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[0:06] Jess McEnally: Hello, I'm Jesse McEnally.

[0:08] Andrew DeWolf: And I'm Andrew DeWolf.

[0:10] Brianna Jones: And I'm Brianna Jones.

[0:11] Jess McEnally: And welcome to Musicals with Cheese, a podcast where I try to get Andrew and Brie to like musical theater. How are you guys doing today?

[0:19] Andrew DeWolf: Oh man, well, I just joined a gang. We're a happy little family. We run around. We know he we hur we harass uh Puerto Ricans.

[0:26] Brianna Jones: Do you also dance ballet steps while doing it?

[0:29] Andrew DeWolf: Well is it even a gang if you don't?

[0:33] Jess McEnally: You're right, you're right. I mean I I know, but I was a part of your gang. And you know what? I've fallen in love with this girl that I met under the bleachers and or across the gym, depending on what w where you're looking at me.

[0:37] Brianna Jones: Uh-huh.

[0:37] Jess McEnally: And you know what? I think you should stop fighting with the Puerto Ricans.

[0:50] Andrew DeWolf: Man, that sounds like reasonable advice.

[0:52] Jess McEnally: I'm not going to take it. In fact, I'm gonna buy a gun.

[0:55] Brianna Jones: No, you're only doing that in the remake, not in the original.

[0:59] Andrew DeWolf: That's true. That's true. I do like that though. This week we are talking about West Side Story and all of its incarnations. Cue the music, Bree.

[1:08] ♪ Musical number: "Jet Song" — performed by the Jets ♪

[1:50] Jess McEnally: West Side Story is a musical with music by Leonard Bernstein and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim and a book by Arthur Laurents. It was based on William Shakespeare's play Romeo and Juliet. It premiered on Broadway at the Winter Garden Theater on September 26, 1957, and closed June 27, 1959, after 732 performances. So the Broadway show was not a hit. In fact, at the Tonys, it lost Best Musical to The Music Man.

[2:17] Andrew DeWolf: Which, considering it's comparing their like impacts on the grand world in total. The Music Man's pretty good.

[2:24] Brianna Jones: The Music Man's good, but it is a lot more of like the classical Broadway than say West Side Story and its wacky dance numbers and weird experimental storytelling.

[2:34] Jess McEnally: I guess. I can't be upset about The Music Man winning, though.

[2:38] Andrew DeWolf: No, no, no. Um, but the plot is it transposes Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet to the gang-ridden streets of 1950s Manhattan, dominated by the Sharks and the Jets. Two teens from the bitter enemy gangs meet and fall in love at the fateful gym dance.

[2:52] Brianna Jones: Alright. So all three of us have now seen the West Side Story film adaptation by Steven Spielberg. And Andrew and I have both seen the original Robert Wise Jerome Robbins film from 1961.

[3:07] Jess McEnally: And I have forced myself to watch a couple of the Broadway versions so I could see how different it is. Um, including the very not good 2020 production um that both had a dance director that was uh a sexual assaulter, as well as it was basically a film. Like there's more like there's more projected scenes where they're just like showing clips as opposed it feels like a Disney World ride, to be honest, where it's like, alright, we got our animatronic, and now we're just gonna play a clip from The Little Mermaid.

[3:41] Brianna Jones: What? This was on Broadway?

[3:43] Jess McEnally: It was on Broadway when the pandemic closed, and then when it pandemic ended, they did well, didn't end. When Broadway reopened, that show did not reopen.

[3:52] Andrew DeWolf: Understandable.

[3:52] Jess McEnally: Yeah. So I'm curious. Bree, have you ever seen any other version of West Side Story? Or heard of it before this?

[3:59] Brianna Jones: Um, I've heard of it, but I had never seen any other adaptations. I saw this one version of it where they were like old timey and like they spoke in weird way, like language. It was uh it was weird. They had different names though.

[4:13] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I I got your joke there, Andrew.

[4:17] Brianna Jones: Yeah, good joke. I have seen that one too.

[4:21] Jess McEnally: But Bree, you and I got to sit in a theater next to each other and nudge each other, and you got to hear me say and react out loud to bullshit.

[4:28] Brianna Jones: Um I did while watching it. So how was that experience?

[4:33] Brianna Jones: That was fun. You know what? There was only a couple times I could hear you like scoff, and you'd be like, or huh? But really, that was about it. It wasn't too bad. Um, a lot of things were just like impressing me, and then the dumb thing happened where the dumb thing happened, and I was like, oh, you didn't even try there.

[4:57] Jess McEnally: Okay. I don't like West Side Story. I I I never really have.

[5:02] Brianna Jones: I know, I know.

[5:04] Jess McEnally: Because I was telling Jacob, because Jacob went with us, Jacob's my boyfriend. I was telling him, I was like, I didn't like it. And he's like, I thought it was pretty good. And I was like, no, I didn't like it.

[5:14] Andrew DeWolf: But go ahead, Jake.

[5:15] Jess McEnally: So you're both wrong. It was good. And it feels bad, because I know I'm like the hashtag musical theater expert on this show, at least according to like the the the fucking bullshit on our podcast page. But this has always been one that I've never really liked. Like, it's been so hard for me over the years to watch the film adaptation with Robert Wise and Jerome Robbins directing. And that film is so ubiquitous, so like what people think musical theater is, and I watch it and nothing about it is very effective to me. Um, not even mentioning like the brownface and all the other stuff. I don't think it's an effective film, and Sondheim agrees with me, he does not like that film.

[5:56] Andrew DeWolf: And I then only seeing the 61 film, not liking it, not enjoying it, see the Steven Spielberg film, and a lot of the same problems there are fixed. Like it is 85% fixed with what I don't like about the Jerome Robbins Robert Wise film, and I still didn't like it. And I'm like, what is wrong with me?

[6:16] Jess McEnally: So all day today, feeling sick as a dog, um, from my booster, I watched as many bootlegs of Broadway and stage versions of West Side Stories I could get my hands on, and it's still not hitting for me. And I can appreciate its impact on the Broadway world, I appreciate its impact on filmmaking, I appreciate how the songs have entered ubiquity, but there's no fixing the fact that Maria's just gonna go and let the guy that murdered her brother free blast insider and then run off into the night with him? What's gonna like that's like a bridge too far.

[6:53] Andrew DeWolf: That's not a problem with West Side Story, that's a problem with Romeo and Juliet.

[6:56] Jess McEnally: Like, I I don't know what to tell you. You know, take it up with Shakespeare. You know, they they didn't have to keep that part.

[7:03] Brianna Jones: I mean, they kinda did.

[7:04] Jess McEnally: No, they kinda didn't. They can add a whole song about a gun, but they don't they have to keep that specific part in.

[7:10] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, well, how else is the conflict going to start?

[7:14] Jess McEnally: The conflict has started. The conflict is begun.

[7:17] Brianna Jones: But Maria wouldn't be tied to the Sharks in any real way. Like, can you how do you justify that as a character move, Andrew?

[7:25] Andrew DeWolf: Um, well, the way that they justify it in the Shakespeare one is that they're cousins and she doesn't actually give a shit. And I think that's what they should have done. But I think they should have just made Tony not directly responsible for Bernardo's death and have it kind of be like much less intentional. And I know the Spielberg movie adds an arc that is not present in any other version where Tony's getting out of prison and he's on parole and he almost killed a kid, and that's like his big like path is hanging over him, so when he does take a life that means more. That's some good stuff.

[7:55] Jess McEnally: Still don't think he should have killed Bernardo. It should have been a lot more accidental.

[8:00] Andrew DeWolf: I mean it kinda was accidental.

[8:02] Jess McEnally: He was there to stop it from happening.

[8:04] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[8:05] Jess McEnally: Once he like grabs a knife and still. Like I I don't know. I think your problem was with Romeo and Juliet.

[8:12] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, it's just that's the story. Maybe you don't adapt Romeo to Juliet so one-to-one. And on top of that, I am not really engaged by the songs. The songs tend to stop the story, um, in the musical at least, and a lot of it is wheel spinning. And Spielberg does a lot of very smart things to try to make every song have an impact on the story, which I appreciate as well. Um, but that was a lot of my biggest issues with the 61 film is the songs don't push the story. They are very performative and not suited to the film forum.

[8:42] Brianna Jones: I don't think you understand what the story is.

[8:44] Andrew DeWolf: What is the story is dancing and dance fighting. That's what I'm there to see. Every time it cuts to the love story, that's that's the story stopping. The story is when they dance.

[8:59] Jess McEnally: I agree and disagree. Because there are sometimes moments I think are really effective with the dancing. Um, like "Cool" in the Steven Spielberg movie is the only time I've ever liked that song. It has never worked in any other version except for the Spielberg movie. And in no other version has it ever been relevant to the story, really.

[9:21] Andrew DeWolf: I think they did a really good job with the whole gun thing in the Spielberg one.

[9:25] Jess McEnally: Yeah. Um They make the gun more of a like escalation that's going like Riff is like going out of his way to get, and like, I don't know. That's really good. And I think adding that backstory for Tony about him being on parole, which is not present in most versions, is so so good and putting him in a darker spot than he ever was, making him a dangerous character. Where in the other ones he's like, Oh, I'm a nice guy.

[9:50] Brianna Jones: It's yeah, I Tony's very whitewashed.

[9:54] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, a lot of things are whitewashed in the 61 film. Um, but while we're talking about that song, "Cool," in the Broadway show, it is right before they have the discussion about where the meeting is gonna be, where the rumble is gonna be, and that's Riff trying to cool down everyone before the Puerto Ricans come in and they make an arrangement, which doesn't work, really doesn't work.

[10:16] Jess McEnally: And then the movie makes sense.

[10:18] Andrew DeWolf: Yep.

[10:18] Jess McEnally: Then the movie's like, well, that doesn't work. Let's put it somewhere that makes no sense in a different way, and they put it right after the rumble, and it's them trying to calm down after like their their patriarch is dead. I feel like they just have this song and they just sort of like, how do we use it?

[10:32] Andrew DeWolf: Exactly. Um I think the the way to use it is how they used it in the new movie.

[10:37] Jess McEnally: Yeah, and that was a brilliant, brilliant scene. I think that scene was absolutely incredible. Though it it does make you be like, man, why didn't he just throw the gun into the river? He should have just done that.

[10:49] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, yeah. Um another thing I liked about the Spielberg movie that is a problem with the original and the Broadway show is Maria and Tony don't just get married, they just make a vow to each other at a church, which is just cute and works. Where in the movie married.

