look at me like I'm simple.

[14:19] Cara Cooper: And it was helpful for me to hear that because I think I actually was maybe one of those people who through my envy, because I'm envious.

[14:28] Laura Benanti: It's jealousy for me.

[14:29] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[14:30] Laura Benanti: I wish that that was all I want.

[14:33] Cara Cooper: That's not the way to say it.

[14:34] Laura Benanti: What?

[14:35] Cara Cooper: I wish that that was what I wanted.

[14:37] Laura Benanti: I wish that I felt completely full to the brim through that.

[14:43] Cara Cooper: And I don't.

[14:44] Laura Benanti: Yeah.

[14:45] Cara Cooper: I couldn't agree more.

[14:46] Laura Benanti: So it's like holding space for both.

[14:48] Cara Cooper: We are capable of it.

[14:50] Laura Benanti: Yes.

[14:51] Cara Cooper: It's not easy.

[14:52] Laura Benanti: Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I mean like holding space for even both of the different ways of being like we as women. And I do think as a society, we're capable of it. But people love to pigeonhole us.

[15:03] Cara Cooper: We feel that in our careers.

[15:04] Laura Benanti: We feel that in our lives. It's like people want to compartmentalize you so they can quantify you because it's easier for them.

[15:10] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[15:11] Laura Benanti: It's so easy. I hadn't ever been shamed, I guess is the right word, for working until last week.

[15:18] Cara Cooper: Wow.

[15:19] Laura Benanti: It was so weird.

[15:20] Cara Cooper: That's a long time.

[15:21] Laura Benanti: I know. I felt supported. And maybe I turned a blind eye to it. I don't know. That probably is more what it was. But this was the first time I really recognized it.

[15:30] Cara Cooper: My son takes swim lessons. He's going to be three at the end of October. I have been going and taking him to swim lessons since he was 18 months where I got in the water with him.

[15:38] Laura Benanti: Yeah.

[15:39] Cara Cooper: You know? Now he does it by himself. And a couple of weeks ago, I was in, I think we were recording an episode of this. So I missed his swim lesson. My husband was there. It was fine. And his teacher says, um, are you, are you working? She said, he, all he was talking about was you last week.

[15:59] Laura Benanti: And I said, well, I was, I worked a lot last week. Um, she goes, he really, really was having a hard time. And I wanted to say, you know, at all those swim classes that I got in the, in the water with him, I went and did two shows after that. Every Wednesday I got up, took his ass to swim class, got in the water, took a shower, and got in the train and came into New York and I was working. You never shamed me then.

[16:23] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[16:24] Laura Benanti: Like it was just, I had never experienced it before and she's well-intentioned. I understand that she's caring for my son and seeing that he was struggling. But instead, instead of saying like, yeah, he seems to be having a little bit of a hard time. Is anything different? You know, I just want to let you know so that you're aware of it.

[16:40] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[16:41] Laura Benanti: Done. But it was like, are you, are you working?

[16:44] Cara Cooper: Gross.

[16:45] Laura Benanti: I've gotten a lot of mom shame. I've gotten, you know what it is. I've gotten a lot of people.

[16:49] Cara Cooper: You okay?

[16:52] Laura Benanti: Yeah. I just cut that out. Yeah. I've, I've actually gotten like a lot of backhanded mom shame where people like, Oh God, you work so much. That's, that's amazing. I just couldn't do that. I just couldn't leave my child where I'm like, well, actually she comes with me almost everywhere.

[17:12] Cara Cooper: Which is amazing.

[17:13] Laura Benanti: And hard as hell. Because before I go on set or whatever, I'm not studying my lines, I'm like playing with her or holding her while she screams or whatever. And, and, and it's funny there, there is like a person in my life who I think inadvertently doesn't realize how much she does it where there's this sense of like, Oh gosh, like almost pitying me, you know, where I'm like, yeah, no, that's a lot.

[17:45] Cara Cooper: I mean, I, yeah. And I think that's why like Mamas for Mamas that you guys created. I think that's so great to have a place where you can show the reality and the, when it's the highs and when it's the lows and everything in between. And just, I love that.

[17:58] Laura Benanti: I love that. And you yourself on your own Instagram, I mean, you're so open and you have talked about all kinds of things and you aren't afraid to show it.

[18:09] Cara Cooper: I know that recently you took a break from social media.

[18:12] Laura Benanti: I did. That was amazing. So there's a book that I read called Digital Minimalism and it's incredible. And I just realized that my relationship with social media was becoming a bit unhealthy where I just didn't want to be on my phone that much. Um, and I was realizing that I was like putting too much stock in the likes.

