This transcript was automatically generated and might contain errors.

[0:08] Iyvon Edebiri: Hello everyone. So welcome to the Parsnip Ship. My name is Iyvon E, and tonight is a special episode recording. We are here tonight to hear the commission play from our Radio Roots Writers Group. This is also coming out during our sixth season, which is featuring only queer playwrights and bringing their dynamic, colorful, all-around universal stories to you. We are recording, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We are recording tonight's reading live at the Mark O'Donnell Theater at the Entertainment Community Fund Art Center in downtown Brooklyn. Thank you as always for hosting us and supporting the Parsnip Ship. Tonight we are hearing AND THE ANSWER IS… by Gina Femia, directed by Estefanía Fadul, and our musician tonight is Henry Ryder.

Gina is part of our Radio Roots Writers Group, and after three years of development and pandemic delays, Gina's play is premiering here tonight. Y'all, this was to be done in June 2020. Like when we say we are committed to writers and people like Gina, we mean it. So yes, three years later, we're here.

[1:52] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey everyone. So so much of this play takes place in the two thousands, and so I thought I'd write some songs that sounded like the kind of music that I was listening to in the two thousands.

[2:27] ♪ Musical number: "Song Title" — performed by Akyiaa Wilson ♪

[5:52] Akyiaa Wilson: I'll be playing Alex.

[5:52] Jacqueline Guillen: Hi, I'm Jackie Guillen. I'll be playing Janelle and Voices.

[5:52] Reynaldo Piniella: What's up, I'm Reynaldo Piniella playing Warren and Voices?

[7:04] Alisha Espinosa: Hi, I'm Alicia Espinosa, I'll be playing Julie.

[7:07] Akyiaa Wilson: And the answer is by Gina Femia.

[7:24] Alisha Espinosa: Hello. This is Julie.

[7:26] Akyiaa Wilson: And Alex. Uh, welcome to the very first episode of AND THE ANSWER IS… The show that gives you answers to all life's questions. So if you're going to ask a question.

[7:37] Alisha Espinosa: I got an answer for you. Keep going.

[7:43] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. That's uh that's right, listener. Why look it up when you can ask us? Best friends you never knew you had. Your questions. And receive a sometimes earnest, sometimes sarcastic, but always very humorous response. Right, Julie?

[8:00] Alisha Espinosa: Uh yeah, Alex, for sure. We are very funny.

[8:05] Akyiaa Wilson: The funniest bitches on this camera.

[8:07] Alisha Espinosa: Wait, stop. Stop recording.

[8:10] Akyiaa Wilson: What what's wrong?

[8:12] Alisha Espinosa: It's not what we rehearsed. We have a script.

[8:15] Akyiaa Wilson: It's not a script, it's like blueprints.

[8:17] Alisha Espinosa: Then what? How am I supposed to know what to say?

[8:20] Akyiaa Wilson: It's banter.

[8:21] Alisha Espinosa: I'm not prepared to banter.

[8:23] Akyiaa Wilson: You kidding? This whole thing's supposed to be banter.

[8:25] Alisha Espinosa: But that's stupid.

[8:27] Akyiaa Wilson: It's fun, stupid, like Final Destination Three kind of stupid.

[8:33] Alisha Espinosa: Come on, Julie, it's for fun.

[8:35] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't have time for fun. It's the literal last month of school. I still got three papers to write.

[8:40] Alisha Espinosa: You already got those papers outlined.

[8:42] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, but I gotta write them.

[8:44] Alisha Espinosa: They're basically written, they're outlined.

[8:46] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't want to flunk freshman year.

[8:48] Alisha Espinosa: You need to have fun.

[8:50] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, and how's starting a radio show? Fun.

[8:53] Alisha Espinosa: It's fun, because it's with me. Alex, your best friend.

[9:01] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, don't touch me. You're all sweaty.

[9:05] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, it's hot in this dorm. Being in the closet doesn't help.

[9:10] Akyiaa Wilson: There's no air. We gotta record in the closet. It's the best sound quality.

[9:15] Alisha Espinosa: I'm so hot.

[9:16] Akyiaa Wilson: So drink water. The rest of the room's not much better anyway. Sun comes in first thing and roasts it.

[9:22] Alisha Espinosa: I'm not gonna miss it. At least you have a window. Pretty sure my room used to be a closet, like an actual closet.

[9:29] Akyiaa Wilson: Ugh, fucking May is gross. I smell like eggs.

[9:33] Alisha Espinosa: Smell me.