[11:06] Brianna Jones: I'm pretty sure them actually getting married is from Romeo and Juliet.

[11:10] Jess McEnally: So they actually strayed away from that to make it better.

[11:14] Andrew DeWolf: 100%. And I think the dialogue, um, newly written dialogue by Tony Kushner, who you may recognize from Caroline, or Change or Angels in America, is significantly better and makes every character feel their own, alive and real.

[11:28] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[11:29] Andrew DeWolf: Um, things that are weird in the new one. Let's go.

[11:32] Jess McEnally: But I don't know if I liked as much.

[11:33] Andrew DeWolf: Uh I feel "I Feel Pretty" placement after the rumble. I a little weird. Don't like that.

[11:39] Jess McEnally: Well, um, that's the way it is in the stage show.

[11:43] Andrew DeWolf: Uh I'm not a fan.

[11:45] Jess McEnally: Well, let's talk about how it happens in the stage show. Um, so the rumble ends act one. Y'all go get your dinner and or whatever the fuck your snacks, your $20 wine or whatever the fuck you get during intermission, and you come back and you have that song where everyone can sit down. And the placement works better there than it does in the other film, mostly because it kind of slows down the other film where this is like a much needed break after a really big scene. So I can get the argument.

[12:15] Andrew DeWolf: Now, let's talk about why Sondheim hates this song. Uh, May He Rest in Peace, and why I think he loves this version made by Spielberg a lot. So, Sondheim was very, very young when he did this show. I think he was twenty-six, same age as we are right now when he was hired to do this show, his first professional gig. Um he was basically at the will of Leonard Bernstein, who has very specific needs and he wants very poetic lyrics, where Sondheim is like, I'm not a poetic person. Um, and he described his biggest issue with the song "I Feel Pretty," meaning like, they're too clever of lyrics and they don't suit the character. Like, what Puerto Rican girl coming right off the ship is gonna be like, it's alarming how charming I feel, and make all these clever w rhymes as if she's high class when she isn't. A high-class person doesn't talk or a low-class person doesn't talk this way. It doesn't work.

[13:04] Jess McEnally: So I watched this film, I'm like, alright, let's see how you do it, Spielberg, let's go. And she's making fun of the rich upper class um by pretending to be someone else. So it makes those lyrics suddenly work.

[13:15] Brianna Jones: Yes, it's like a mocking tone almost.

[13:18] Jess McEnally: Exactly. And I can see why you can't change the song, but you can change the context and make those lyrics work, and now Sondheim's super happy with it.

[13:25] Andrew DeWolf: I will say they they add that strong theme of uh like gentrification, uh the evictions going on, uh, which is uh I don't remember really being present at all in the 61 version.

[13:39] Brianna Jones: Not really. Maybe a little bit, like a tiny bit.

[13:41] Andrew DeWolf: They mention it, I think. Like it wasn't really as big a part of it.

[13:45] Jess McEnally: It's more in the Broadway show, though.

[13:47] Andrew DeWolf: Okay. But I like that they kept it for the the new movie though, and they didn't uh honestly I felt like they downplayed a lot of that stuff in the 61 version.

[13:56] Brianna Jones: Yeah, a lot of the 61 film is like stylization, she's gonna do a spinny spin, then we're gonna be in a kaleidoscope, and now we're at the gym.

[14:04] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[14:05] Brianna Jones: So Bree, uh as someone that only saw the Spielberg one, why did you not like it?

[14:11] Brianna Jones: I I do have to agree with Andrew that I think my problem is with Romeo and Juliet and not West Side Story itself.

[14:18] Andrew DeWolf: Uh well, Romeo and Juliet is the worst Shakespeare story.

[14:21] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[14:22] Andrew DeWolf: Just throwing it out there.

[14:23] Brianna Jones: It's the worst thing he's ever written.

[14:24] Andrew DeWolf: Oh god.

[14:26] Brianna Jones: Either of you read Titus?

[14:29] Andrew DeWolf: No.

[14:32] Brianna Jones: The worst of the ones that people like consider good.

[14:35] Andrew DeWolf: You know? Have you have you ever read uh the the the what the fuck is that one? Petruccio one. Fuck.

[14:39] Brianna Jones: The Taming of the Shrew, where you just beat and browbeat a woman until suddenly she's submissive to you, which is the plot.

[14:47] Andrew DeWolf: That sounds like an excellent story.

[14:48] Brianna Jones: I don't know what you're talking about.

[14:50] Andrew DeWolf: Shut up, Andrew.

[14:53] Andrew DeWolf: That's how I get my ladies.

[14:57] Brianna Jones: No.

[14:58] Andrew DeWolf: I thought you put him in the attic.

[15:00] Brianna Jones: Oh, you're right.

[15:01] Andrew DeWolf: You're right.

[15:02] Brianna Jones: Exactly.

[15:03] Andrew DeWolf: Um then they set my house on fire.

[15:05] Brianna Jones: You're right.

[15:06] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, exactly.

[15:07] Jess McEnally: You already admitted to this, Jess.

[15:09] Jess McEnally: I did.

[15:11] Brianna Jones: All right, Bree.

[15:13] Jess McEnally: Well, you already can.

[15:14] Brianna Jones: What was happening?

[15:15] Jess McEnally: I don't remember.

[15:16] Brianna Jones: That's fine.

[15:17] Jess McEnally: We're talking about how bad uh Shakespeare is.

[15:19] Brianna Jones: Shakespeare was.

[15:19] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[15:20] Brianna Jones: Uh yeah, but no, I do I do think um my problem is with the story itself of Romeo and Juliet. I find it very hard to believe that two people would fall in love in a day, get married.

[15:32] Brianna Jones: Uh the, you know, one of them kills their sibling, the other sibling, and then they just run off together. I just find that not believable.

[15:41] Brianna Jones: And so watching it, I'm just like, okay. And you know what's gonna happen. You know he's gonna you know he's gonna die. I mean, I didn't see the original, but I knew I I could I knew what was gonna happen.

[15:52] Brianna Jones: So the dancing, the way it was shot, the music, all of that was great, but it was the story itself I had had a problem with. Uh, but it does sound like they made a lot of progress and a lot of changes to the original that I could see people liking it now.

[16:08] Andrew DeWolf: Well, I think this is just better than Romeo and Juliet.

[16:10] Brianna Jones: Yeah, but yeah.

[16:11] Andrew DeWolf: I'd rather watch this. I mean, Romeo and Juliet doesn't have any fucking bangers in it, and this has at least one and a half.

[16:17] Brianna Jones: It's entertaining. The thing with Romeo and Juliet that I always kinda hated is that the two families just don't like each other for no like discernible reason.

[16:26] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[16:26] Brianna Jones: Right. It's just like some historical thing. Whereas is here it's like steeped in this like uh racial tension, which is like, wow, this is like heavy shit.

[16:38] Andrew DeWolf: All right. Like they don't like each other for reasons that are uh you have to process.

[16:42] Brianna Jones: Well, since we're talking about the racial shit for a second, I want to talk about the 2020 production again. Um the 2020 Broadway revival. Um, which cut I feel pretty, by the way.

[16:51] Andrew DeWolf: It trimmed the entire show to be an hour and forty minutes.

[16:54] Brianna Jones: Um it does not work. Like it does not act it actively does not work.

[16:59] Andrew DeWolf: I mean I feel pretty is a good song though. I mean, even if you don't like where it fits on the show, uh uh you can't cut that.

[17:05] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[17:06] Andrew DeWolf: Well they did. Um and they made the rape of an Anita very, very explicit, um in a horrible, horrible way.

[17:13] Brianna Jones: It's very excellent. Just what we needed.

[17:15] Andrew DeWolf: That's what was missing. They make it take place in modern day, and the Jets are a multicultural group.

[17:22] Brianna Jones: That is missing the point.

[17:24] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it kinda is. Like Tony is a black man, and the Jets are kind of like just a broad boy gang.

[17:35] Brianna Jones: Yeah, and and literally the police side with them at the beginning because they're white. Like that's kind of like a plot plot element, it I feel like as well.

[17:45] Andrew DeWolf: It does. That musical misses the point. That stage version really misses the point.

[17:50] Brianna Jones: So was it like what multicultural group versus the Puerto Ricans?

[17:54] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[17:54] Brianna Jones: That's wow, that's like not good at all.

[17:56] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. It's like, oh, everyone hates them. Okay. That's good.

[18:04] Brianna Jones: And everyone has iPhones on the stage, and then they'll intermediately cut to like the iPhone camera on the big like screen behind them to show the iPhone's point of view, and they'll be like That's like a Dear Evan Hansen thing to do.

[18:17] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it's like West Side Story via Dear Evan Hansen.

[18:21] Brianna Jones: So West Side Story but worse, objectively.

[18:24] Andrew DeWolf: Objectively worse.

[18:25] Brianna Jones: And yet some people liked it a lot for some reason. Maybe I'm just wrong and don't get the dancing.

[18:30] Andrew DeWolf: The dancing wasn't even good.

[18:31] Brianna Jones: Oh, never mind. I was watching it. It was a bunch of you in the audience, and they're all just like, oh good, they cut the dancing.

[18:38] Andrew DeWolf: I don't even hate the dancing. When did I say anything bad about the dancing?

[18:43] Brianna Jones: You always hate the dancing, I thought.

[18:45] Andrew DeWolf: I don't always hate I hate dance breaks. Like I hate it when like there's a five-minute dance break and that's all we're looking at. Like Hello Dolly type stuff. I'm not a big fan of kick lines.

[18:56] Brianna Jones: But this, um, I think the Spielberg film handles the dance elements a lot better than the original.

[19:03] Andrew DeWolf: Um so the film, as I said before, was co-directed by Robert Wise and Jerome Robbins.

[19:09] Andrew DeWolf: And any dance scene, Jerome Robbins would direct, and then any of the dialogue, romance, whatever scenes, Robert Wise would direct.

[19:16] Brianna Jones: And the film feels so disjointed because of that.

[19:20] Andrew DeWolf: Like they feel like it feels like two people directed it and not in a good way.

[19:24] Brianna Jones: Yeah, the you can tell that the camera work is like all over the place, depending on what's going on.

[19:29] Andrew DeWolf: The dance scenes are shot like far away, but like everything it's it's just wacky.

[19:34] Brianna Jones: Yeah, that movie doesn't work.

[19:36] Andrew DeWolf: It does not work for me in any way. I think the pacing is all off. I think that the character work is really ill-defined.

