This transcript was automatically generated and might contain errors.

[0:07] Jesse McAnally: Hello, I'm Jesse McAnally.

[0:09] Andrew DeWolf: And I'm Andrew DeWolf.

[0:11] Liz Eston: And I'm Liz Eston.

[0:12] Jesse McAnally: And welcome to Musicals with Cheese, a podcast where I try to get Andrew and Liz to like musical theater. Guys, how are we doing today?

[0:21] Andrew DeWolf: You know, um, I was doing alright, but then my sister locked herself in a closet and won't come out.

[0:30] Andrew DeWolf: And it's been, it wouldn't be that concerning, but it's been like five or six years.

[0:34] Liz Eston: Yeah.

[0:35] Andrew DeWolf: Is your sister eating food? What's going on with that? How does she put, she hasn't come out?

[0:39] Andrew DeWolf: Does she have a batch? She hasn't come out. It hasn't come out. So I can only assume it's starting to pile up.

[0:46] Andrew DeWolf: Um, maybe she's eating that. Uh, I don't know. When you put your hand on the door, does it feel a little chilly?

[0:55] Jesse McAnally: Just a little cold, which is a little concerning because our house is heated.

[1:00] Andrew DeWolf: So the rest of the house. Was she ever bothered by, you know, wintery weather? Would you say that the cold ever bothered her?

[1:09] Liz Eston: I feel like the cold never bothered her anyways, but I just prefer the summer.

[1:16] Jesse McAnally: This has gotta be the dumbest video we've ever done.

[1:21] Andrew DeWolf: Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, totally, totally.

[1:26] Jesse McAnally: I'm Olaf. What are you, Jess?

[1:29] Jesse McAnally: I guess I'm Kristoff.

[1:32] Andrew DeWolf: Jess, you and I gotta get married.

[1:34] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, you get married.

[1:36] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, I did have, this is a dumb tangent. Feel free to cut this. But I did start like a job once, and like two weeks into the job, they just send me a text. I'm shitting you not at 2 a.m. on like a Thursday saying, I just realized who you look like. You look like Kristoff from Frozen.

[1:55] Andrew DeWolf: And then like somehow I got my LinkedIn picture next to some picture of Kristoff and just sent them both to me. That was the entirety of the conversation.

[2:07] Jesse McAnally: Did you quit immediately the next day?

[2:12] Andrew DeWolf: It was the job that I was only at for three months that I threw up.

[2:16] Jesse McAnally: Okay.

[2:16] Andrew DeWolf: After the Tonys.

[2:18] Jesse McAnally: That was a sign.

[2:19] Andrew DeWolf: Oh yeah. That was the one that this podcast ruined your first day at that job.

[2:26] Jesse McAnally: Um, yeah, the Tonys night. Um, go listen to that episode if you want to hear me slowly degenerate into someone who doesn't have a functioning liver.

[2:35] Jesse McAnally: Um, sadly, we'll never have an episode like that again.

[2:39] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[2:41] Jesse McAnally: I don't think we're gonna change anyone's opinions here because Frozen the Musical sucks, bro.

[2:47] Andrew DeWolf: Well now they know.

[2:51] Jesse McAnally: Let it go.

[2:53] Andrew DeWolf: Let it go.

[2:54] Jesse McAnally: Can't hold it back anymore.

[2:58] Andrew DeWolf: Let it go.

[2:59] Jesse McAnally: Let it go.

[3:01] Andrew DeWolf: Turn away and slam the door.

[3:06] Jesse McAnally: I don't care what they're going to say.

[3:12] Andrew DeWolf: Let the storm rage on.

[3:16] Jesse McAnally: The cold never bothered me anyway.

[3:19] Jesse McAnally: Okay, Frozen the Musical was written by Jennifer Lee, um, with music and lyrics by Kristen Anderson Lopez and Robert Lopez, based on the Frozen film from 2013, written by Chris Buck, Jennifer Lee, and Shane Morris.

[3:31] Jesse McAnally: Previews on Broadway at the St. James Theater began on February 22nd, 2018, with an official opening on March 22nd, 2018.

[3:38] Jesse McAnally: We know what happens next! The production played for 825 performances and 26 previews at the St. James Theater, ending on March 11, 2020.

[3:46] Andrew DeWolf: Say it with us when performances were suspended due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

[3:51] Jesse McAnally: And on May 14th, 2020, Disney Theatrical Productions announced that Frozen would not reopen on Broadway following the pandemic.

[3:59] Jesse McAnally: Um, this is the official release on Playbill.com for Frozen the Musical. Disney's 2013 Oscar-winning film comes to Broadway, a full-length stage work told in two acts, the first and only incarnation of the tale that expands upon and deepens its indelible plot and themes through new songs and story material from the film's creators, including Kristen Anderson Lopez and Jennifer Lee.

[4:25] Jesse McAnally: In fact, this new stage production features more than twice as much music as the film.

[4:32] Andrew DeWolf: No plot. Nothing like that. That is what they put on their Playbill as their plot.

[4:37] Jesse McAnally: Hey, it's like the movie, you know.

[4:40] Andrew DeWolf: The movie. But more. You've seen the movie.

[4:43] Jesse McAnally: But they are right. Um, we did talk about on previous episodes. They, at the same time that this was being developed, they were developing the Hunchback English language version, um, on the West Coast.

[4:58] Jesse McAnally: And they canceled that and fast-tracked Frozen because the Hunchback musical was too expensive and they weren't sure it would be a hit. So they brought this over.

[5:09] Jesse McAnally: Um, and I decided we're gonna talk about this because I recently saw the North American tour of this and had not great thoughts about it.

[5:19] Jesse McAnally: Um, I thought the cast was great. Carolyn Bowman as Elsa was incredible, but Elsa doesn't have much to do in this show, if you think about it.

[5:28] Andrew DeWolf: Um, but then about two weeks ago, I saw Frozen Jr. with a group of youngins.

[5:35] Andrew DeWolf: You motherfucker, did you know these youngins?

[5:38] Jesse McAnally: Like, what's your relationship with these youngins?

[5:40] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, they were family friends.

[5:42] Jesse McAnally: So I just want to be clear for the audience that they are family friends, not random youngins you write into.

[5:49] Andrew DeWolf: No, good, but I want to picture, can we get a picture of this? Like, so you're with your family and they're like six-year-olds, and you're dressed up in your theater snob outfit. You have a turtleneck, the black turtleneck on, and like a notebook to take like critiques into.

[6:08] Andrew DeWolf: So he's a man of a big square.

[6:10] Andrew DeWolf: So he's got a new song.

[6:18] Andrew DeWolf: Um, it was actually my girlfriend's family, so is this at a middle school or an elementary school?

[6:25] Andrew DeWolf: A high school.

[6:26] Jesse McAnally: Why are they doing junior?

[6:27] Andrew DeWolf: It's a high school that goes from like fourth grade to twelfth grade. Like it's all encapsulated.

[6:33] Jesse McAnally: Oh, it's in a, those schools. Okay.

[6:35] Andrew DeWolf: You have like all the seniors playing the main roles, but you also have an ensemble built up of itty bitty ones.

[6:42] Andrew DeWolf: And I was, uh, I'm not gonna shit on a bunch of little kids. Like, let me just say that right now. The acting was not great, just to say the least.

[6:53] Andrew DeWolf: What I want to say is I had a much better time watching Frozen Jr. beginning to end than I did seeing the professional US tour.

[7:02] Jesse McAnally: Um, and I was—

[7:02] Andrew DeWolf: You fucking asshole. Holy shit.

[7:08] Jesse McAnally: No, no, keep going. Keep going. I like it.

[7:10] Andrew DeWolf: Because Frozen Jr., because I think of Into the Woods Jr., they just do the first act. I think of Aristocats Jr., it's an hour. They do two full acts for Frozen Jr.

[7:19] Andrew DeWolf: It just structurally makes more sense.

[7:23] Jesse McAnally: What so—

[7:24] Andrew DeWolf: Hang on, what do they change that makes the difference?

[7:29] Andrew DeWolf: It's just slightly shorter. Like not even incredibly shorter than the stage musical. They like, so you know how we have the new opening songs like The Sunshine On and all that?

[7:41] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, yeah.