[9:34] Akyiaa Wilson: Stop! Get your armpit out of my face.

[9:41] Alisha Espinosa: Come on. We're funny. And we got good chemistry. People will fall in love with us.

[9:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Thought you said it's for fun.

[9:49] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, it's for fun. And it'll be even more fun when people start listening and sending us their stupid questions to answer.

[9:56] Akyiaa Wilson: I just, I don't know. I don't want to sound stupid.

[10:03] Alisha Espinosa: Julie, you're like the least stupid person who's ever existed in the entire billion-year history of the world.

[10:11] Akyiaa Wilson: That's an exaggeration.

[10:12] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, well, I do exaggerate, but also the exaggeration comes from a place of truth.

[10:19] Akyiaa Wilson: So it's true too. It's it's mostly true. It's just a little bigger.

[10:23] Alisha Espinosa: I don't know. You'll edit around the mistakes?

[10:29] Akyiaa Wilson: I'll make us both sound like the articulate queens we are.

[10:33] Alisha Espinosa: And it'll just be on the SUNY Albany website?

[10:36] Akyiaa Wilson: Swear.

[10:37] Alisha Espinosa: I swear.

[10:42] Akyiaa Wilson: Fine. Let's go again.

[10:44] Alisha Espinosa: Yes.

[10:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. Like what's written, though, or I swear to Christ.

[10:49] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, swear.

[10:51] Akyiaa Wilson: Just like that. Exactly how we practiced.

[11:03] Alisha Espinosa: Hey, I'm Julie.

[11:05] Akyiaa Wilson: And I'm Alex. Welcome to the very first episode of AND THE ANSWER IS… The show that gives you answers to all life's little and big questions.

[11:15] Alisha Espinosa: So if you've got a question to ask.

[11:18] Akyiaa Wilson: We've got an answer for you.

[11:21] Alisha Espinosa: Alright, so obviously this is our first episode. So we don't have any questions from our listeners because we don't have any listeners. Unless there are people from the future listening right now.

[11:34] Akyiaa Wilson: So, to start with, we turned to our good friend the internet and found a good survey with 10 random questions that we're gonna rapid fire at each other.

[11:44] Alisha Espinosa: Even though we already know all there is to know about each other, we're best friends.

[11:48] Akyiaa Wilson: We've only known each other for a year. Freshman year's basically a lifetime.

[11:52] Alisha Espinosa: Alright, alright, all right. Are you ready, Alex?

[11:55] Akyiaa Wilson: Julie, you are very well aware that my ass was born ready.

[11:59] Alisha Espinosa: Okay. Here we go.

[12:06] Akyiaa Wilson: What's your favorite color?

[12:08] Alisha Espinosa: Uh pink.

[12:10] Akyiaa Wilson: No yellow.

[12:11] Alisha Espinosa: No purple.

[12:12] Akyiaa Wilson: Purple. Purple is my final answer.

[12:15] Alisha Espinosa: I like green.

[12:16] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh shit, I forgot about green. Next question.

[12:20] Alisha Espinosa: Okay, right, okay. Um, if you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

[12:25] Akyiaa Wilson: Easy. My mom's rice and beans. And also hamburgers.

[12:28] Alisha Espinosa: Um, how do you take your coffee?

[12:30] Akyiaa Wilson: Iced and sweet. Hot coffee is gross.

[12:33] Alisha Espinosa: What's your favorite smell?

[12:35] Akyiaa Wilson: Fresh cut grass.

[12:36] Alisha Espinosa: Dogs or cats.

[12:37] Akyiaa Wilson: Dogs. They are the one pure thing in life.

[12:41] Alisha Espinosa: I like cats. Cats are fine, they're just not pure.

[12:44] Akyiaa Wilson: But if you could relive any year of your life, which one would you live?

[12:49] Alisha Espinosa: Uh, I guess it'd be the year that I was five because we went to Disney.

[12:52] Akyiaa Wilson: If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

[12:55] Alisha Espinosa: Easy, Brooklyn.

[12:56] Akyiaa Wilson: That's just where you live, though.

[12:57] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, exactly. And it's the best place on earth.

[12:58] Akyiaa Wilson: Where the hell would you live?

[13:02] Alisha Espinosa: If I could live anywhere, I'd live in a different country every year.

[13:06] Akyiaa Wilson: Sounds expensive.

[13:08] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, that's why it's a hypothetical question.

[13:10] Akyiaa Wilson: Fine, fine, fine, fine. What makes you laugh the most?