[19:43] Andrew DeWolf: Now, they don't feel like human beings in that film. They feel like props for dancing and for all that. Um, aside from maybe Riff and Bernardo, no one in that movie feels like a genuine person.

[19:54] Brianna Jones: Oh, and of course, Rita Moreno as uh Anita, who would return for the Spielberg film as Doc's wife Valentina.

[20:01] Andrew DeWolf: Which is also changed in the Spielberg one.

[20:03] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[20:04] Andrew DeWolf: Um which did you prefer? The Valentina or Doc?

[20:06] Brianna Jones: I think Valentina is better. It also is like it's like a parallel to what's actually going on. It's like this is what Tony and Maria could have been if everyone wasn't so hateful.

[20:17] Andrew DeWolf: Like, I don't know. I like that too. And also just giving her somewhere works very, very well.

[20:23] Brianna Jones: Yeah. Um, I want to Spielberg is so good at movies.

[20:28] Andrew DeWolf: Like, I know I know this is like not new information.

[20:32] Brianna Jones: Wow, what a hot take.

[20:33] Andrew DeWolf: I I know. But uh sometimes I watch his films that I'm just frustrated that not all films could be made this well.

[20:40] Brianna Jones: And Spielberg's films, ever since he started working with Janusz Kamiński, his new DP that he's had, well not new, he's had since the 90s.

[20:48] Andrew DeWolf: Um, everything he's made, whether it be an Indiana Jones film or Schindler's List, kinda looks like a musical.

[20:55] Brianna Jones: He loves to use these big spotlights coming in through windows, whether they make sense or not. They all look like musicals.

[21:00] Andrew DeWolf: So why has Spielberg not directed a musical until now? It feels like that's the only thing he should have been directing.

[21:07] Brianna Jones: Yeah, I'm really glad that this is uh by Spielberg, though. It's like it's such a good adaptation, and we really need some good musical adaptations right now because there's been some garbo coming out.

[21:19] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, but the thing is this is not doing well at the box office.

[21:22] Brianna Jones: Um yeah, it's only the first weekend. We still got the holiday coming up.

[21:26] Andrew DeWolf: It's made the same. You guys know that in New York we literally just started mask mandates again on Monday.

[21:32] Brianna Jones: Congrats.

[21:33] Andrew DeWolf: So the Monday after this release, everyone is required to wear masks, which means movie theaters are probably not very popular right now.

[21:40] Brianna Jones: I mean, our theater was dead, Brie. It was like the four of us and maybe five or six other people, and it's a big theater. It's 140 seats.

[21:46] Andrew DeWolf: Like, yeah, it w but remember next week we're they're they're looking at 250 million dollar opening for Spider-Man.

[21:55] Brianna Jones: Everyone's gonna go to Spider-Man.

[21:57] Andrew DeWolf: Because the Spider-Man, and it's everyone wants to see the movie they already saw before.

[22:02] Brianna Jones: Yeah, it literally is. Remember Alfred Molina? Remember uh uh uh uh a guy from Lighthouse?

[22:10] Andrew DeWolf: I can't even talk as I'm going to see it too.

[22:12] Brianna Jones: Yeah. That's kind of the pro like you're not even a Marvel guy, but I remember sending you that first trailer, and you're like, guess I have to see this now.

[22:21] Andrew DeWolf: I love those original Sam Raimi movies.

[22:24] Brianna Jones: I I'm just so hoping that somehow, someway Mysterio shows up and it's it's uh Bruce Campbell.

[22:30] Andrew DeWolf: It won't happen.

[22:31] Brianna Jones: It won't.

[22:31] Andrew DeWolf: I would be great.

[22:32] Brianna Jones: I wish.

[22:34] Andrew DeWolf: I wish.

[22:34] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[22:34] Andrew DeWolf: Maybe in like a post-credit scene, maybe we'll see.

[22:39] Brianna Jones: Um Spider-Man.

[22:42] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, West Side Story is made two million its first weekend on like a hundred and fifty million dollar budget.

[22:48] Brianna Jones: Um that is on par with what The Greatest Showman made in its first weekend, released around the same time in December up against Star Wars The Last Jedi.

[22:58] Andrew DeWolf: And then over the feet it had legs to grow, and then by the end of it it made like half a billion dollars. So I'm hoping it has a similar trajectory to that.

[23:06] Brianna Jones: I mean, it's a good movie. I think it can it can go.

[23:10] Andrew DeWolf: Like I thought it was really good.

[23:12] Brianna Jones: I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it a lot. Um, like, while I don't like West Side Story, I want this to succeed.

[23:18] Andrew DeWolf: I want Spielberg to direct more musicals.

[23:20] Brianna Jones: Wouldn't that be great? Couldn't he do a good meme?

[23:22] Andrew DeWolf: Give us a good meme movie, please.

[23:24] Brianna Jones: I I can kind of see West Side Story, like the story not being that great, but it's it's a decent musical, and the movie was nice to see.

[23:31] Andrew DeWolf: Like it's not like a I don't know, it's not like bad.

[23:34] Brianna Jones: No.

[23:34] Andrew DeWolf: I thought it was I thought it was good. But a lot of the fingers are being pointed at the male lead, um, cancelled Ansel Elgort.

[23:41] Brianna Jones: Yeah, I don't know why they picked that.

[23:43] Andrew DeWolf: Well, that's uh I can't defend that. That's not their fault.

[23:45] Brianna Jones: Let's let's rewind, children, all the way back to 2019.

[23:52] Andrew DeWolf: Um, when this film just wrapped production and filming.

[23:55] Brianna Jones: Um they finished this film in I think late 2019, early 2020. Like, I think they had a finished cut.

[24:00] Andrew DeWolf: They had a finished cut in February, because that's when Sondheim saw it.

[24:05] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[24:06] Andrew DeWolf: The allegations for Ansel Elgort came out mid-2020.

[24:10] Brianna Jones: So months after they had the finished film.

[24:12] Andrew DeWolf: So it was like we have the entire movie done, we're still releasing this. What could you have done?

[24:17] Brianna Jones: It would have been even after seeing this film, it would have been impossible to like Christopher Plummer replace him with someone else.

[24:24] Andrew DeWolf: He's in so much of the movie, you can't do anything.

[24:27] Brianna Jones: So Rockin' a Hard Place, do you cut him out of the market?

[24:30] Andrew DeWolf: It kinda it kind of stinks too, because you could probably cast somebody better.

[24:35] Brianna Jones: He is the weakest link.

[24:37] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, he really wasn't that good in the movie. You know what his singing voice reminded me of? It reminded me of someone doing an impression of Adam Driver's voice in Annette.

[24:47] Brianna Jones: Like not Adam Driver in Annette, but a someone doing an impression of it.

[24:52] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, he I I I mean, I don't think he was like terrible, but he's not the worst movie musical choice, but he's still not great.

[24:59] Brianna Jones: Jeez, you could have gotten somebody better that wouldn't also be a detriment to your marketing.

[25:04] Andrew DeWolf: And I think it stands out even more because everyone else in the film is a Broadway pedigree. Ariana DeBose, Mike Faist, um, Rachel Zegler, all of them are on a whole different level than him.

[25:16] Brianna Jones: He'd be good if he was like up against Hugh Jackman or something.

[25:19] Andrew DeWolf: Like he'd be like, Oh, he's alright.

[25:21] Brianna Jones: Oh, yeah, Hugh Jackman, yeah.

[25:24] Andrew DeWolf: Um, but here he's just outclassed by literally everyone else.

[25:29] Brianna Jones: Like, even Officer Krupke is Shrek from Shrek the Musical.

[25:32] Andrew DeWolf: Come on.

[25:33] Brianna Jones: Yeah, he he doesn't even get to sing a line.

[25:35] Andrew DeWolf: No, and he he's great.

[25:36] Brianna Jones: Um, can we talk about the most important thing?

[25:40] Andrew DeWolf: Um, this is super important to me.

[25:42] Brianna Jones: Like, this is the best thing about the Spielberg film's existence, and the thing that got me emotional in the theater.

[25:48] Andrew DeWolf: Mm-hmm.

[25:49] Brianna Jones: So in the musical, there's this character called Anybody's, who in most productions, um, stage show and the original film is this girl that wants to be a part of the Jets group, and they're like, ah nah, get out of here.

[26:00] Andrew DeWolf: And here we have a trans performer, a trans non-binary actor, Iris uh Menas, um, portraying an outright trans non-binary character in the world of this musical.

[26:13] Brianna Jones: This big budget musical released by Disney has a trans character played by a trans actor.

[26:19] Andrew DeWolf: And that's fucking great.

[26:21] Brianna Jones: That is fucking incredible. That is, yeah, absolutely. With a major role, like a major role, as major as any of the other Jets.

[26:29] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, no, it's uh definitely very good. It was nice to see on the big screen, because I feel like you never see that.

[26:35] Brianna Jones: When have you ever seen that? I can't. I'm trying to think of literally one other example and I can't.

[26:40] Andrew DeWolf: So And you know what everyone talking about in the marketing, like, oh, they did the bare minimum by actually casting like Latinx actors and actresses in the Latinx roles, but I think that's a big deal too.

[26:53] Brianna Jones: You didn't have to do that. They could have just done the thing that everyone else did in other versions where it was just like a town boy coming in, wanna be a Jet.

[26:59] Andrew DeWolf: They took it and made it mean something, and that's fucking incredible.

[27:02] Brianna Jones: And their performance when they're like, I I ain't no girl, or I think that was the line, right? I I only saw it one time.

[27:09] Andrew DeWolf: And it was when they were locked up right before um Officer Krupke.

[27:13] Brianna Jones: It was something similar to that, yes.

[27:16] Andrew DeWolf: Like that was the moment I was like, oh fuck, they're doing it. They're doing the thing.

[27:19] Brianna Jones: Like, as much as you could have done in a Disney released musical, they did the thing.

[27:25] Andrew DeWolf: And you know what? Hats off to you, Spielberg. You didn't have to do it.

[27:27] Brianna Jones: And I feel like somebody pushed that through, and that's fucking incredible.

[27:31] Andrew DeWolf: I'm honestly a little surprised knowing that it's from Disney that they allowed that to happen.

[27:36] Brianna Jones: Well, remember, the d the 20th century Fox buyout happened, they just got this film.

[27:41] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, see Disney didn't have a uh say.

[27:44] Brianna Jones: Nope. They just got this film wholesale.

[27:46] Andrew DeWolf: I think if Disney had a say that would not have happened in the movie.