[7:41] Andrew DeWolf: All that's still there.

[7:42] Jesse McAnally: Yeah.

[7:43] Andrew DeWolf: That opening is still there, and it still goes the same way. They just cut out all the songs no one wants. They cut out the—they cut out Hans' songs. They cut out the Queen Anointed. We cut out the Dangerous to Dream song. We cut out, um, What Do You Know About Love?

[8:00] Andrew DeWolf: And then they bring up Hugo, which is the Act Two opener, and just put that in Act 1 to like fill that space.

[8:10] Andrew DeWolf: And Act One is so much shorter. It moves at such a quicker pace. We still get to end on Let It Go.

[8:16] Jesse McAnally: And then Act Two just flies on by.

[8:20] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, so this is my first time watching the stage show. I've seen the movie at least once, probably twice. We covered it on the show, kind of, when we did the Disney Plus spinoff.

[8:31] Jesse McAnally: True, true.

[8:32] Andrew DeWolf: The movie is fine. It's not bad. It's not great. It's fine. Um, it's not anything that I would be offended by or not want to watch or anything of that nature.

[8:50] Andrew DeWolf: Um, the stage show, and I got some flack from Jess for saying this, but I feel like there's some things that I like better in the stage show.

[8:58] Jesse McAnally: No.

[8:58] Andrew DeWolf: And there's other things that are just unforgivably bad. And the main thing that is unforgivably bad is all of Act One is the most painful experience you can have at a Disney show.

[9:11] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[9:11] Andrew DeWolf: I want to say, when I saw this live, I could feel in real time. Like there were children all around. Like, there's so many kids in this audience, and I'm like close to the front row, and there's like three kids in front of me and their parents on the end, and just them getting antsy and crawling into their parents' lap, and one of them asks, can we go? Nothing fucking happens.

[9:34] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, it's so like boring. They end Act One where the plot to the movie starts.

[9:41] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[9:42] Jesse McAnally: It's like literally—

[9:44] Andrew DeWolf: But, but, and here's what I liked. Act Two is so fucking fast. It's just like boom, next plot point. Let's go. Alright, boom, boom, boom, boom. Okay, we're done. That was the whole movie in like less than an hour. We're done.

[9:59] Andrew DeWolf: Just like, okay. It's like an act as an acted exhibition and then the movie.

[10:05] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, so it's literally like they made a prequel to the movie, but it's just the beginning of the movie, and it's like 40 to 50 minutes long. That's just the beginning of the movie.

[10:15] Andrew DeWolf: And then you get to watch the movie in like 45 minutes, just like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. You just fly through, there's songs. It's just like, damn, this is the ending, like the ending to Frozen is like so fucking lame.

[10:29] Jesse McAnally: I—it's so fucking long. They go out on the boat thing. It takes fucking forever.

[10:33] Andrew DeWolf: But the ending in the stage show is just like they go out on the water that's frozen, and there's like the boat, and like yes, yes, yeah.

[10:41] Jesse McAnally: It takes so fucking long.

[10:42] Andrew DeWolf: This, they literally, it's just like they hug and they make up and it's like boom, we're done. We're done. The show is over. Get out of here.

[10:50] Jesse McAnally: And you know, I appreciate that. Um, I get that, but also holy shit, that first act.

[11:00] Andrew DeWolf: Um, the first act is, you can't, it's bad.

[11:05] Jesse McAnally: What do we learn? And I know you brought up like I kinda like some of the new songs.

[11:10] Andrew DeWolf: Let's look at those new songs really quick.

[11:12] Jesse McAnally: Um, I like some of the new songs from Act Two.

[11:15] Andrew DeWolf: Okay.

[11:15] Andrew DeWolf: Which I think there's only like one. I love how Elsa has her own very boring ballad, Dangerous to Dream, while getting anointed as queen, where we learn nothing that we didn't already learn from the plot as well as from For the First Time in Forever, which that doesn't count.

[11:33] Jesse McAnally: Oh, that song sucks. It's not a real song.

[11:36] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, get that one out of here. Is it just because we had Cassie Levy and we needed to give her another number?

[11:42] Andrew DeWolf: Um, as well, we have, um, you know, What Do You Know About Love between Anna and Kristoff, which is cool, yeah. They should have like a love ballad. That makes sense. Should it be in the first act? Probably not. Should it be about that? No.

[11:55] Jesse McAnally: But there's also the equivalent to that song from Shrek where Shrek and Fiona talk about how gross they are.

[12:00] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[12:00] Andrew DeWolf: But your Anna and Kristoff singing to each other about how they don't like each other, and it's not fun at all.

[12:06] Jesse McAnally: Yes, yes. Um I don't and then we got Hugo, which I kinda like, but it's in the wrong place of the song. It's in the wrong place of the story, TBH. Um. Also, dance number I l it's a fun cute dance number, whatever. Um, I can't use you, which is a worse version of what we have in the movie, and the junior version just uses what's in the movie, and it's better. The fundamental. We're not gonna talk about the plot of Frozen, because you've all seen the floor. You know the song of Frozen. You probably have a niece who's seen Frozen 80 times, and you have too. You've probably figured it out already, but I think just we need to just quickly, the fundamental flaw. Just the whole the crux of the issue. The real problem is the act one closer had to be let it go.

[13:01] But let it go is the first number in the movie after the main events of the plot start, right? Like I checked me while we were talking, let it go is 30 minutes into an hour and 20 minute movie. And then the rest of the movie happens. So basically the musical stretched out half an hour of movie, and then fast tracked an hour of movie. Yeah, so let it go is the big number because everyone knows it and everything, but it is not an act one closer. Not even remotely. It's an opener. It cannot be your act one closer. Technically, it can't be the opener either, but it should be near the beginning. That's up mid Act One.

[13:45] Andrew DeWolf: That's the mid-act one.

[13:47] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. And I get that that's why everyone's there, and you want to have it be the big thing everyone's waiting for. But you know what? It it it doesn't fit that role. So write a new fucking song. You could just write another song that even uses parts of Let It Go and just put that as the in and like have it fit a different part of the story. Logistically, you know where act one should hit.

[14:10] Andrew DeWolf: Where?

[14:11] Jesse McAnally: And sorry, the act two should hit right after Elsa says, get out of my castle. That is the proper end of Act Two. Then you expand Act Two a little bit, and that's it.

[14:22] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I can literally even picture it. She says, get out of my castle, and then they do like a like a medley where Elsa sings Let It Go again with different lyrics.

[14:30] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[14:31] Andrew DeWolf: And so and Anna is singing something else, and like you get like imagine first time and forever and let it go, going back and forth. And then she gets smacked in the head and she's attacked and she's getting a frozen heart.

[14:44] Jesse McAnally: No, her heart gets frozen and then curtain go. Yeah. Like that's the tension. It's ridiculous that they didn't do something like that. We came up with that. It's it's literally, it was that easy. If they did five fucking seconds of brainstorming beyond just like, oh well, it goes like the big number. That should close act one, I think.

[15:02] It's like if you tried to end act one of Little Mermaid on Part of Your World.

[15:06] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah!

[15:07] Jesse McAnally: It's okay, you can't do that! Five minutes into the show, and then oh, act one's over. Alright, here's Act One Closer. Let's just stretch that out. Stretch out the plot even thicker.

[15:21] Andrew DeWolf: Jesse, I'm gonna do a deep hole. Do you remember when we covered Frozen at the Hyperion?

[15:26] Jesse McAnally: The Disney.

[15:27] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[15:27] Jesse McAnally: That somehow structurally works better. It is a tighter show. It's a better show. Although that's only because it's only an hour. But that's still.

[15:39] Andrew DeWolf: I wouldn't even say it's things in the show.

[15:44] Jesse McAnally: I like the poster for this.

[15:47] Andrew DeWolf: I think the poster is really clever.

[15:50] Jesse McAnally: You're a fucking asshole, dude. You're like, I'm gonna give it a compliment. I like junior version. I like the poster.

[15:55] Andrew DeWolf: I like the poster.

[15:56] Jesse McAnally: Like I like the poster.

[15:58] Andrew DeWolf: You're I also like the poster, but it doesn't fix anything.

[16:03] Jesse McAnally: It doesn't, but I think the poster's really cool. I like it. Have you seen it?