[18:36] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[18:37] Laura Benanti: Yeah. And not even that for me. And it was about, I was feeling like I was spending more time communicating with people on social media than with like my family and friends. And that didn't feel like a healthy balance, you know? Um, so I took a break and it was honestly magical. It really was. And right now what I'm trying to do through sort of the guide posts in this book is take like a step back where I set rules for myself around social media where like I only do it for 30 minutes in the morning. I say what I want to say and then, um, and then I'm like done with it for the rest of the day.

[19:17] Cara Cooper: I have failed.

[19:18] Laura Benanti: Miserably. And I will tell you my anxiety.

[19:21] Cara Cooper: Every day is a new day.

[19:22] Laura Benanti: Yeah. Right. Exactly. But my anxiety spiked considerably when I got back on.

[19:26] Cara Cooper: When you went back.

[19:27] Laura Benanti: Oh. Interesting.

[19:29] Cara Cooper: Yeah. And I feel like part of my job is being on social media.

[19:36] Laura Benanti: And it's on it, like, it's funny, actually I had an agent say to me, um, he was like, you need to have your Instagram be more just pictures of you looking beautiful. And I was like, no, I won't.

[19:48] Cara Cooper: You don't know me.

[19:49] Laura Benanti: Yeah. That's not what I'm interested in. And maybe I would get like, you know, maybe I get sponsored ads or whatever, but like that's the opposite of what I'm trying to do. I think that social media has the power to either unite us or really break us apart. And I think we've seen that on a political level, a social level, an interpersonal level. And I feel a sense of responsibility. I know you guys do too.

[20:12] Cara Cooper: Yeah, for sure.

[20:13] Laura Benanti: For sure. And I know that it's a struggle also, you know, with our kids, what we choose to do. I know recently you decided to not have Ella on your social media anymore, um, which is hard, right? You want to show all aspects of life, but also you want to preserve their autonomy.

[20:33] Cara Cooper: And I struggle with that with Elliot. I know I do. You know what I mean? Like, cause you love them so much and they're so cute and they're so great and you want to share. And for me, you know, family that lives all over the place, you know, you want to say you want them to know who your child is, but at the same time, you know, well, it's just a balance.

[20:52] Laura Benanti: I was thinking about consent too with Ella, like she's not old enough to understand what that is. So she can't give her a seal of approval.

[20:59] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[21:00] Laura Benanti: That was something that was really big for me cause I've been thinking about consent in all its various forms and you know, I have a private Instagram for her where I show her face and that's where you, you know, you saw that video of her bimboing, um, but on my personal one, A, I'd gotten a lot of threats because of my Melania impersonation and one of them was threatening to Ella.

[21:16] Cara Cooper: Yeah.

[21:17] Laura Benanti: We got to come back to that. Yeah. So that really scared me. But then also just in thinking about consent, I realized that there was really no way for Ella to understand, um, what it means that 150,000 people or whatever it is, we're going to be looking at her face and I just thought I, I, I'd rather err on the side of overly cautious. Um, and I hope it didn't seem like pedantic the way that I said it or that anyone else is doing it wrong if they're doing it. But I just felt like, you know what, it's not my place when she is old enough to have, you know, social media.

[21:58] Cara Cooper: I know.

[21:59] Laura Benanti: I know. I'm so scared.

[22:01] Cara Cooper: Well, and it's a different reality when you have 150,000 followers or whatever you have. It's just a different, it's different than, you know, my family who lives in Ohio putting pictures of their kids on Instagram because their followers are their family and friends.

[22:16] Laura Benanti: Exactly.

[22:17] Cara Cooper: You know, it's just a different.

[22:19] Laura Benanti: It is a different thing. Well, and especially, I mean, going back to the Melania, uh, Trump impersonation, I mean, first off you're so good. You're so brilliant. Um, you need to go on YouTube y'all and just find Laura Benanti as Melania Trump on the Colbert show because it's so good.

[22:35] Laura Benanti: Thank you.

[22:36] Cara Cooper: Ivy.

[22:37] Laura Benanti: It's uncanny.

[22:38] Cara Cooper: It's really weird. But I was wondering that. I mean, we hadn't really talked about that, but I was thinking, I'm sure, I'm sure that people come for you.

[22:49] Laura Benanti: Oh yeah.

[22:50] Cara Cooper: And, and that's terrifying.

[22:53] Laura Benanti: It's really scary that I know how scared I got. I put a video up of Elliot getting on the school bus and all of a sudden I was like, can people tell what school she goes to?

[23:00] Cara Cooper: Oh my God.

[23:01] Laura Benanti: Right. What is going on? And no one's looking at me. Do you know what I mean? But like, but you know what I mean? I just thought, oh my God, with Laura and, and the state of our country and the emotions that run very hot, um, can you speak to us about just sort of that experience?