[27:49] Brianna Jones: But thankfully, it is.

[27:50] Andrew DeWolf: Well, when you got Spielberg, I mean, I could see like them being like, hey, can we cut that out?

[27:55] Brianna Jones: Um, and Spielberg has enough clout to be like, no.

[27:58] Andrew DeWolf: No.

[27:59] Andrew DeWolf: I put it in there on purpose. Do you know who the fuck I am?

[28:02] Andrew DeWolf: I am Steven the fucking Spielberg.

[28:06] Jess McEnally: You know what? We've been talking a lot about this film and our opinions, but let's compare our thoughts to those of the New York theater critics when this Broadway musical first hit the stage. It's time for our favorite section, Breviews.

[28:14] Brianna Jones: It's Tomful Previews.

[28:18] Jess McEnally: It's Tomful Previews.

[28:23] Jess McEnally: Uh, this is from theater critic Walter Kerr.

[28:29] Jess McEnally: The radioactive fallout from West Side Story must still be descending on Broadway this morning.

[28:35] Jess McEnally: Director, choreographer, and idea man Jerome Robbins has put together and then blasted apart the most savage, restless, electrifying dance patterns we've been exposed to in a dozen seasons.

[28:47] Jess McEnally: Mr. Robbins never runs out of his original explosive life force, though the essential images are always the same.

[28:55] Jess McEnally: Two spitting groups of people advancing with bared teeth and clawed fists upon one another.

[29:01] Jess McEnally: There is fresh excitement in the next debacle and the next.

[29:05] Jess McEnally: When a gang leader advises his courts to play it cool, the intolerable tension between an effort at control and the instinctive drives of these potential killers is stingingly graphic.

[29:20] Jess McEnally: When the knives come out and the bodies begin to fly wildly through space under buttermilk clouds, the sheer visual excitement is breathtaking.

[29:56] Jess McEnally: But for the most part, he has served the needs of the on-stage thrusting threshing machine setting the fierce beat that fuses a gymnasium dance, putting a mocking insistence behind taunts at a policeman, dramatizing the footwork rather than lifting emotions into song.

[30:18] Jess McEnally: When hero Larry Kurt is stomping out the visionary insistence of something coming, both music and tumultuous story are given their due.

[30:28] Jess McEnally: Otherwise, it's the danced narrative that takes urgent precedence.

[30:34] Andrew DeWolf: Alright. So once again, we have a reviewer much like Andrew, who only likes the dancing.

[30:41] Brianna Jones: We love dancing.

[30:42] Andrew DeWolf: That's the best part.

[30:43] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, when the dancing is so much of it, I mean the dance, the dancing.

[30:48] Brianna Jones: The dancing is good.

[30:51] Andrew DeWolf: It is, but also sometimes I want to get to the story.

[30:55] Andrew DeWolf: Um, like the gym scene, the Mambo scene in the movie, really, really kind of drags where the Spielberg movie is like, alright, we're gonna move the camera so much, so ridiculously much, and use it for character moments.

[31:09] Andrew DeWolf: Like when Chino finally shows his awkward dancing in the Spielberg film.

[31:14] Brianna Jones: My god.

[31:15] Brianna Jones: Chino in general is better in the Spielberg movie.

[31:17] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I feel bad for Chino.

[31:20] Andrew DeWolf: I would have picked Chino over Ansel Elgort, but you know, no one ever asked me what I'd choose.

[31:25] Brianna Jones: He had a job, he had his life together, he was gonna be a lawyer, he was gonna fix machines or something.

[31:30] Andrew DeWolf: Then he went to jail.

[31:31] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[31:32] Brianna Jones: Yeah, he's in jail, so.

[31:34] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, better than Ansel Elgort, who's in hell.

[31:38] Brianna Jones: Wait, he's dead?

[31:39] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, Tony is.

[31:42] Brianna Jones: Oh, right.

[31:43] Jess McEnally: Um, but you know what?

[31:44] Jess McEnally: Well, who did that?

[31:48] Jess McEnally: You know what, Andrew? You bring up a good point.

[31:51] Jess McEnally: I blame Riff.

[31:55] Brianna Jones: Um, yeah.

[31:56] Jess McEnally: You should.

[31:56] Jess McEnally: But you know what? Let's dive into the insane world of Letterboxd now.

[32:01] Jess McEnally: Brie, Andrew, it's time to play five star, one star, where I read you some Letterboxd reviews of both the West Side Story movies, and you have to tell me whether it was a one-star or a five-star.

[32:12] Brianna Jones: Oh, god, I'm so boring.

[32:13] Jess McEnally: Will you tell us which movie it was, or do we just know?

[32:16] Jess McEnally: You don't have to guess that you can just—

[32:16] Brianna Jones: Oh god.

[32:20] Jess McEnally: Are we ready?

[32:21] Brianna Jones: Yeah, sure.

[32:23] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[32:28] Brianna Jones: This review says, I can kill now because I hate this movie now.

[32:33] Jess McEnally: Um, killing is bad.

[32:36] Brianna Jones: Uh five stars.

[32:37] Jess McEnally: That's a one star.

[32:38] Brianna Jones: Shit.

[32:39] Jess McEnally: I find that funny.

[32:41] Jess McEnally: Yeah, they got to the end.

[32:43] Jess McEnally: Alright.

[32:44] Andrew DeWolf: Andrew, your turn.

[32:45] Andrew DeWolf: This feels like it was written by you now that I'm reading it.

[32:47] Andrew DeWolf: Like it feels like, fellas.

[32:50] Andrew DeWolf: Is it gay to have casual dance fights with your bros?

[32:53] Brianna Jones: No, it is not.

[32:54] Brianna Jones: Um, it can be if you want it to, but it is not.

[32:57] Andrew DeWolf: Um, that's five stars.

[32:58] Jess McEnally: That's a one star.

[32:59] Andrew DeWolf: How is that a one star?

[33:00] Brianna Jones: Get out of here.

[33:04] Jess McEnally: Alright, Bree, your turn.

[33:05] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[33:06] Brianna Jones: Being racist is cool.

[33:07] Brianna Jones: Dot dot dot dot dot dot dot.

[33:09] Brianna Jones: If you can dance, sunglasses emoji.

[33:12] Jess McEnally: Oh god.

[33:13] Brianna Jones: Um, star.

[33:15] Jess McEnally: That is correct.

[33:17] Jess McEnally: Alright, Bree's got one.

[33:19] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew, you ready?

[33:21] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[33:22] Andrew DeWolf: Bernardo and Riff had more chemistry than Maria and Tony.

[33:25] Andrew DeWolf: I disagree, but I get the sentiment.

[33:29] Andrew DeWolf: Um, geez.

[33:30] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, that sounds like a one-star, but we've had like three one stars in a row.

[33:33] Andrew DeWolf: Um, lord.

[33:36] Andrew DeWolf: No, I'm taking the risk.

[33:37] Andrew DeWolf: Five stars.

[33:38] Jess McEnally: That is correct!

[33:39] Jess McEnally: Oh, Andrew.

[33:42] Jess McEnally: Alright, Bree, your turn.

[33:44] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[33:45] Brianna Jones: This movie felt like a hate crime.

[33:47] Jess McEnally: One star.

[33:48] Jess McEnally: Correct.

[33:49] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew, you're up.

[33:51] Andrew DeWolf: Alright.

[33:51] Andrew DeWolf: My crush rejected me.

[33:52] Andrew DeWolf: I wanna die.

[33:53] Jess McEnally: Is that even related to the movie?

[33:55] Andrew DeWolf: Who knows, Andrew?

[33:58] Jess McEnally: Letterboxd is full of insane people.

[34:01] Andrew DeWolf: That's that doesn't even happen in the movie.

[34:03] Jess McEnally: Well, maybe that actually happened, and then they watched this movie.

[34:06] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, Andrew.

[34:07] Andrew DeWolf: Oh my god.

[34:08] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, that seems like a one-star.

[34:08] Jess McEnally: One star.

[34:12] Andrew DeWolf: That's the five-star.

[34:13] Jess McEnally: Woohoo!

[34:14] Brianna Jones: Oh my god, that doesn't make sense.

[34:17] Jess McEnally: Alright.

[34:17] Jess McEnally: Bree, you're ready.

[34:18] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[34:19] Brianna Jones: They literally never shut the fuck up.

[34:21] Brianna Jones: If I lived in that neighborhood, I would move.

[34:23] Jess McEnally: One star.

[34:24] Jess McEnally: That's a five star.

[34:26] Brianna Jones: What?

[34:27] Jess McEnally: That makes sense.

[34:28] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew, are you ready?

[34:30] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[34:31] Andrew DeWolf: If they watched Detroit Urban Survival Training, nobody would have died.

[34:36] Andrew DeWolf: Shrug emoji.

[34:37] Jess McEnally: What?

[34:38] Jess McEnally: I don't know what that means.

[34:39] Jess McEnally: They killed each other.

[34:41] Jess McEnally: They didn't like, okay.

[34:42] Andrew DeWolf: Um, five stars.

[34:44] Jess McEnally: That's a one-star.

[34:45] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, that's a one—yeah, okay.

[34:47] Jess McEnally: Alright, Bree, you ready?

[34:49] Brianna Jones: Uh-huh.

[34:50] Brianna Jones: My edible peaked during tonight, and I saw the face of God.

[34:54] Jess McEnally: Five stars.

[34:55] Brianna Jones: That is correct.

[34:56] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew.

[34:58] Andrew DeWolf: Someone give Rachel Zegler an award for pretending to be in love with Ansel Elgort.

[35:04] Andrew DeWolf: Oh my goodness.

[35:06] Andrew DeWolf: I mean.

[35:07] Andrew DeWolf: Good lord.

[35:07] Andrew DeWolf: I'm gonna say one star because they probably don't like that actor.

[35:11] Jess McEnally: So that is correct.

[35:12] Jess McEnally: Okay.

[35:12] Jess McEnally: I think you're tied now, you and Brie.

[35:15] Brianna Jones: I don't know about that.

[35:16] Brianna Jones: I got three.

[35:20] Andrew DeWolf: I think I only had two.

[35:20] Jess McEnally: Nope, you're three now.

[35:22] Jess McEnally: Alright.

[35:22] Jess McEnally: You know what? I'm not keeping track of you, so.

[35:24] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[35:27] Brianna Jones: Not as good as Ghostbusters.

[35:29] Brianna Jones: Which, as someone that has seen Ghostbusters and still doesn't like West Side Story, this is much better than Ghostbusters.