[16:06] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, okay. Have you seen it, Andrew?

[16:10] Andrew DeWolf: I have not seen it, but you want to just share it real quick.

[16:12] Jesse McAnally: I am. Um hold on. You guys can be you guys can all see it because it'll be on our episode art.

[16:17] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, it will be.

[16:18] Jesse McAnally: Well, the album's a little different than the poster.

[16:22] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, not to be.

[16:23] Jesse McAnally: Just use the posters. Just use the poster cooler. You don't use album or every time. Um, so share screen. Did-do-do, screen shit.

[16:31] Jesse McAnally: So, um, this is not the best image in the world. Um, you have both. You have Elsa in the middle of the snowflake, and you have Elsa on the other sides of the snowflake.

[16:42] Andrew DeWolf: I think it's just a neat kind of like playing with the imagery of Frozen with her face everywhere.

[16:47] Jesse McAnally: That's very good.

[16:49] Andrew DeWolf: I didn't notice those little design things in the snowflake before.

[16:52] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, I think that I like that. I also like the way that puppetry is used with uh Olaf as well as Sven.

[17:01] Andrew DeWolf: Even though Sven is horrific to look at.

[17:04] Jesse McAnally: Like, I I it may not deliver as much in a bootleg, but on stage, that thing is terrifying. It has dead eyes.

[17:10] Andrew DeWolf: Is it gonna eat you?

[17:13] Jesse McAnally: It's gonna be so big looking. Because I'm in the second row. It's like animated Sven is like something you want to have as a pet, but like live action stage Sven is something that will attack you in the middle of the night.

[17:24] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, it has no soul, it has no feelings. Um, remake.

[17:29] Jesse McAnally: You're just describing the Lion King remake.

[17:31] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, I a hundred percent am.

[17:34] Jesse McAnally: Um I also like a lot of the original performers, Patty Miran um as Anna doing some good things.

[17:42] Andrew DeWolf: Weird.

[17:44] Jesse McAnally: They do kind of tick Aunt Anna up quite a bit.

[17:47] Andrew DeWolf: Umna talks about her butt like 500% too much.

[17:53] Jesse McAnally: I blanked that out, apparently. Um like she talks about like freeze my butt and running around nude and give him a big bouncy butt. Like things that I'm like, that's a weird thing to make a child say.

[18:07] Andrew DeWolf: This is just your fetish, isn't it?

[18:11] Jesse McAnally: Maybe it's just I'm oversensitive to that thing because the Dan Schneider shit coming out on the quiet on the set documentary. But I'm like, that wasn't in the movie.

[18:21] Andrew DeWolf: Maybe maybe it was originally in the movie, but then they cut it and then they put it in the stage show.

[18:26] Jesse McAnally: There's only one aspect of that. So I the only thing that was written for the movie that was not used and put into the stage show is the little one, two, three together, you and me together, Princess Grand together. That was a little rap that they wrote for a different opening to the movie that didn't get used. And that was the only time I saw that reflected in the stage show.

[18:48] Andrew DeWolf: I I I they don't add anything. Like, if this were like hunchback, where a lot of the story of hunchback is altered heavily in both interpretations of the stage show.

[18:59] Jesse McAnally: Nope.

[19:00] Andrew DeWolf: Nope.

[19:01] Jesse McAnally: If they had done something, imagine. I hate to be this guy that's like, what if I told Disney how to run their cash cow? Um imagine if they just decided to go one percent more of Elsa being the villain of this story and made her a little bit more dark and scary.

[19:17] Andrew DeWolf: You can do that with a musical, guys.

[19:20] Jesse McAnally: No, they can't.

[19:21] Andrew DeWolf: The kids will be mad.

[19:23] Jesse McAnally: Well, they know. Well, the parents will be mad for the kids. Elsa almost murders the guy in the movie.

[19:28] Andrew DeWolf: We just have to kind of make her a little bit more of a threat.

[19:31] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, but he's working for that the guy's working for the bad guys, so it cancels it out.

[19:35] Andrew DeWolf: I don't know if Prince Weasleton is the bad guy.

[19:38] Jesse McAnally: No, he's a secondary villain, Earthlash comic relief.

[19:42] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, okay. Alright. Um, Andrew, do you have more to say? Set design, any of the special effects you liked.

[19:50] Andrew DeWolf: I think I I I said what I liked, and and that's that's that. All the money and all the special effects in the world from Disney cannot compare to a bunch of 10-year-olds coming out and pretending to be the ice and just waving their arms around.

[20:07] Jesse McAnally: Like I was so much more entertained by that kind of shit.

[20:12] Andrew DeWolf: And people just barely making it work. Honestly, there's there's a certain magic to just how earnest it is, you know.

[20:19] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[20:20] Andrew DeWolf: They just put lights on shit and then it's frozen.

[20:23] Jesse McAnally: Okay. Can we talk about Disney musicals?

[20:28] Andrew DeWolf: Not movie musicals, Disney shows.

[20:31] Jesse McAnally: You sent me recently.

[20:35] Andrew DeWolf: Hercules.

[20:36] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[20:37] Andrew DeWolf: This Hercules show.

[20:38] Jesse McAnally: Yes, I did. I want the Hercules show.

[20:59] Andrew DeWolf: It looks really good. Am I I'm not wrong there, am I?

[21:03] Jesse McAnally: No, you aren't. It looks incredible. And guess where it is?

[21:06] Andrew DeWolf: Germany.

[21:07] Jesse McAnally: Ugh.

[21:08] Andrew DeWolf: What the fuck?

[21:09] Jesse McAnally: Germany.

[21:10] Andrew DeWolf: Germany. Why is Germany get the good shit?

[21:12] Jesse McAnally: Why do we get this and Germany gets the hunchback that they got? They get uh fucking Dirk Locker.

[21:20] Andrew DeWolf: Hercules.

[21:23] Jesse McAnally: Sorry to um share the screen again, but take a look at this baby. Like now, we did have an American version of this in the West Coast, much like this.

[21:38] Andrew DeWolf: Um, and didn't really make an impression. Was kind of like just a basically stage production, but this looks incredible.

[21:47] Jesse McAnally: Budget.

[21:48] Andrew DeWolf: It's ridiculous.

[21:49] Jesse McAnally: This is so good. This is budget and effort. Wouldn't it look great if we had stuff like that?

[21:56] Andrew DeWolf: The puppets, the like everything in the costuming?

[22:00] Jesse McAnally: Oh my god. You know for a fact they're gonna add stuff to it that's probably gonna make it like tie into the mythology more than the Disney movie did.

[22:08] Andrew DeWolf: Because like that's what they did with uh hunchback as well.

[22:11] Jesse McAnally: Like they made it like I I don't know. They made it more relationship. Then we also had last year, the Paper Mill Playhouse um had a small production of it of Hercules, the Disney version, with Liz, you're and I best friend Isabella McCallow um playing Meg, which is great casting, but it looks so much cheaper.

[22:33] Andrew DeWolf: Not to be that negative, Nelly.

[22:35] Jesse McAnally: Um it just the money isn't there, the budget isn't there. They aren't putting the effort into that because you know, that's just we don't value theater the same way that European countries do.

[22:45] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[22:45] Jesse McAnally: We don't value fucking anything.

[22:47] Andrew DeWolf: America.

[22:47] Jesse McAnally: Seriously.

[22:48] Andrew DeWolf: Socks, dude.

[22:49] Jesse McAnally: What the fuck? America, wait, why do why are we afraid to have culture?

[22:54] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[22:54] Jesse McAnally: Like any kind, you know?

[22:57] Andrew DeWolf: Like, we'll put our money to Taylor Swift, I guess.

[22:59] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, pure guard.

[23:01] Andrew DeWolf: We love we love Taylor Swift in her 800 gazillion dollar concert, and that's about it.

[23:06] Jesse McAnally: Andrew, I I hate to do this to you.

[23:09] Andrew DeWolf: Um, but I I know we usually watch the seven hour version.

[23:13] Jesse McAnally: No, no, no. I would never do that.

[23:14] Andrew DeWolf: I don't want to watch the 70 version.

[23:19] Jesse McAnally: I think it's a good point to make a tier list really quick.