[23:17] Laura Benanti: I mean, it's been a, it's been really challenging. Um, and it's been a real consideration. I had a, an opportunity to do something, it's a secret project that will be happening. I chose not to do it because even though I think it's going to be a huge thing, I think it's going to be like, whoa, like a global sensation. To me, I was like, I thought about it a lot. It would be amazing for my career. But if anything happened to Ella, I would never forgive myself. And so that was the choice that my husband and I made that like, no matter what it might do for me business wise, it's not worth, or, you know, putting our family in danger because I consider my Melania impression pretty innocuous. Like, you know, it's not, there's no mal intent there, you know, we're, we're just, it's fluffy and funny. Right. This other thing is like very funny, but a little bit more hard hitting it out there. And I was like, if already they're coming for me and.

[24:19] Laura Benanti: I think that the most important thing is to just be real about it. I think that we have this idea that we have to be perfect and that we have to have it all together, and that’s just not true.

[24:49] Laura Benanti: I mean, I remember when I was pregnant, I was like, “Oh, I’m going to be this perfect mother,” and then I had my daughter and I was like, “Oh my God, I have no idea what I’m doing.”

[25:19] Laura Benanti: And I think that’s the thing that we need to talk about more, is that it’s okay to not know what you’re doing. It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed.

[25:49] Laura Benanti: I think social media has really distorted our expectations as new mothers. We see these perfect images of motherhood, and it can make us feel like we’re failing if we don’t measure up to that.

[26:19] Laura Benanti: But the truth is, every mother’s journey is different, and we need to support each other in that.

[26:49] Laura Benanti: I’ve had my own struggles with mental health, especially after having my daughter. I experienced postpartum depression, and it was really hard for me to admit that.

[27:19] Laura Benanti: I felt like I was supposed to be this happy, glowing mother, and instead, I was just struggling to get out of bed some days.

[27:49] Laura Benanti: It’s important to talk about these things because so many women go through them, and they need to know that they’re not alone.

[28:19] Laura Benanti: I think we need to create a culture where it’s okay to talk about the hard stuff, where we can be honest about our experiences without fear of judgment.

[28:49] Laura Benanti: And I think that starts with us, as mothers, being real with each other and sharing our stories.

[29:19] Laura Benanti: It’s also about recognizing that every mother has her own path, and we need to support each other in whatever choices we make.

[29:50] Laura Benanti: Whether that’s choosing to go back to work, staying home, or anything in between, we need to lift each other up.

[30:01] Laura Benanti: I think that’s one of the most powerful things we can do as mothers is to create a community of support.

[30:11] Laura Benanti: And that’s what I love about this podcast, is that it’s a space for real conversations about motherhood.

[30:19] Laura Benanti: It’s not just about the highlights; it’s about the struggles and the challenges too.

[30:49] Laura Benanti: So, I’m really grateful to be here and to share my story with you both.

[30:54] Laura Benanti: I think it’s so important to have these conversations, especially in a world where we often feel isolated.

[31:24] Laura Benanti: We need to remind each other that we’re all in this together, and that it’s okay to not have it all figured out.

[31:54] Laura Benanti: I think that’s the beauty of motherhood; it’s messy and complicated, but it’s also incredibly rewarding.

[32:24] Laura Benanti: And I think we need to celebrate that, celebrate the journey, and support each other along the way.

[32:31] Laura Benanti: So, thank you for creating this space for us to talk about these important issues.

[32:39] Laura Benanti: I really appreciate it, and I hope that our conversation can help other mothers feel seen and heard.

[32:47] Laura Benanti: Because at the end of the day, we’re all just doing our best.

[32:54] Laura Benanti: And that’s enough.

[33:14] Laura Benanti: So, let’s keep the conversation going and continue to support each other in this journey of motherhood.

[33:24] Laura Benanti: I think it’s so vital that we create a community where we can share our experiences and lift each other up.

[33:54] Laura Benanti: Because together, we can make a difference and change the narrative around motherhood.

[34:24] Laura Benanti: And that’s what I hope we can achieve through conversations like this.

[34:54] Laura Benanti: So, thank you for having me, and I look forward to continuing this important dialogue.

[35:24] Laura Benanti: Let’s keep it real, and let’s keep supporting each other.

[35:54] Laura Benanti: Because that’s what it’s all about.

[36:24] Laura Benanti: Thank you!

[36:28] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[36:58] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[37:28] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[37:58] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[38:28] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[38:58] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[39:28] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[39:58] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

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[40:58] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

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[48:04] Laura Benanti: Let's get real.

[48:09] Laura Benanti: Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Mamas Talkin' Loud.

[48:14] Laura Benanti: Special shout-outs to Rachel Spencer-Hewitt for our fabulous graphic, Kristen Anderson-Lopez, Bobby Lopez, and Justin Ward-Weber for our super theme song, our producer Dori Berenstein and editor Alan Seales, and of course, the Broadway Podcast Network for bringing us to you.

[48:32] Laura Benanti: Have a good one!