[35:36] Jess McEnally: Really?

[35:36] Jess McEnally: I kind of like Ghostbusters.

[35:38] Brianna Jones: But I guess which one.

[35:39] Jess McEnally: I think they're referring to the new one.

[35:41] Brianna Jones: Oh, that one was horrible.

[35:43] Jess McEnally: Not the lady Ghostbusters, the new new one that just came out.

[35:47] Brianna Jones: Oh, I haven't seen that.

[35:48] Jess McEnally: I feel like you could just say either one of those is horrible, but they both look pretty bad.

[35:52] Brianna Jones: I like the 2016 Ghostbusters.

[35:54] Jess McEnally: With all the ladies?

[35:55] Brianna Jones: Yeah, I like that one.

[35:58] Jess McEnally: That one just looked like the original, but less funny.

[36:00] Brianna Jones: It yeah, at least it looked like a Ghostbusters movie.

[36:03] Jess McEnally: The new one looks like a rip-off of Spielberg, and it was a ripoff of Spielberg.

[36:07] Jess McEnally: It resurrected.

[36:10] Jess McEnally: It was terrible.

[36:11] Jess McEnally: It was so terrible.

[36:13] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[36:13] Brianna Jones: Read me my prompt again.

[36:16] Jess McEnally: Not as good as Ghostbusters.

[36:18] Brianna Jones: Not as good as Ghostbusters.

[36:20] Jess McEnally: Okay.

[36:20] Jess McEnally: One star?

[36:22] Brianna Jones: That is correct.

[36:23] Jess McEnally: That was an easy one, though.

[36:24] Jess McEnally: I mean, they literally were just saying how good they thought it was.

[36:27] Brianna Jones: I don't know.

[36:27] Brianna Jones: You never know, really.

[36:29] Jess McEnally: Alright, alright, Andrew.

[36:31] Jess McEnally: Want some easy ones?

[36:32] Andrew DeWolf: Fine.

[36:32] Andrew DeWolf: Are you giving me the easy ones?

[36:34] Jess McEnally: I don't think I am, but don't go easy on me.

[36:38] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew, you ready?

[36:40] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I'm ready.

[36:41] Andrew DeWolf: If someone killed my brother, I'd thank them.

[36:43] Andrew DeWolf: So I understand, Maria.

[36:45] Jess McEnally: Oh god.

[36:48] Jess McEnally: Five stars.

[36:49] Jess McEnally: That is correct.

[36:52] Jess McEnally: Alright, still a tied game.

[36:54] Jess McEnally: Still a tied game.

[36:55] Jess McEnally: Alright, Bree, you ready?

[36:56] Brianna Jones: I am.

[36:57] Brianna Jones: Halfway in, and nothing has happened.

[36:58] Brianna Jones: I didn't pay $4 to watch gay porn.

[37:03] Andrew DeWolf: Andrew had the best like spit take I've ever seen.

[37:07] Jess McEnally: Wrong videotape, my man.

[37:10] Brianna Jones: Um, $4 for gay porn?

[37:14] Brianna Jones: I mean, that's kind of cheap.

[37:16] Jess McEnally: Uh, five stars.

[37:17] Brianna Jones: That is a one star, Brie.

[37:19] Brianna Jones: Dang it.

[37:20] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew, you ready?

[37:21] Andrew DeWolf: I'm ready.

[37:22] Andrew DeWolf: Get it wrong.

[37:23] Andrew DeWolf: One to KMS at the end.

[37:26] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, they got emotional about the ending.

[37:29] Jess McEnally: Uh, understandable.

[37:30] Jess McEnally: That's one way to react, I guess.

[37:32] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, um, I don't know.

[37:34] Andrew DeWolf: This person seems like they overreact to things.

[37:36] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, maybe a one star.

[37:38] Jess McEnally: That is a five star.

[37:39] Brianna Jones: Dang it.

[37:40] Jess McEnally: Alright, Brie.

[37:41] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[37:41] Jess McEnally: You ready?

[37:42] Brianna Jones: This is the last one.

[37:43] Jess McEnally: One more for you, one more for Andrew, then it's done.

[37:45] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[37:46] Jess McEnally: Oh lord.

[37:47] Jess McEnally: And you guys are still tied, so.

[37:48] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[37:49] Jess McEnally: There's way more sexual chemistry between the gangs than with any of the supposed romantic interests.

[37:54] Brianna Jones: It's like the fifth comment that said that.

[37:56] Jess McEnally: Yeah.

[37:56] Jess McEnally: Um, but do you know, do they think that's a good thing?

[38:00] Brianna Jones: Um.

[38:02] Brianna Jones: One star.

[38:03] Jess McEnally: That's a five star.

[38:05] Brianna Jones: Ah!

[38:05] Jess McEnally: Andrew, you can win this game.

[38:08] Jess McEnally: To be in a gang and dance.

[38:10] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[38:11] Jess McEnally: Yes, it is.

[38:12] Jess McEnally: Objectively.

[38:14] Jess McEnally: Alright, Andrew.

[38:16] Jess McEnally: Last one.

[38:17] Andrew DeWolf: Uh-huh.

[38:17] Andrew DeWolf: It's crazy to think what was happening on the east side during all of this.

[38:21] Andrew DeWolf: Probably not much.

[38:22] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, it's West Side Story.

[38:24] Jess McEnally: Uh, I'm gonna just throw out a five stars.

[38:27] Jess McEnally: Just five stars.

[38:28] Jess McEnally: And Andrew takes the lead and wins.

[38:34] Jess McEnally: It's Brieviews, not Andrew's views.

[38:35] Jess McEnally: Andrew's.

[38:39] Andrew DeWolf: I'm the Letterboxd king.

[38:42] Andrew DeWolf: Undefeated.

[38:44] Jess McEnally: Even if I was, it doesn't count.

[38:46] Jess McEnally: Still depressed about Kremit.

[38:48] Andrew DeWolf: I checked your Twitter the other day to see if that was still in there.

[38:52] Jess McEnally: Yeah, it's great.

[38:53] Jess McEnally: I'm so happy that it's there every time I see his Twitter.

[38:56] Andrew DeWolf: Still depressed about Kremit.

[39:00] Brianna Jones: Aren't we all?

[39:02] Brianna Jones: Aren't we all?

[39:02] Jess McEnally: Man, it's so wacky that this is our last episode of the year, and it feels so low-key and nice.

[39:07] Jess McEnally: Like this just feels like a nice way to wrap up like 2021.

[39:12] Jess McEnally: But it was a good year for Musicals with Cheese, all things considered.

[39:15] Jess McEnally: Which by all means sucked.

[39:15] Jess McEnally: Like, well, thank you to all our Musicals with Cheese fans.

[39:20] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[39:22] Jess McEnally: Um, before our mid-show, just thank you.

[39:23] Jess McEnally: Um, we'll be back.

[39:24] Jess McEnally: Um, yeah.

[39:24] Jess McEnally: Um, how about we go into a mid-show and thank them individually?

[39:35] Brianna Jones: Sure.

[39:35] Jess McEnally: Hey guys, sorry to interrupt you in the middle of the show, but we've got a shishil at you.

[39:40] Jess McEnally: Today's show is brought to you by the extremely kind donations by our donors over at Patreon.

[39:44] Jess McEnally: Patreon's this wonderful place where you can find a lot of cool stuff like Patreon-only commentaries, our episodes a day early, video episodes so you can see all of our beautiful faces.

[39:53] Jess McEnally: And so much more.

[39:54] Jess McEnally: Um, also we have our monthly Patreon meetups.

[39:57] Jess McEnally: We're starting that up again in January, so join in and you can play Jackbox games with me, Andrew, and Brie.

[40:03] Jess McEnally: A ton of fun.

[40:03] Jess McEnally: A lot of people really enjoy them.

[40:05] Jess McEnally: Um, Andrew, who's currently supporting us on Patreon?

[40:08] Andrew DeWolf: Our current patrons.

[40:10] Andrew DeWolf: Let me take a deep breath here because it's a big list.

[40:14] Andrew DeWolf: We have Melissa Goldman, Terry Niddleman, John Donna, Layton Accles, Danielle Rennox, Jess the Stampede, Ewan Cassidy, Tess Skeer, Monica Thoreau, Mina Maniri, Brent Black, Haley Murray, Lithanial Stacey Coombe, Joseph Evans Green, Carrie Ahern, Mary Lou Choquette, John Van Alves, Russ Walker, Musical Hell, Emily Gracie, Tablam, Kyle Summers, Janae C, Scoot in the Technicolor Dreamcoat, Liz Limb, Alison Stoller.

[40:41] Andrew DeWolf: Nothing is certain except Beth and Taxes, Thesbian, Ren Cullen, Wait in the Wings, Raphael Martinez Salaz, Robert Benjamin, Jessica Team, Mitchell Young, Chai Teacup, Katie McDonough, Timothy Keyes, Jeffrey Machado, Chris Marquette, Timimu Robinson, Kiji Marie Anastasio, Leela, RJ Nariga, Sebastian Canino, Avan Reagan, Lizzie Keynes, Charlie B.

[41:07] Andrew DeWolf: Patrick Deering, Courtney Schreiner, Joe, Avery Brinson, Mary.

[41:12] Brianna Jones: Sorry about that.

[41:13] Andrew DeWolf: You're doing great, Arrow.

[41:15] Brianna Jones: Marilyn Brown.

[41:16] Andrew DeWolf: There it is.

[41:23] Brianna Jones: Is that Trinese?

[41:24] Andrew DeWolf: I want to say Trinise.

[41:25] Brianna Jones: Uh, Trinise Massey.

[41:27] Andrew DeWolf: Um, August Gorman, Mac the Knife, Erica S.

[41:31] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, Toriana Vestal, Sammy the Most Lopez, and Lyanna Morton.

[41:39] Andrew DeWolf: Hell yeah!

[41:39] Jess McEnally: You guys all support us this year, and we love you so much.

[41:42] Andrew DeWolf: Andrew did a great job reading your names.

[41:44] Brianna Jones: It did not take forever this time.

[41:46] Jess McEnally: Good lord.

[41:47] Andrew DeWolf: I am just having trouble reading.

[41:49] Brianna Jones: It's okay.

[41:50] Jess McEnally: I'm having trouble speaking.

[41:51] Andrew DeWolf: We're all having issues today.

[41:53] Brianna Jones: I can never read or speak, so we're barely functional three humans on here together every week.

[42:00] Jess McEnally: It's great.