[23:22] Andrew DeWolf: Alright.

[23:23] Jesse McAnally: Um, Andrew, we've covered a lot of Disney musicals on this. On this show. I don't think you've properly ranked them. So I'm gonna just throw them at you, and there's a little ranking thing at the bottom here.

[23:34] Andrew DeWolf: Remind us we got A B C D.

[23:36] Jesse McAnally: It's A B C D. We've done a lot of tier lists on this show, but it's I always just do A B C D to keep it simple.

[23:41] Andrew DeWolf: Uh it's ranked within itself, so we're only ranking it against other things on the ranking.

[23:47] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[23:47] Andrew DeWolf: So A is the best, D is the worst, uh, and that's it.

[23:51] Jesse McAnally: Alright. Beauty and the Beast, the first one.

[23:55] Andrew DeWolf: Uh Beauty and the Beast, the stage show.

[23:58] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[23:59] Andrew DeWolf: Um I feel like the stage show for all these. I feel like I remember liking this one, but maybe I'm wrong.

[24:04] Jesse McAnally: You don't know.

[24:05] Andrew DeWolf: I'm gonna put it in A, though.

[24:06] Jesse McAnally: Lion King.

[24:07] Andrew DeWolf: Lion King's A. I mean, come on.

[24:09] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[24:11] Jesse McAnally: That is as good as it gets.

[24:12] Andrew DeWolf: Hunchback of Notre Dame.

[24:13] Jesse McAnally: Flash Dirgelochner Von of the World.

[24:15] Andrew DeWolf: Which one?

[24:16] Jesse McAnally: Um, first they're different, so they should be they should be separate.

[24:20] Andrew DeWolf: Dirk Wachner goes Dirk Lockner goes in A, for sure.

[24:23] Jesse McAnally: Okay.

[24:23] Andrew DeWolf: If we're ranking them together, hunchback's an A.

[24:25] Jesse McAnally: Okay.

[24:26] Andrew DeWolf: Tarzan.

[24:27] Jesse McAnally: I bet you forgot we covered that one.

[24:29] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, I forgot that was a thing.

[24:31] Jesse McAnally: Oh my god.

[24:32] Andrew DeWolf: Um C?

[24:34] Jesse McAnally: Maybe D.

[24:35] Andrew DeWolf: I think D.

[24:35] Jesse McAnally: I don't remember.

[24:36] Andrew DeWolf: I can't think of one worse than this.

[24:39] Jesse McAnally: Okay, yeah, we're going D.

[24:40] Andrew DeWolf: D D for Tarzan.

[24:41] Jesse McAnally: I can't. I can't even remember it, which is bad, and honestly, I don't think it was good.

[24:46] Andrew DeWolf: Then the Little Mermaid.

[24:48] Jesse McAnally: The Little Mermaid, we watched that like TV version of it.

[24:51] Andrew DeWolf: I remember that.

[24:52] Jesse McAnally: And we probably watched the real one too.

[24:54] Andrew DeWolf: We did watch the live version.

[24:56] Jesse McAnally: I feel like this is C.

[24:57] Andrew DeWolf: Okay.

[24:58] Jesse McAnally: Uh Frozen.

[25:02] Andrew DeWolf: Uh, Frozen.

[25:04] Jesse McAnally: This is a tough one. I it's definitely between C and D.

[25:07] Andrew DeWolf: Okay.

[25:08] Jesse McAnally: I want to give it C because I feel like there are some redeeming elements, even though the first half is miserable.

[25:17] Andrew DeWolf: I'm gonna put it in C. Jess probably disagrees.

[25:19] Jesse McAnally: He's probably like D.

[25:21] Andrew DeWolf: He's gonna say put in D.

[25:22] Jesse McAnally: I'd say put it in D, but that's not my thing.

[25:25] Andrew DeWolf: Um Winnie the Pooh.

[25:27] Jesse McAnally: Remember that with Grace Aki?

[25:29] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, Winnie the Pooh was actually good.

[25:31] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, it was short and easy.

[25:34] Andrew DeWolf: Now we got Disney musicals that aren't really Disney musicals.

[25:37] Jesse McAnally: Like Aida.

[25:38] Andrew DeWolf: That was this was a weird one.

[25:42] Jesse McAnally: I can't remember if I had strong feelings about this.

[25:46] Andrew DeWolf: You really don't think I did. We'll say B.

[25:48] Jesse McAnally: We don't have anything in B right now, and I don't remember hating or loving this, so then last but not least, we have newsies.

[25:58] Andrew DeWolf: A is stacked, but honestly, newsies goes in A2.

[26:02] Jesse McAnally: Fair enough.

[26:03] Andrew DeWolf: Um I can't disagree with any of those.

[26:05] Jesse McAnally: But you know who probably can?

[26:07] Andrew DeWolf: Who?

[26:08] Jesse McAnally: Critics and Letterboxd.com.

[26:09] Andrew DeWolf: That's it, Liz. You got it.

[26:10] Jesse McAnally: You're learning.

[26:12] Andrew DeWolf: It's time to compare our opinions to those of the critics over on Letterboxd.com.

[26:15] Jesse McAnally: It's the brief use letterbox game.

[26:18] Andrew DeWolf: This is a game where I pulled real letterbox reviews, and Liz and Andrew have to go head to head to guess whether they're a one-star or five-star review based on nothing but the review alone.

[26:25] Are we ready, kids?

[26:26] Liz Eston: Yeah.

[26:27] Andrew DeWolf: Alright. Liz, you're first.

[26:29] Liz Eston: Yay.

[26:31] Andrew DeWolf: I'd like the snowman.

[26:33] Liz Eston: Three question marks.

[26:34] Andrew DeWolf: Um, there's something wrong with you, first of all. Why did you like the Josh Gadman?

[26:39] Liz Eston: Um.

[26:41] Andrew DeWolf: That is correct.

[26:43] Jesse McAnally: Andrew.

[26:44] Andrew DeWolf: Okay. The cold bothers me.

[26:46] Jesse McAnally: I can't lie.

[26:48] Andrew DeWolf: That's a you're disagreeing with the with it, but but you're also referencing a lyric, so I'm gonna actually go five for this.

[26:55] Liz Eston: That is correct, Liz.

[26:57] Liz Eston: Yay ish.

[26:58] Andrew DeWolf: Perhaps.

[27:00] Liz Eston: Perhaps?

[27:01] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[27:02] Liz Eston: Mayhaps.

[27:04] Andrew DeWolf: Mayha.

[27:04] Liz Eston: Tips Fedora.

[27:09] Andrew DeWolf: Uh five.

[27:10] Liz Eston: Correct.

[27:11] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[27:12] Liz Eston: Ice Queen, I'm an Ice Queen too, and Elsa, you need purple shampoo.

[27:16] Andrew DeWolf: I guess to retain the haircut.

[27:19] Liz Eston: I'm gonna go one on this one.

[27:20] Andrew DeWolf: They wanted it to be more radical.

[27:22] Liz Eston: That was a five.

[27:25] Andrew DeWolf: Uh Liz.

[27:27] Liz Eston: Feels bad.

[27:27] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[27:29] Liz Eston: Would have been three stars, but Josh Gadd.

[27:31] Andrew DeWolf: One.

[27:33] Liz Eston: Wow.

[27:33] Andrew DeWolf: That was a five.

[27:35] Liz Eston: They really like Josh Gadd, I guess.

[27:37] Andrew DeWolf: Why do people like Josh Gad?

[27:39] Liz Eston: He's the most annoying personal.

[27:42] Andrew DeWolf: Next to James Gordon.

[27:44] Liz Eston: James Corner actually is my bad.

[27:46] Andrew DeWolf: I actually kind of liked him Gutenberg.

[27:50] Liz Eston: Andrew.

[27:51] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[27:52] Liz Eston: Free my boy.

[27:54] Andrew DeWolf: Which boy?

[27:55] Liz Eston: I was equally baffled.

[27:58] Andrew DeWolf: It's definitely Hans.

[27:59] Liz Eston: We're gonna go one star.

[28:00] Andrew DeWolf: That was a five.

[28:02] Liz Eston: Oh no, we're failing.

[28:04] Andrew DeWolf: Liz.

[28:05] Oh god.