[42:00] Andrew DeWolf: Just edit that and put it at two times speed, and we're all good.

[42:05] Brianna Jones: You've got to embrace the chipmunk voice, though.

[42:07] Jess McEnally: I will embrace it. Um, yeah, they get a lot of fun stuff. Come join us. Our Patreon's great. Um, but let's get back to the show.

[43:12] Andrew DeWolf: So that opening number, the prologue where there's just the dancing and they kind of mess with the sharks' territory, and it ends in the big fight. This scene's pretty great. Like in all versions, it's pretty great. Even in the '61 film, where it's really kind of cheesy and goofy, it works. The Spielberg film really, really made it sing, though. I really like the opening of the Spielberg one. And when they go and they mess with it and they're just painting over the flag there.

[43:41] Brianna Jones: Ooh.

[43:42] Jess McEnally: It's a reveal.

[43:43] Andrew DeWolf: It's a reveal. And I like everyone else looked at Twitter to see if anyone was complaining about that film, which of course they are. They're like, when did West Side Story get woke? Um, and obviously they weren't paying attention to any of the other 900 versions over the last 40 years.

[43:59] Brianna Jones: Well, I mean I could see watching the '61 version and being like, oh, there's plenty of like brown face or whatever. Um, this isn't woke.

[44:07] Jess McEnally: Yeah, it's just like Justin Trudeau's Halloween party.

[44:09] Andrew DeWolf: Like, oh come on.

[44:10] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[44:11] Jess McEnally: No. Um, I feel like if you look at the story though, it's kind of always been woke, quote unquote. Whatever you want to say. I will say strangely, the more recent adaptations are much simultaneously less sympathetic to the Jets and more sympathetic to the Jets. Because they do get significantly more screen time and stage time than the sharks do.

[44:32] Andrew DeWolf: That was my one thing is I kind of wish that the sharks got more screen time overall.

[44:37] Brianna Jones: Mm-hmm.

[44:38] Jess McEnally: Well, they try to give more personality to them in the remake, um specifically Bernardo giving him like his boxing history and all that.

[44:46] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, but they still I mean there's way more focus on the Jets.

[44:50] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[44:50] Jess McEnally: And it bums me out because I don't know, I like the sharks better as human beings. They're not fucking fascists. I feel like the sharks, you can understand their motivations better.

[45:01] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, actually, not their motivations. You could be more sympathetic to their motivations. You understand the motivation of the Jets. I just think that they're it's not a good motivation.

[45:10] Brianna Jones: Yeah, yeah, like I get what your motivations are. They suck dick though.

[45:14] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, whereas the sharks are like, hey, these like white people are fucking with us all the time, so like what if we beat them up?

[45:20] Jess McEnally: Yeah. Hey, they're destroying my fucking like storefront, can we like not do that, please?

[45:27] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, um I think the only good thing I can say about the Jets is that they don't cooperate with the police.

[45:32] Brianna Jones: Yeah, that is the one good thing.

[45:34] Andrew DeWolf: They aren't gonna just rat out to the police to get the sharks in trouble.

[45:38] Jess McEnally: Which is the only bit of nuance that I really feel in the Jets. As strange as that is.

[45:43] Brianna Jones: Yeah, and it's honestly it's honestly a little surprising that they don't cooperate with the police. Um, except for I guess that they don't like them maybe due to something like what happened with Tony where he went to prison.

[45:55] Andrew DeWolf: Well, that's only in the remake version in the remake version. It doesn't really make much sense in the '61. Except for maybe it's like a pride thing they want to deal with the sharks themselves.

[46:04] Jess McEnally: Maybe.

[46:04] Andrew DeWolf: Maybe. It's weird. But it's almost played up as a joke in the '61 film where like if the police come in, they'll suddenly act like good buddies and all that. Like that kind of undercuts their anger at one another.

[46:17] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[46:18] Jess McEnally: I think it's uh it's interesting.

[46:18] Andrew DeWolf: It's interesting.

[46:22] Jess McEnally: Yeah. Interesting is a good word for it. Um, I want to talk about the Jet song, specifically the one in the movie.

[46:30] Andrew DeWolf: Uh the '61 movie.

[46:33] Jess McEnally: When you're a Jet, you're a Jet. All the way from your first cigarette to your last dying day. When you're a Jet, let them do what they can. You've got brothers around. You're a family man. Never alone. You're never disconnected. You're home with your own. Companies expect it. You're wealth protected. Then you are set with the capital J, which you'll never forget till they cart you away when you're a Jet.

[47:02] Andrew DeWolf: You stay up.

[47:07] Jess McEnally: It sounds terrible in the '61 movie. It sounds so bad.

[47:11] Andrew DeWolf: It sounds like someone's improvising over a beat.

[47:16] Jess McEnally: You can't understand a word that they're fucking saying. It's it's not that good in the remake either, in my opinion.

[47:24] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, the lyrics are great, but what the fuck is that score? I don't quite understand it. Um like that part just sounds like they're just making shit up.

[47:35] Jess McEnally: It's a little baffling. I guess they just they needed a song to introduce the Jets, and that was the best they could come up with. They put their effort into other songs, you know.

[47:44] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, but that's also one of the ones that has become iconic. Like you know when you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way, and you know that because it's a melody that plays a lot during the show.

[47:55] Jess McEnally: Yeah. But that song has never sounded good. I don't know what to tell you. It's good, they gotta go back to the drawing board and fix that one up.

[48:02] Andrew DeWolf: Steven Spe Suntime.

[48:04] Jess McEnally: Oh god, I was about to ask him to rewrite it, but no. I'm sad now.

[48:09] Andrew DeWolf: I feel like he didn't write it either, though.

[48:11] Jess McEnally: No, he wrote the lyrics, but I'm like, hey, you know how to write songs. Why don't you go up in there and like fix that one up a little bit?

[48:18] Andrew DeWolf: You gotta call up Leonard and ask him to rewrite it.

[48:20] Jess McEnally: He's dead.

[48:21] Andrew DeWolf: Uh both dead now. All the greats.

[48:23] Jess McEnally: Yeah, except for Steven Spielberg, he's still kicking.

[48:26] Andrew DeWolf: He doesn't make musicals though.

[48:28] Jess McEnally: Well, now he does.

[48:29] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, he's made one. He's got one under his belt. Give us some more. Um that's enough about the Jets song. I don't have anything more to say. I just it's not I want to briefly cover Something's Coming. Um, mostly to compare how they are used in the different film adaptations.

[48:48] Andrew DeWolf: Could be.

[48:58] Jess McEnally: I will know right away, soon as it shows. He may come cannonballing down to the sky, beaming its eye, right as a road. Who knows? It's only just out of reach. Down the block on a beach under a tree. I got a feeling there's a miracle. Do gonna come true. Come into me.

[49:31] Andrew DeWolf: For one, the moment I realized that Spielberg is way too good and should not should always direct musicals, is how I discovered every scene he constructs is structured like a musical number. Um specifically the song or the scene that precedes Something's Coming. The Jet song ends, Riff throws something, then we cut to Tony catching a can and trying to get the last can from Riff throughout that entire scene is just him trying to do that, which is a good representation of the back and forth between them. And like it's Spielberg's so good at scenes that do like four or five things at once. Like, even in the worst Indiana Jones film, he's very, very good at those types of storytelling without putting a focus on it.

Um he puts that toward all of his musical numbers. Take Something's Coming, where in the original show it's like he just has a uh-uh, something's great is coming, I'm gonna go for that. I'm gonna be a great guy, because I'm Tony and I love baseball. Um, baseball metaphors. The Jets baby.

[50:26] Brianna Jones: The Mets baby.

[50:27] Andrew DeWolf: The Mets baby. Um, or in the new Spielberg movie, it is like, hey, you have more potential to be better than you were, which is what the song is now recontextualized to be about, and makes a lot more sense. Uh being about like I'm gonna be better than I was, instead of, hey, something's gonna be good. I want song, I'm the main character, everybody. I think adding the um backstory for Tony of like he almost killed somebody and went to prison for it. It makes it makes more sense that he's got a bit of distance between him and the other Jets because of that. And it makes this song have more weight, and it also kind of makes when he does kill Bernardo have more weight.

[51:08] Brianna Jones: Yeah, really, really.

[51:09] Andrew DeWolf: It just there's just a lot more that works because of just that small change. Spielberg likes adding arcs to his characters, even in the smallest of ways. It really does help the narrative and giving a shit about the story.

[51:22] Jess McEnally: It yeah, I mean it does. Well, we can't not talk about Tonight.

[51:27] Brianna Jones: No.

[51:28] Jess McEnally: Tonight it plays a lot in the score at least. It is a gorgeous song. Like, even as like a number of people meeting in a way that I don't agree with it. It's so very beautiful.

[51:39] Andrew DeWolf: It is so gorgeous.

[51:48] Jess McEnally: The world is full of life. With suns and moons all over the place. Tonight. Tonight.

[52:20] Andrew DeWolf: No better than all he won.

[52:28] Jess McEnally: And what was your song?

[52:42] Andrew DeWolf: I do like this one, yes.

[52:45] Jess McEnally: I don't really know what else to say. It's a very pretty song. They play it quite a bit. Um it's it's kind of in the movie, they almost do it as like an act closer, it felt like in the '61 movie.

[52:59] Andrew DeWolf: Um it might have been both. I feel like there was almost an act close in the new movie as well, where they kind of cut to black for a couple seconds.

[53:04] Jess McEnally: Yeah, they did. I know what you're talking about. Um, also the scene following it, like, is one of my favorite Spielbergisms in the entire film. Spielberg loves his long shots, he loves a long take, and he loves to use his long takes to just set up some character stuff. So my favorite scene in the entire film is the night Maria wakes up after like having her night with Tony, she's still in the dress, and she has to make it look like she slept in her bed. She's like running around messing up her hair, changing into a dress, messing up her pet. That is the best scene in the entire film. And I know it was just something that Spielberg's like, let's we need to do it. It's a character. We finally get to know Maria visually. And I think that's the most important scene in the entire film for Maria.

[53:46] Brianna Jones: Yeah, no, there's a lot of like just little things that are added in that make it feel like there's actual characters in the movie.

[53:52] Jess McEnally: Yes, or the lipstick thing. Like that the added lipstick thing where she's like trying to put lipstick on, then she sees Bernardo and then she wipes it off, and then right before she leaves, she puts it right back on. Like stuff that wasn't there that I know Spielberg is like, how am I gonna make this character feel alive and say a lot about who she is as a person, as opposed to just having her be pretty and sing. So smart.

[54:12] Andrew DeWolf: Spielberg is so much better than everyone else.

[54:16] Jess McEnally: I'm so like so sincere. I don't like West Side Story, though.

[54:22] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, he makes it look good.

[54:23] Jess McEnally: He makes this look easy. He makes filmmaking seem so easy. Um, let's see, you want to talk about America?

[54:31] Brianna Jones: Yeah, we have to.

[54:32] Jess McEnally: We have to. Here you are free and you have pride. Long as you stay on your own side. Free to do anything you choose. Everywhere grime in America. Organized crime in America.

[54:58] Andrew DeWolf: I like this song. It's catchy.

[54:59] Jess McEnally: It is. That's I like Anita as a character. Um she's obviously probably more the most tragic person in the in the most tragic character in the show, at least in my opinion.

[55:12] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[55:13] Jess McEnally: She has this song where she's arguing with Bernardo, um, and then so much bad stuff happens to her that by the end of it she's singing about how she just completely agrees with everything Bernardo said.

[55:24] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it's a fall from grace in a way. Like and like her character arc is becoming worse as a person.

[55:30] Jess McEnally: Yeah.

[55:33] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, and let's just I want to bring up Ariana DeBose as Anita in the Spielberg film, as well as Rita Moreno as Anita in the original film.

[55:42] Andrew DeWolf: Those two are obviously the standouts of their respective pictures, but Ariana DeBose stands out even more because it feels like she's in a different movie than everyone else.

[55:53] Andrew DeWolf: After the two-thirds mark, it seems like Rachel Zegler, Ansel Elgort with the Jets, they're all in a different movie and reacting in a different way.

[56:02] Andrew DeWolf: She's acting in the movie we just saw.

[56:05] Andrew DeWolf: Like, she's acting like my the person I love died, and now her sister wants to fuck her murderer.

[56:12] Andrew DeWolf: What? Like, she is dealing with so much anger, and then she just is like, I'm gonna go do this one thing and then I'm gonna call it a day, and then she gets sexually assaulted by these horrible men.

[56:22] Andrew DeWolf: Like, it is so—and she's playing it like it's a drama.

[56:26] Andrew DeWolf: She's not playing it like it's a comic musical or anything like that.

[56:29] Andrew DeWolf: You can't even be upset at her that she basically gets Tony killed because it's just like whatever.

[56:35] Andrew DeWolf: Like, honestly, fuck them.

[56:37] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[56:38] Andrew DeWolf: Fuck everything.

[56:40] Andrew DeWolf: Everything about this.

[56:41] Andrew DeWolf: Um, Anita is the most compelling character in the entire story.

[56:44] Andrew DeWolf: Very, very tragic character.

[56:46] Andrew DeWolf: Um, very good though.

[56:48] Andrew DeWolf: "America" is a great little song about how she used to be optimistic and now—and then later on you can contrast it with, uh, what is it, "A Boy Like That" or something like that?

[56:58] Jess McEnally: Yeah, "A Boy Like That," which let's hold off on that one just a bit.

[57:02] Jess McEnally: Yeah, I want to briefly talk about, uh, "G Officer Krupke."

[57:06] Andrew DeWolf: Not really as a song, but as a song that has changed placement so much.

[57:12] Andrew DeWolf: Kindly judge, I ran a—

[57:14] Andrew DeWolf: My parents treat me rough with all their marijuana.

[57:17] Andrew DeWolf: They won't give me a puff.

[57:19] Andrew DeWolf: They didn't wanna have me, but somehow I was had leaping wizards!

[57:24] Andrew DeWolf: That's why I'm so bad.

[57:25] Brianna Jones: Right!

[57:26] Andrew DeWolf: "Officer Krupke," you're really a square.

[57:29] Andrew DeWolf: This boy don't need a judge, she needs an analyst.

[57:32] Andrew DeWolf: It's just as neurosis, they oughta be cursed.

[57:36] Andrew DeWolf: Psychologically disturbed.

[57:38] Andrew DeWolf: I'm disturbed!

[57:39] Andrew DeWolf: Wait a second, wait a step, we're the most distant—like, beside the look at where it's currently placed in the song list of the stage version, Andrew.

[57:50] Andrew DeWolf: Look at where that song is.

[57:51] Andrew DeWolf: How did it get there?

[57:54] Andrew DeWolf: It's the second to last song.

[57:56] Brianna Jones: Yeah, in the stage version or so, apparently.

[57:58] Andrew DeWolf: After "A Man Like That," uh, "A Boy Like That," or "Right for a Boy Like That," which is like, it's after the rumble, after the murders, after everything.

[58:07] Andrew DeWolf: Then we have this comic number about how like he's messed up and like all that.

[58:12] Andrew DeWolf: It's such a weird choice.

[58:14] Andrew DeWolf: And the movie just needs to be before the rumble because this song is about why the Jets do what they do.

[58:20] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[58:20] Andrew DeWolf: It's a comedy number.

[58:22] Andrew DeWolf: It's a comedy number that pretty much just leads up to they do what they do because they're bad people.

[58:27] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[58:29] Andrew DeWolf: And it's not a bad song, but also a very goofy number.

[58:35] Andrew DeWolf: And Spielberg really leans into it's goofy, we're gonna make it goofy, we're not gonna take it seriously.

[58:40] Andrew DeWolf: It's gonna be a moment to breathe.

[58:42] Andrew DeWolf: And it works perfectly as that.

[58:44] Andrew DeWolf: He even adds that little character arc into the song by having a character that doesn't matter, uh, step up and start singing.

[58:51] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[58:51] Andrew DeWolf: Because now he understands what it is to be a Jet.

[58:54] Brianna Jones: Exactly.

[58:55] Andrew DeWolf: And wasn't he the one that got nailed in the first scene?

[58:58] Brianna Jones: Yes, I think so.

[58:59] Andrew DeWolf: Like, Spielberg is so fucking good at this.

[59:02] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, wish he adapted a better musical.

[59:07] Andrew DeWolf: He makes this one look good.

[59:06] Brianna Jones: I don't know what to say.

[59:07] Andrew DeWolf: You know, um, what he was supposed to do.

[59:09] Andrew DeWolf: Like he worked on for years and years, and then Sondheim asked to put a kibosh on it.

[59:13] Brianna Jones: Oh.

[59:13] Brianna Jones: What?

[59:13] Andrew DeWolf: He was supposed to do "Gypsy," um, starring Barbra Streisand.

[59:17] Andrew DeWolf: I don't know.

[59:17] Andrew DeWolf: It probably would have been very good.

[59:19] Andrew DeWolf: I don't like Barbra Streisand in that role, but I think that movie would probably have been pretty good.

[59:22] Brianna Jones: They need to change the name of that.

[59:24] Andrew DeWolf: They really do.

[59:26] Andrew DeWolf: But I guess they haven't, so there's not really any other way to refer to it.

[59:29] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[59:31] Andrew DeWolf: Last song.

[59:31] Andrew DeWolf: "A Boy Like That," uh, Anita's big number, literally the most like kind of Sondheim-y number, if that makes sense.

[59:39] Andrew DeWolf: Like the one that feels like a grandiose theater piece.

[59:43] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[59:43] Andrew DeWolf: I think this is my favorite song, it's where the stakes really feel like to ramp up, and it seems to reflect that way in the score.

[59:49] Andrew DeWolf: Where up to this point, it's like the score and the story are kind of separate entities.

[59:53] Andrew DeWolf: This is the one where it feels like they're married together.

[59:57] Andrew DeWolf: "A boy like that wants one thing only.

[59:59] Andrew DeWolf: And when he's done, he'll leave you lonely.

[1:00:02] Andrew DeWolf: He'll matter your love.

[1:00:04] Andrew DeWolf: He better mine.

[1:00:05] Andrew DeWolf: Just wait and see.

[1:00:07] Andrew DeWolf: Just wait, Maria.

[1:00:08] Andrew DeWolf: Just wait and see.

[1:00:15] Andrew DeWolf: It isn't true enough for me.

[1:00:17] Andrew DeWolf: It's true for you enough for me.

[1:00:20] Andrew DeWolf: I hear your words.

[1:00:22] Andrew DeWolf: I know this.

[1:00:25] Andrew DeWolf: But my heart.

[1:00:30] Andrew DeWolf: It isn't fine enough.

[1:00:54] Andrew DeWolf: You should know better.

[1:00:56] Andrew DeWolf: You were in love, or so you said.

[1:01:00] Andrew DeWolf: You should know better.

[1:01:04] Andrew DeWolf: I like this song.

[1:01:06] Andrew DeWolf: Um, and it's—it's almost—it's a sad song in a way.

[1:01:10] Andrew DeWolf: Um, not just because like it makes sense that she doesn't want Maria to be with Tony specifically.

[1:01:15] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[1:01:16] Andrew DeWolf: But she has gone further than that, and now she's just on the you need to stick to your own, um, thing.

[1:01:21] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, you know, which is—it's sad.

[1:01:24] Andrew DeWolf: But you know, that's—that's the point.

[1:01:26] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[1:01:26] Andrew DeWolf: And then Maria, her argument in defense is like, but you loved a guy once too.

[1:01:32] Andrew DeWolf: You know how I feel.

[1:01:34] Brianna Jones: Maria doesn't have a great defense.

[1:01:36] Andrew DeWolf: No, she doesn't.

[1:01:38] Andrew DeWolf: But Maria is, uh, I don't know if she's the brightest character.

[1:01:42] Andrew DeWolf: Tony and Maria kind of, um, empty head, no thoughts, in my opinion.

[1:01:47] Andrew DeWolf: Only love, no thought, only love.

[1:01:50] Andrew DeWolf: Only tonight, only somewhere.

[1:01:53] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[1:01:53] Andrew DeWolf: I feel pretty.

[1:01:54] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[1:01:55] Andrew DeWolf: But I will say Rachel Zegler played that as well as she could have.

[1:02:01] Brianna Jones: She did her best.

[1:02:02] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[1:02:03] Andrew DeWolf: Give her a better musical next time.

[1:02:04] Andrew DeWolf: Apparently she's playing Snow White in Disney's new Snow White live-action adaptation.

[1:02:09] Brianna Jones: So good.

[1:02:11] Andrew DeWolf: I can't wait for that.

[1:02:12] Andrew DeWolf: Directed by the amazing Spider-Man director Mark Webb.

[1:02:15] Brianna Jones: Ah, so they, uh, they got whoever they could, I see.