[28:06] Liz Eston: Not enough ice pruns.

[28:08] Andrew DeWolf: Give me Batman and Robin any day instead.

[28:10] Liz Eston: And fun fact: this review was posted the day the film released.

[28:17] Andrew DeWolf: So the day the movie came out, they had to write. They're like, I was right.

[28:21] Liz Eston: They went home from the theater and they were watching Batman and Robin and they were like, this is way better.

[28:26] Andrew DeWolf: Did Letterboxd have an app in 2013?

[28:29] Liz Eston: Oh, so they probably stood on their phone on the drive home from the theater.

[28:34] Andrew DeWolf: Eyes to meet you.

[28:35] Liz Eston: I mean Arnold play Elsa.

[28:38] Andrew DeWolf: The code never bothered me at either.

[28:44] Liz Eston: Oh no, give me my glove buck!

[28:47] Andrew DeWolf: Don't fail!

[28:48] Liz Eston: Don't let them know.

[28:50] Andrew DeWolf: But now they know.

[28:52] Liz Eston: Oh, I wanted to.

[28:56] Andrew DeWolf: No more eyes to meet you no more.

[29:00] Liz Eston: I just imagine like he flexes and the and the ice bolts come out.

[29:04] Andrew DeWolf: No, the dress comes out from underneath.

[29:06] Liz Eston: Like he flexes on the ultra.

[29:10] Andrew DeWolf: The dress like appears.

[29:12] Liz Eston: No dress too.

[29:13] Andrew DeWolf: He's too strong.

[29:16] Liz Eston: He makes a fun after doing it.

[29:18] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[29:19] Liz Eston: But killed the dinosaurs.

[29:21] Andrew DeWolf: Yes, I you know I auditioned for Elsa because I sent a reel from from the Batman movie, and they said we will consider you a Dina Manzel.

[29:33] Liz Eston: You you stolen my job.

[29:37] Andrew DeWolf: You sound nothing like Arnold.

[29:38] Liz Eston: It's crazy.

[29:40] Andrew DeWolf: I I sound like someone though. I'm not sure who it is, though.

[29:44] Liz Eston: Uh you sound like uh Danic Harvey doing Arnold.

[29:49] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, you sound like someone doing Arnold.

[29:50] Liz Eston: I just don't know what actor.

[29:52] Andrew DeWolf: You sound like uh Dr. Killinger from The Venture Brothers.

[29:56] Liz Eston: Y'all follow us on you'll siss on me, you'll silly bitty.

[30:00] Andrew DeWolf: Um, Andrew.

[30:01] Jesse McAnally: Oh, that was a five.

[30:02] Andrew DeWolf: That was a five.

[30:04] Jesse McAnally: I don't even remember.

[30:04] Andrew DeWolf: That was a one.

[30:06] Jesse McAnally: Damn!

[30:07] Andrew DeWolf: I forgot.

[30:08] Jesse McAnally: I was thinking about Arnold.

[30:09] Andrew DeWolf: Alright, last round.

[30:10] Jesse McAnally: Last round, last round.

[30:11] Andrew DeWolf: Alright, I was thinking about Arnold singing let it go.

[30:16] Andrew DeWolf: Um Andrew.

[30:18] Jesse McAnally: Hans is gay.

[30:20] Andrew DeWolf: And it's pr it's written Hans E S gay, period.

[30:25] Jesse McAnally: This is true.

[30:27] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, this is fact.

[30:28] Jesse McAnally: I mean I wouldn't say Hans is gay. He could have just got with Anna.

[30:35] Andrew DeWolf: There was really no reason not to.

[30:36] Jesse McAnally: No, but he's just too evil to like women.

[30:38] Andrew DeWolf: He's really asexual.

[30:40] Jesse McAnally: I put the pussy on a pedestal.

[30:42] Andrew DeWolf: And no pedestal is good enough for me.

[30:44] Jesse McAnally: Hans of the Southern Isle.

[30:46] Andrew DeWolf: Alright. Um, we're gonna say we're gonna say five stars for gay Hans.

[30:51] Jesse McAnally: That is correct.

[30:51] Andrew DeWolf: And Liz.

[30:53] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[30:54] Andrew DeWolf: Um, you could actually win with this one.

[30:56] Jesse McAnally: What?

[30:57] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, Andrew just you're tied right now. Andrew just got you to a tie.

[30:59] Jesse McAnally: I feel so I feel pressure.

[31:03] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, this is great. The good old days when my parents hated me for singing the song.

[31:10] Jesse McAnally: The song. We know what the song is.

[31:11] Andrew DeWolf: We all know what the song is.

[31:13] Jesse McAnally: We were all alive in 2013.

[31:16] Andrew DeWolf: We had an interview.

[31:17] Jesse McAnally: I know. No one ever wanted to build a snowman with me either.

[31:22] Andrew DeWolf: I had siblings and they didn't want to.

[31:24] Jesse McAnally: So five.

[31:25] Andrew DeWolf: That was incorrect.

[31:26] Jesse McAnally: And you guys have tied. Good job, everybody.

[31:30] Andrew DeWolf: Alright. Let's go into a mid-show.

[31:40] Jesse McAnally: Hey guys, sorry to interrupt you in the middle of show, but we've got a shill out of you. Today's show is brought to you by the extremely kind donations by our donors over at Patreon.

[31:47] Andrew DeWolf: Patreon is this wonderful place where you can get a lot of fun perks, such as our episodes a day early. You can kind of get involved in choosing what episodes we pick, as well as our Discord server where we are very active and have a lot of cool things.

[31:59] Jesse McAnally: We also have bonus episodes, Gallivant, Hasbin Hotel, cool shit over there.

[32:04] Andrew DeWolf: Um that being said, uh I uh we announced it last week, but I am gonna reiterate. Um we did make an announcement like post about this, but our show is gonna go under a little change after our 300th episode.

[32:17] Jesse McAnally: It'll still be very much be the same show, but I'll just kind of let Andrew and Liz have a bit more participation, and we'll have a different title, so don't freak out when you see it in it in your little podcatchers.

[32:27] Andrew DeWolf: Still us, still doing the same thing, just a little bit of a refurbish, uh demo reeling, if you could will.

[32:33] Jesse McAnally: Um, Andrew, who is currently that no, we're gonna be just as good as demo reel. Like, don't don't try to hold us up to a high standard.

[32:41] Andrew DeWolf: We can we can be bet as good as a.

[33:04] Jesse McAnally: We're our patrons, Andrew.

[33:06] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, tell us our current patrons or Melissa Goldwyn, Danielle Rennox, Just Stampede, Ewan Cassidy, Monica Thoreau, Brent Black, uh, Lathaniel, Stacey Coombe, Joseph Evans Green, Mary Lucio Cat, John Van Elles, Russ Walker, Musical Hell, Emily Graci's Kyle Summers, Janae C, Scootin' the Tech Tower Dreamcoat.

[33:23] Jesse McAnally: Nothing is certain except Beth and Taxis, Thesbian, Mitchell Young, Chai Kiki Cup, Chris Marcote, Kija Maria Nestagio, Trevi Joseph, RJ Norriga, Julia McLannens, Bjorn Herman's, Toriana Frazier, Sammy the Adequate Amount Jacobson, Kayleigh Blazer, Villainous Miss, Sophina Ali, the Omega Geek, Paige Pearson, Maddie Wargle, Hair Bear Cub, Eliza Erdman, Anna Loskatova, Sarah Den Blaker, Evan Ball, Zachary Therese, Rora Morasso, Mara Fulloin, Lisa L.

[33:51] Andrew DeWolf: Possessed Washing Machine, Nick Roten, Puffy Boy, Sidney Hicks, Annabelle, Billy Clifton, Gold Plated Kikimora, Julia Baldur's daughter, Hutt Muttbutt, Emma, uh, Sabella Stang, and Grace.

[34:08] Jesse McAnally: They all give us some financial support that helps us keep the lights on here, Musicals of Cheese. If you'd like to join them and do some fun stuff, um, yeah, come join us.

[34:16] Andrew DeWolf: Also, we have Patreon meetups. Um, our next one, I believe, is on April 6th. If you can make it, come join us.

[34:23] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, I didn't cut this, Andrew, but I don't think I can make it to that one.

[34:26] Andrew DeWolf: We'll be out of stage.

[34:27] Jesse McAnally: Andrew can't even make it. He's shaking his head like he can't make it.

[34:29] Andrew DeWolf: Well, Jess, you didn't go to the last one, and me and Angrew are running it, so I think it's only fair.

[34:34] Jesse McAnally: I know it is.

[34:35] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[34:36] Jesse McAnally: Um, alright, let's get back to the show.

[34:47] Andrew DeWolf: So we all know the songs from Frozen pretty well.

[34:51] Jesse McAnally: How about the songs from Frozen the Musical that don't really exist?

[34:54] Andrew DeWolf: Like a little bit of you, which is a recurring theme throughout the entire story of Frozen, which I actually think this kind of works. What do you guys think?

[35:07] Jesse McAnally: Woo!

[35:08] Andrew DeWolf: A little bit of you, a little bit of me, you do the magic, and I get to see a little bit of fun.

[35:08] Jesse McAnally: A little bit of magic, and it all takes fight.

[35:28] Andrew DeWolf: Magic, magic, do we have some little bit of I it kind of works, but it really only exists to give uh Olaf a purpose.

[35:46] Jesse McAnally: Because in the original movie, Olaf just kind of shows up and it's like, hey, you built me one time.

[35:51] Andrew DeWolf: And they're like, oh yeah, we did that once, and we never talked about it.

[35:54] Jesse McAnally: Oh yeah, you're a snowman, cool. This one, like, oh, it's a reflection of their sisterhood or whatever.

[36:00] Andrew DeWolf: They're collective. It's their sister baby.

[36:03] Jesse McAnally: I don't like that one. Um it's kind of it's it's like um, it's just taking something that was already there.

[36:13] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[36:17] Jesse McAnally: And it's just making it like literally more, it's more direct. They're making it explicit, which I think is fine. Like if you're looking for places to add songs into a show, like that makes sense. Yeah. Um, so I think this is fine. The only real trouble with it is that it's in act one, and it's just acting as another song to pad out act one. And it's like it's like the kids are waiting to get to do you want to build a snowman, but they keep singing other songs. It's not this song's fault, though. The song itself, I think, is mostly fine.

[36:49] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, the structure of the whole show. That's what's fucking up this song. The recurring feel like this recurring thing in my like, whereas the recurring theme of let the sun shine on, I vehemently hate. And so the royal family is our on the snake. And the people love the princesses and wants the sun shine, let the light be.

[37:40] Jesse McAnally: Okay, why? They're just trying to do the let it go as a theme, and it just doesn't work for me personally. Because it's just like let the sun shine on Did it. It just sounds wrong to your ears, and it perks up in the wrong way, if that makes sense. Um it just makes you think of a song you'd rather be listening to.

[38:02] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, just like real quick. Am I crazy?

[38:04] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[38:05] Andrew DeWolf: Or did the did the original movie open with a song sung by a bunch of uh people collecting ice?

[38:12] Jesse McAnally: Yes, it did. Born of cold and winter, air and mountain rain combining. This icy force, both loud and fair as a frozen harbor. So cut through the heart, cold and clear. Strike for love and strike for fear. See the beauty star venture. Split the ice apart and break the frozen arm.

[38:44] Andrew DeWolf: And it's legit meeting. Is that song not here?

[38:46] Jesse McAnally: That song is not here. And I actually like that song. Like I generally really like that song.

[38:52] Andrew DeWolf: I remember liking that song too. What the fuck? Why did they get rid of that?

[38:57] Jesse McAnally: I think they're trying to put the focus more on the children earlier on and the kingdom earlier on in a more direct way. I don't love it. I feel like but I can see why they do it. It only serves to make act one feel even fucking slower. Because they like removed something from it and then made it longer.

[39:17] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, the song is literally called Frozen Heart, which makes the frozen heart thing later make sense.

[39:22] Jesse McAnally: Oh yeah. That's a good song. It's a really good song.

[39:28] Andrew DeWolf: What, you didn't like that sound doesn't that sound like something?

[39:37] Jesse McAnally: It sounds you wanna know what it sounds like to me. And this just might be. There's that part in Through Heaven's Eyes and Prince of Egypt where it's like, uh That's what it is.

[39:48] Andrew DeWolf: 100% That's what I was thinking of. I was like, what the fuck does that sound like? I'm like, there's like some other show where it's like, na da da da da da da da.

[40:15] Jesse McAnally: Yes, exactly. That's Prince of Egypt. That was like the peak of C C D for me when they got bored and let us watch Prince of Egypt.

[40:23] Andrew DeWolf: Prince of Egypt is fucking Prince of Egypt. They just took it.

[40:26] Jesse McAnally: Oh my god. I knew it. I do want to say this is a better stage show than Prince of Egypt is on stage.

[40:33] Andrew DeWolf: I feel like that's what the movie uh gaps both the frozen movie and the frozen stage.

[40:40] Jesse McAnally: Yes, yes. But my god, that that Prince of Egypt show is rough.

[40:44] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[40:44] Jesse McAnally: But the Prince of Egypt movie is better than the Frozen movie and better than this, and better than Frozen Jr.

[40:51] Andrew DeWolf: Yes.

[40:52] Jesse McAnally: Um I wish I wish it wasn't all white people playing those roles, but that's that's about the worst of my critiques of that.

[40:58] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[40:59] Jesse McAnally: At least it's animated. Um then we have so many, so much songs.

[41:07] Andrew DeWolf: Like, how many songs before we get to like the first real song in Frozen?

[41:10] Jesse McAnally: We have one, two, three, four, four full-length songs before we get to do you want to build a snowman.

[41:17] Andrew DeWolf: Which all the kids are singing in the audience. Isn't that the second song in the fucking movie?

[41:22] Jesse McAnally: It's the second song in the movie. And I'm not lying, all the kids are so fucking antsy during all those songs. They are so frustrated at what they're looking at, which is at the end of the day, a bunch of adults talking to each other.

[41:37] Andrew DeWolf: I can't believe that they padded it out with four new songs before they finally get to do you want to build a snowman. Just open with do you want to build a snowman?

[41:48] Jesse McAnally: Like you kind of want to be.

[41:50] Andrew DeWolf: You can't.

[41:51] Jesse McAnally: Because where is the time? Where are you going to get all of that time?

[41:56] Andrew DeWolf: Like you guys have a character. You can have the characters talk.

[41:59] Jesse McAnally: You know what it reminds me of? And you know what? I appreciate I I hate to sound so positive about this show that's kind of mid. Shrek the musical uses exposition very well to tell a lot of stories in the opening.

[42:12] Andrew DeWolf: No.

[42:13] Jesse McAnally: I I know that friend of the show hates hates Shrek the Musical, but Shrek the Musical does a decent amount of stuff correctly.

[42:23] Andrew DeWolf: It does.

[42:23] Jesse McAnally: Such an economic use of its stage time to get to like they do add stuff to get to the beginning of where Shrek would start to give some backstory. And I feel like if we had just had like a quick like little exposition dump to get us to do You Wanted Little Snowman, I would have been happy.

[42:42] Andrew DeWolf: Like, I know the movie has scenes where these things happen, but like you could have just done a narrator explaining it.

[42:49] Jesse McAnally: I don't need to know how these motherfuckers' parents died, these abusive fucking parents died. You suck.

[42:56] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, the parents literally give bad advice and then die.

[43:04] Jesse McAnally: Bye. They do one thing in this stage show, which is weird, which is make it more give more guilt to Elsa for their death. Because in the stage or in the movie, they're just like, we just have a trip to go on bye. And this one, we have to search the world to find a cure for you, Elsa. We will do everything for you, including this.

[43:28] Andrew DeWolf: If if we die on this trip, you killed us.

[43:30] Jesse McAnally: You know, Elsa. Because of you, because we loved you so much, and we're trying to help you. Wouldn't it be really funny if they showed up at the end and like they're like, we found the cure?

[43:39] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[43:41] Jesse McAnally: They're fine.

[43:42] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, I'm pretty sure that's what happened at the Hyperion one. Like at the in the uh fucking box seats, you see the parents looking down and nodding at them like approvingly.