[1:02:21] Andrew DeWolf: They got the best person for the job, Andrew.

[1:02:23] Andrew DeWolf: Can't you tell how much he loves Snow White almost as much as he loves Spider-Man?

[1:02:23] Andrew DeWolf: He loves Snow White just as much as he loves his bank account.

[1:02:33] Andrew DeWolf: Speaking of bank accounts, Andrew, before we go on to our cheese ratings, it's time for your Sondheim tier list update.

[1:02:40] Brianna Jones: Ba-ba-ba-pa-da-pa!

[1:02:42] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, have this been pasted in the bottom?

[1:02:44] Brianna Jones: It has been.

[1:02:45] Andrew DeWolf: Alright, so can you remind us where your listing was for everything else?

[1:02:49] Andrew DeWolf: Let's see.

[1:02:50] Andrew DeWolf: Well, it's four tiers.

[1:02:52] Andrew DeWolf: Um, we have A tier, B tier, C tier, and D tier.

[1:02:55] Andrew DeWolf: There is no F tier.

[1:02:57] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, there's nothing higher than A.

[1:02:59] Andrew DeWolf: Um, and I've only rated the stuff that we've covered, I'm pretty sure.

[1:03:03] Brianna Jones: Yes.

[1:03:04] Andrew DeWolf: So in A tier, I have, uh, "Sweeney Todd," um, "Gypsy," and "Into the Woods."

[1:03:11] Andrew DeWolf: In B tier, I have, uh, "Merrily."

[1:03:13] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, I believe that's "Sunday in the Park," uh, "Company," and "Follies."

[1:03:18] Andrew DeWolf: In C tier, um, uh, which one was it?

[1:03:21] Brianna Jones: "Pacific Overtures."

[1:03:22] Andrew DeWolf: "Pacific Overtures," "Assassins," and "Passion."

[1:03:26] Andrew DeWolf: And in D tier, I have that TV show "The Primrose" TV show we watched, Jesus Christ.

[1:03:36] Andrew DeWolf: Um, so I'm gonna put "West Side Story" um in B tier.

[1:03:42] Brianna Jones: Oh, I was actually expecting you to put in A tier from how you were glowing about it.

[1:03:47] Andrew DeWolf: No, it's—it's "Romeo and Juliet."

[1:03:49] Andrew DeWolf: I can't like it that much.

[1:03:50] Brianna Jones: That's fair, that's fair.

[1:03:51] Andrew DeWolf: Alright, you guys.

[1:03:52] Andrew DeWolf: What is our overall thoughts on "West Side Story" and our cheese rating?

[1:03:55] Brianna Jones: Bree, why don't you go first?

[1:03:58] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[1:03:58] Brianna Jones: Uh, well you sound so enthralled with our podcast.

[1:04:01] Brianna Jones: You l—you love this, don't you?

[1:04:03] Brianna Jones: Let me, uh, get those yawns out.

[1:04:06] Brianna Jones: Uh, I very much enjoyed going to a movie theater and, uh, getting to see a musical in person with you, Jess, and that was probably my favorite part.

[1:04:17] Brianna Jones: I liked it.

[1:04:18] Brianna Jones: You are a great, uh, seat guest.

[1:04:20] Brianna Jones: I would look over at you and Jake sometimes whispering, and it just made me feel warm.

[1:04:24] Andrew DeWolf: I like hanging out with you, Bree, as a human being.

[1:04:27] Brianna Jones: Oh, I like hanging out with you too.

[1:04:29] Brianna Jones: Uh, but yeah, that was my favorite part of the entire experience.

[1:04:33] Brianna Jones: The movie itself is good.

[1:04:35] Brianna Jones: You should go see it.

[1:04:36] Brianna Jones: Um, again, I just don't love the "Romeo and Juliet" story.

[1:04:41] Brianna Jones: But the music's good.

[1:04:42] Brianna Jones: It sounds like it was a lot better than the original, uh, and that it had purpose, which I like.

[1:04:48] Brianna Jones: Um, and so I'm gonna give it, uh, none other than a New York cheesecake.

[1:04:54] Andrew DeWolf: Because why not?

[1:04:56] Brianna Jones: That's fair.

[1:04:57] Andrew DeWolf: Andrew, what about you?

[1:04:59] Andrew DeWolf: Um, well, I really liked the new movie.

[1:05:03] Andrew DeWolf: And I thought that the older movie was decent.

[1:05:07] Andrew DeWolf: Um, though to be honest, I think with this new one being out, there's not that much reason to go back.

[1:05:12] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, I'd say maybe some of the songs were performed a bit better in the older one.

[1:05:17] Andrew DeWolf: Um, but that's about the only thing that I think wasn't improved.

[1:05:21] Andrew DeWolf: Um, so go watch this.

[1:05:23] Andrew DeWolf: Go see it in theaters if it's still there.

[1:05:25] Andrew DeWolf: I think it's worth a watch.

[1:05:27] Brianna Jones: It's worth a watch in theaters with the good speakers, I agree.

[1:05:30] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[1:05:31] Andrew DeWolf: Um, I mean, yeah, that's—that's all I have to say on that.

[1:05:34] Andrew DeWolf: As far as a cheese rating, um, I'm gonna give it a, uh, a 99 cent, uh, New York, uh, cheese pizza slice, because you know, I don't know, it's good.

[1:05:47] Brianna Jones: You know what?

[1:05:48] Brianna Jones: That's fair.

[1:05:49] Andrew DeWolf: Um, I don't like "West Side Story."

[1:05:52] Andrew DeWolf: I think none of the adaptations have really fixed the issues I have with the show.

[1:05:55] Andrew DeWolf: I find it hard to engage with.

[1:05:57] Andrew DeWolf: I find it very, very unpleasant a lot of the time to listen to.

[1:06:01] Andrew DeWolf: I feel like there's two to three really, really good songs, and the rest of it kind of just washes over me.

[1:06:06] Andrew DeWolf: And it has a very slow as molasses pace until it ramps up, and then it feels like we fast forward to the end.

[1:06:12] Andrew DeWolf: I feel like the pacing and structure are really, really rough.

[1:06:15] Andrew DeWolf: And I think it needs improvement over the years, and that's the best part about theater.

[1:06:19] Andrew DeWolf: Um, but maybe don't cut my "I Feel Pretty" and then have most of the stage show be a movie.

[1:06:25] Andrew DeWolf: Maybe that isn't the best choice for your "West Side Story" adaptation.

[1:06:29] Andrew DeWolf: But you know what?

[1:06:30] Andrew DeWolf: I don't run a Broadway house, so who cares what I think?

[1:06:33] Andrew DeWolf: Um, so I am giving this as a cheese rating.

[1:06:37] Andrew DeWolf: Don Bernardo, uh, cheese, the finest PDO cheese from Spain.

[1:06:42] Andrew DeWolf: Um, and I want it served specifically on the "West Side Story" Cheese Plate sold at Guthrie Theater.

[1:06:49] Brianna Jones: Okay.

[1:06:49] Brianna Jones: They have special cheese plates.

[1:06:51] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it has the "West Side Story" uh, theater or the logo on it.

[1:06:55] Brianna Jones: Would you recommend the new movie as well?

[1:06:57] Andrew DeWolf: It's better than the old movie.

[1:07:00] Andrew DeWolf: It's probably technically one of the best movie musicals ever made.

[1:07:04] Andrew DeWolf: I just wish it weren't, uh, based on "West Side Story."

[1:07:08] Brianna Jones: Well, when movie musicals are often so disappointing, I feel like you can't be, uh, beggars can't be choosers.

[1:07:15] Andrew DeWolf: I agree.

[1:07:16] Andrew DeWolf: This is not a disappointing movie musical.

[1:07:18] Andrew DeWolf: It's good in mostly every way, better than its predecessors, and made me emotional in ways I didn't expect.

[1:07:25] Andrew DeWolf: Um, so yeah, go check it out.

[1:07:27] Andrew DeWolf: Um, more movie musicals like this, please.

[1:07:29] Andrew DeWolf: No more "Greatest Showmans," no more "Dear Evan Hansen."

[1:07:33] Brianna Jones: Yeah.

[1:07:33] Andrew DeWolf: And also happy New Year's, everybody.

[1:07:35] Andrew DeWolf: We'll see you in 2022.

[1:07:39] Brianna Jones: I guess.

[1:07:40] Brianna Jones: Happy New Year.

[1:07:41] Brianna Jones: But let's thank our wonderful listeners.

[1:07:44] Andrew DeWolf: Um, please follow us on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher and Musicals with Cheese, we're on Twitter at Cheesy Musicals, Patreon Musicals with Cheese, Instagram Musicals with Cheese, YouTube page Musicals with Cheese.

[1:07:53] Andrew DeWolf: We have a patron-only podcast called Patreon with Cheese.

[1:07:55] Andrew DeWolf: Email us at musicaltheatrelives@gmail.com.

[1:07:57] Andrew DeWolf: Our title card is created by the amazing Jolene Casco.

[1:08:00] Andrew DeWolf: Go follow them on Instagram at Jolene Casco.

[1:08:02] Andrew DeWolf: Our keeper of the cheese is Juliet Antonio.

[1:08:05] Andrew DeWolf: This show is produced by the incredible, the wonderful, the lovely Brianna Jones.

[1:08:14] Andrew DeWolf: Our theme songs were produced by Robin Nash of IOU Music UK.

[1:08:18] Andrew DeWolf: Thank you to the Broadway Podcast Network for having us on the platform and for knocking us off for talking mad shit about "West Side Story."

[1:08:23] Brianna Jones: Alrighty, guys.

[1:08:24] Brianna Jones: Anything else we should say before we wrap this on up?

[1:08:26] Andrew DeWolf: Maureen!

[1:08:27] Brianna Jones: Happy New Year.

[1:08:28] Andrew DeWolf: Happy New Year.

[1:08:29] Andrew DeWolf: Bye.

[1:08:29] Andrew DeWolf: I met a girl named Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, I feel you, Maria.

[1:08:29] Brianna Jones: Hey, "Joanna's" a better song than "Maria," and I still don't even like "Joanna."

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: I agree, it is a better song.

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I want to be in "Maria."

[1:08:48] Andrew DeWolf: I am gonna be in "Maria."

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: That's Tony's theme.

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: Should old acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind?

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: We're ending on a high note, guys.

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: End of 2021 on "Auld Lang Syne."

[1:08:46] Andrew DeWolf: See you in 2022, bitches.