[43:52] Jesse McAnally: But aren't they like ghosts in that sense?

[43:55] Andrew DeWolf: Fucking Statler and Waldorf up there.

[44:01] Jesse McAnally: So I wish I was frozen, so I didn't have to watch anymore.

[44:04] Andrew DeWolf: Oh those are my favorite Muppets.

[44:07] Jesse McAnally: It's really sad.

[44:09] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I mean, we need more Hans.

[44:13] Jesse McAnally: Nobody sings about this humble face, or my lack of grace, or quotes what comes out of my mouth.

[44:23] Andrew DeWolf: Thank goodness.

[44:26] Jesse McAnally: I've journeyed a long way to see your sister crowned to honor and to back you. Yet here I go and smack you to the ground.

[44:38] Andrew DeWolf: Please accept the humblest of apologies from a clumsy prince who's only come to serve and please with a line of mean big brothers that goes.

[44:58] Jesse McAnally: A man you won't see in a statue of bronze.

[45:04] Andrew DeWolf: Just Hans of the Southern Is of the Southern Isles.

[45:14] Jesse McAnally: Hi, Anna of Arendelle.

[45:21] Andrew DeWolf: Bro character that did not need to sing.

[45:25] Jesse McAnally: No, we didn't. This character. This character blows. I'm sorry. He sucks.

[45:30] Andrew DeWolf: You see, this is where I feel like we are blessed with internet creating better content too much. So when Frozen came out, everyone was like, Why didn't Hans get a villain song? So a lot of very talented young artists on the internet made a villain rendition of Love is an open door, where Hans just sings about murdering Anna.

[45:52] Jesse McAnally: And I'm like, oh, that sounds like a brilliant idea to like incorporate themes and make a villain song for Hans, and they did not do that. Instead, they write the most boring, lamest fucking regal song ever, and he just does a a very untouched reprise in act two.

[46:09] Andrew DeWolf: It's barely a villain song.

[46:10] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. Like calling it that is like it's it's like the most technical, like, well, he's the villain, and this is his song, so it's a villain song.

[46:19] Andrew DeWolf: It's like it doesn't even sound like a villain song.

[46:22] Jesse McAnally: He doesn't even does he even say anything that's like particularly like evil.

[46:27] Andrew DeWolf: I mean, I feel like he does.

[46:28] Jesse McAnally: If only there was someone that loved you.

[46:30] Andrew DeWolf: Well, he okay, in the in the second reprise, you mean?

[46:33] Jesse McAnally: No, no, that's just a line he says.

[46:36] Andrew DeWolf: Let's run the movies.

[46:36] Jesse McAnally: We have to say.

[46:36] Andrew DeWolf: Oh, no, no.

[46:37] Jesse McAnally: I I mean, yeah, that he says that, but like I mean, in the song.

[46:41] Andrew DeWolf: Once I kill Elsa and give you this ring, I will be King Hans of the Arendel.

[46:45] Jesse McAnally: That is literally the last line of that song.

[46:48] Andrew DeWolf: Well, in the first in the first version of the song, it's just him saying he has a lot of brothers and he's sad.

[46:52] Jesse McAnally: Yeah.

[46:53] Andrew DeWolf: That's it.

[46:54] Jesse McAnally: Got bait. I'm a beta cuck to my big brothers.

[46:57] Andrew DeWolf: Which I guess this is the this is the villain song that this villain deserves because this villain sucks.

[47:04] Jesse McAnally: He's voiced by Santina Fontana in the first movie.

[47:08] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[47:08] Jesse McAnally: Um, the guy that ruined Crazy X Girl.

[47:11] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, okay, he kind of ruined it, but Frozen, like Frozen Hans is such a shit character because this movie this movie doesn't need a villain.

[47:22] Jesse McAnally: No.

[47:22] Andrew DeWolf: The villain is Elsa.

[47:24] Jesse McAnally: Elsa's the villain. She's also the protector. Like, that's like that's the structure of the of it.

[47:29] Andrew DeWolf: And then they're just like, well, let's just have a second one.

[47:31] Jesse McAnally: You know the narrative. Works just as well if Hans just died trying to capture Elsa from the mountains.

[47:37] Andrew DeWolf: He just fell off the mountain.

[47:40] Jesse McAnally: It works.

[47:40] Andrew DeWolf: It works just as well if he's just not even introduced.

[47:44] Jesse McAnally: It works well if you just make the cattle as Anna being like, I want to get married, and Elsa being like, no, you can't do that right now.

[47:50] Andrew DeWolf: You gotta like it.

[47:51] Jesse McAnally: Wouldn't it have been great if they just killed Hans though?

[47:54] Andrew DeWolf: Like they introduce a Hans just dies.

[47:57] Jesse McAnally: Yes.

[47:58] Andrew DeWolf: He's not even like a twist villain or anything.

[48:00] Jesse McAnally: It's just like you think he's the love interest, and then he's just he just dies.

[48:03] Andrew DeWolf: Like that's something that Disney would never do.

[48:06] Jesse McAnally: In Anastasia, though, like Tom Buluth and Anastasia would have pulled that shit.

[48:09] Andrew DeWolf: He would have had fun too.

[48:11] Jesse McAnally: Why didn't they just do an Anastasia and introduce a new villain?

[48:14] Andrew DeWolf: Oh man.

[48:15] Jesse McAnally: Like music, that's the joy of a stage musical version is you don't need to just do the movie on stage.

[48:22] Jesse McAnally: Well, the issue is Disney wants to sell tickets, and if they change too much, then they're gonna not sell tickets, and the kids won't go see it, and they'll be all rattled.

[48:32] Andrew DeWolf: So kid's gonna have a panic attack because Hans didn't do exactly what he did in the movie.

[48:37] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, basically. Moving on, moving on, moving on. Uh, Hugh Higgy?

[48:43] Andrew DeWolf: Hugo Hugo.

[48:47] Jesse McAnally: Most importantly, it can't be Hugh without your family and friends!

[49:03] Andrew DeWolf: Okay, this song's really like dumb, but I like it. It's really fun. It's really good. I think it's a good addition. I like this character that they have with his family.

[49:13] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. This is fine. This is a great addition. A great, I can't tell why he's gay in this one though.

[49:20] Andrew DeWolf: So the first movie is by seeing gay, but yes, I wish they had leaned more into that. I will say, can I talk about my junior production for a second?

[49:32] Jesse McAnally: Oh yes.

[49:33] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, tell us about Hugo. Um, I looked. Oh god. This boy who played Oaken.

[49:42] Jesse McAnally: Oaken.

[49:43] Andrew DeWolf: Okay. Did not have any other role in the show because I expected like an ensemble member. And then he comes out and just is a ball of charm the entire time, and I am just like, hell yeah! And then he never shows up again.

[49:57] Jesse McAnally: My mark! Bring it back.

[50:00] Andrew DeWolf: He's just this little cherubic little boy who's bringing all this energy and entertainment. He is obviously the youngest of the main cast, and I just, I want more. I wanted so much more of this little guy. And then the young woman who also played the Duke of Weselton is just the backup singer in that song and is out singing basically everyone on that point. I'm like, how, why are you the Duke of Wesselton?

[50:29] Jesse McAnally: Um, yeah, so go see your community theater. It'll be so much more entertaining, so much more engaging than going to spend a hundred dollars on anything a touring production around Broadway.

[50:43] Andrew DeWolf: So yes, that is my take. Go see community theater. You will have so much fun. And you will love those children so much and like have so much respect. Maybe it's better if you have a relative in the show. Don't just show up.

[50:54] Jesse McAnally: Yeah, have a relative in the child show. Or maybe a show.

[51:02] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah. Alright. Rose up. Let's see what they have to bring to me this week.

[51:10] Jesse McAnally: Then you meet them after and they're like, who the fuck is this guy? Schoolhouse Rocket. Let's go.

[51:15] Andrew DeWolf: You need to go in and like start acting like a snob, but halfway through you want to have your ratatouille moment.

[51:23] Jesse McAnally: Yes. You know? Yeah, that moment of realization. Crying, sobbing. You are part of the show now. You're like you are a performance art theater piece in the audience.

[51:34] Andrew DeWolf: See, then you have to come to every show.

[51:38] Jesse McAnally: I don't like it.

[51:40] Andrew DeWolf: I love it.

[51:43] Jesse McAnally: If I don't like what I'm seeing, I close my eyes.

[51:50] Andrew DeWolf: And I put my fingers on my ears and go, no no no no no no.

[51:58] Jesse McAnally: Okay, uh, Monster.

[52:00] Andrew DeWolf: Monster. Elsa got a new song. It's fine. I'm kinda sick of it. A lot of performers used it as audition songs. Pretty neat. Bored by the song, bored, like it comes in at the wrong point. Imagine if this ended act one. Like, after she like kicks out Elsa and does all this, she ends with this song about her becoming the monster. That sounds like a good act one closer to me.

[52:28] Jesse McAnally: Yeah. Yeah. No, I sort of agree. I mean, we've already talked about it to death. The structure of this show is all fucked up. It's all weird.

[52:37] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, but um, and you know what? I think the effect when Anna gets frozen's kind of cool. I like the wig development. Like the change in her wig to get it more white is pretty neat. Um, I don't know how they did it. There's a lot of special effects where I don't quite know how they did it. And then other ones where I'm just like, oh, you just doing the Peter Pan Sparkle effect and calling it snow. Cool.

[53:01] Jesse McAnally: Um, so what is our overall thoughts on Frozen the Musical NRC's ratings? Liz, you're first.

[53:08] Liz Eston: Why am I first all these episodes? Fine, Andrew, you're ch first. I don't give a shit. It's not a real show.

[53:13] Andrew DeWolf: That's okay. Um, so I think that this show, it could be good if they were willing to change up the structure of it. But they really bungled it. They really bungled this one up. Um, there's actually some pretty decent new songs, which is kind of, um, not fully unique, but a lot of these shows, like the newer songs that are just for the stage show are very, very forgettable and like lame. But this one actually has a couple that are like, alright, that's not bad. Um, they're just some of them are just in the wrong places. Like, I don't know why we have three new songs at the very beginning of the show when every child in the audience is begging you to play "Do You Want to Build a Snowman?" Because they went to see Frozen and they want to see Frozen Anna sing the Snowman song. You know, like so yeah.

[54:07] Jesse McAnally: Uh, I'm, I kind of feel like it's not good. I think I have to say it's not a good show. I don't recommend it. Watch the movie.

[54:17] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, we'll listen to some of the movie. Yeah. Listen to some of the new tracks, or as Jess is recommending, community theater apparently does a fun version of this show where they shorten it up a bit and maybe not fix the structure, but alleviate some of the effects of it.

[54:33] Jesse McAnally: Yes. Um, as far as a cheese rating, I'm gonna give it, I'm going to give it cheese that has been in the freezer too long. It's all, it's freezer burned. Uh, it's not good. You don't want to eat it.

[54:44] Andrew DeWolf: Um, fair enough. Liz, how about you?

[54:48] Liz Eston: Uh, this show's fine. Like it has parts that work, but it's structurally broken in many ways. Like, why does it take you 10 to 15 minutes to get to the one song the kids want to hear? Why does Act One feel like seven hours? Why does Act Two feel like a speed run of a movie? Like, there's a lot it can work, you just gotta fix it. So maybe just skip to go to the movie, watch community theater.

[55:17] Andrew DeWolf: But also I was once a viewer of the ABC show Once Upon a Time. And I watched, I was watching the Frozen arc live on ABC, and I'm going to share the actor that played Kristoff, who is very familiar to Jess.

[55:36] Jesse McAnally: Well, let's see who this is.

[55:39] Liz Eston: Okay. It's, oh no.

[55:42] Jesse McAnally: It's a craziest girlfriend guy.

[55:44] Liz Eston: Yeah. Yeah, Nathan from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend was Kristoff. Also, this is what the cast looked like. Um, it was some of the saddest shit you've ever seen on network television.

[55:54] Andrew DeWolf: Hans is, oh god. Hans is bad.

[55:57] Liz Eston: Hans is very bad, but Elsa's dress is worse somehow. So my girlfriend is watching through Once Upon a Time, and I've seen like two episodes, and every episode seems like the most insane shit I've ever seen on National. It's like reading fan, it's like watching fanfic, and I read fanfic because better structure. I read fanfic of this show, it's better structured than the actual show. But anyway, uh, so I partially can't take Frozen seriously because I watched Once Upon a Time back in like 2014, which is a year after the movie came out. Too soon, ABC.

[56:31] Jesse McAnally: So yeah, I can't take Frozen super seriously, but watch community theater of the show. It's fine. Um, it's probably fun when you watch cute little kids do it, make sure they're your family members, your friends though. Don't be a weirdo, don't be Jess in a turtleneck in the back of a theater.

[56:45] Andrew DeWolf: I like how that is now the narrative when that is 100% not what happens.

[56:48] Liz Eston: I know it's 100% not, but I think it's funny.

[56:51] Jesse McAnally: And it's a funny one.

[56:53] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, I'm going to give this show a string cheese that's been in a fridge for a little too long, so it's kind of cold.

[57:01] Liz Eston: You guys basically give the same.

[57:04] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, but it's string cheese.

[57:07] Jesse McAnally: The actual truth of Jess seeing the junior version that he doesn't want you to know is he was in a hoodie with a little camera.

[57:16] Andrew DeWolf: The next Frozen junior bootleg, you know the origin.

[57:21] Jesse McAnally: Don't worry, I just want to take a couple pictures. Someone walks up, he's like, are you filming this right now? And you're like, mind your own business.

[57:33] Andrew DeWolf: Jess almost did this at a Strange Loop, but we stopped him.

[57:36] Jesse McAnally: I, it's, he, it's comp, he's compulsive.

[57:39] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah.

[57:39] Jesse McAnally: You can't, you can't. We had to stop him. It's like, Jess, you paid 400 for these seats, and you're gonna, you're gonna try to film it with a, with a shitty camcorder. And he's like, he's like, I'm gonna get away with it too. And it's like, Jess, like what, like what you're doing. You're the only one wearing a hoodie of the four of us. Like we're all dressed up.

[58:05] Andrew DeWolf: I love the idea that I brought the hoodie, but I put it on over all the clothes I already had on.

[58:09] Jesse McAnally: So I just look extremely like, you know, bulky.

[58:16] Andrew DeWolf: You blend in more.

[58:17] Jesse McAnally: Well, you have to be bulky so you could have, you can store all the extra VHS tapes when you have to swap them during the show.

[58:26] Andrew DeWolf: Hold on, pause the movie. Rewind the play.

[58:31] Jesse McAnally: Is that why the guy got off the stage?

[58:33] Andrew DeWolf: I think I left because Jess is trying to teach VHS.

[58:38] Liz Eston: He had a Dorian Gray thing. Like footage cannot capture him.

[58:43] Andrew DeWolf: Until he was in a movie.

[58:45] Jesse McAnally: Well, they fixed it by then.

[58:47] Andrew DeWolf: Yeah, true. Um, bad. Cheese rating, no big frozen cheesecake.

[58:55] Jesse McAnally: Um, thank you guys for listening. Please follow us on iTunes and Spotify at Musicals with Cheese. We're on Twitter at Cheesy Beat Schools, Patreon Musical Cheese, Instagram Beauty Schools Cheese, YouTube Page Beast Schools Cheese, Patreon Light Podcast, Patreon Cheese. Email us at musicaltheatrelives@gmail.com.

[59:08] Andrew DeWolf: Our keeper of the cheese is Juliet Antonio. Here's some ASMR for you, Juliet. Cold bother.

[59:14] Jesse McAnally: This show is edited by Andrew the Wolf DeWolf. Thank you very much. Liz, thank you so much for your research and development while we record these. I'm so grateful you're here. Thank you to the Broadway Podcast Network for having us on the platform and for not kicking us off for, you know, sneaking in the Broadway plays that, you know, taking a couple pictures.

[59:34] Andrew DeWolf: Alright, anything else we have left to say before we wrap this up?

[59:38] Jesse McAnally: Love you all. You guys are great.

[59:40] Andrew DeWolf: You know what? I think y'all suck.

[59:50] ♪ Musical number: "For the First Time in Forever" — performed by Jesse McAnally ♪