[13:14] Alisha Espinosa: Your dumbass does.

[13:15] Akyiaa Wilson: Yes!

[13:17] Alisha Espinosa: What's your biggest fear?

[13:18] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm not afraid of anything.

[13:20] Alisha Espinosa: Come on, there's gotta be something.

[13:22] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm afraid of ghosts.

[13:23] Alisha Espinosa: I'm not afraid of anything.

[13:25] Akyiaa Wilson: You can't not be afraid of anything.

[13:26] Alisha Espinosa: What?

[13:27] Akyiaa Wilson: I am invincible. I am an invincible bitch. Nothing can touch me, so I'm not afraid of anything.

[13:39] Akyiaa Wilson: Alright, so that's all the questions we got for each other today.

[13:43] Alisha Espinosa: Do you have a question you need an answer to?

[13:46] Akyiaa Wilson: Send us a message to, and the answer is at SUNYAlbany.edu, and we will get an answer for you.

[13:54] Alisha Espinosa: Happy ass asking.

[14:00] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay, fine. This is kind of fun.

[14:03] Alisha Espinosa: Told you. Do you think anyone's gonna actually listen?

[14:07] Akyiaa Wilson: Only one way to find out.

[14:15] Alisha Espinosa: This is from Georgie G at Yahoo.com. He asks, Hi Alex, I'm just curious. Why don't you think cats are pure? What would Princess Snowflake say if she heard you?

[14:28] Akyiaa Wilson: Uh first of all, I'd like to say, hi, Dad. And secondly, because they're evil. They're always out there plotting. And Princess Snowflake is the biggest plotter of all. Dogs can't plot, they're not that smart. And also, there better be a dog at home when I get home from break. Also, love you. Public service announcement. We will not be answering questions about our tits on this show. Go watch porn. And we don't want pics of your dicks. Alright.

[14:59] Alisha Espinosa: Wow, we got an actual question from Jay Anderson at SUNYAlbany.edu. Hey Julie, I'm a student at SUNY Albany too.

[15:09] Akyiaa Wilson: Makes sense since that's the only place we're posted. Go on.

[15:12] Alisha Espinosa: I'm getting ready for final exams, and I'm really nervous. I keep wanting to throw up diarrhea out of my ass.

[15:19] Akyiaa Wilson: Ew. And you're really smart, so I was wondering what's the best way to study.

[15:25] Alisha Espinosa: Just picture all the facts naked.

[15:28] Akyiaa Wilson: Wait, like on naked people, right? Here's a question from Est Delgado. A question from Dee Brady.

[15:35] Alisha Espinosa: Yes, we will be continuing through summer break. Episode four. Episode six. Why do we still celebrate the 4th of July? It's the worst. Hot dogs. Fried corn.

[15:46] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey Alex.

[15:47] Alisha Espinosa: Hi, Julie. From T Griffith. Our coal. Hi.

[15:50] Akyiaa Wilson: August is the worst month. Wait, why is the sky blue?

[15:54] Alisha Espinosa: I'll just edit. You'll just edit that out, right?

[15:56] Akyiaa Wilson: No, I never noticed that he had that mole, but now I can't unsee it.

[16:01] Alisha Espinosa: Oh my god. No, no, no. You've ruined Mr. Rogers for me.

[16:07] Akyiaa Wilson: Episode 12. Episode 13. Oh, our baby's a teenager. Centimeters for sure?

[16:13] Alisha Espinosa: Proven to be about eight ounces. Oh, uh, I think it was silver.

[16:17] Akyiaa Wilson: Definitely gold. You'll edit it out?

[16:19] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, yeah, don't worry. I'll edit it out.

[16:26] Akyiaa Wilson: It's September, which means we're back at SUNY Albany. And access to better sound equipment.

[16:32] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, thanks to Professor Weiss. Technically, thanks to me, Alex, communications major extraordinaire.

[16:38] Akyiaa Wilson: Thanks to you, listeners.

[16:40] Alisha Espinosa: Yes, listeners. Listeners, thank you. Thanks.

[16:43] Akyiaa Wilson: We now have a voicemail box. Call us! Leave us a voicemail. We're listening.

[16:50] Alisha Espinosa: Hi, Alex and Julie.

[16:52] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey, Julie and Alex. So I had this question. It might be pretty random.

[16:56] Alisha Espinosa: Okay, I know this is completely random, but I went to the movies with my friend recently, and he did something that I found totally weird. He sat a seat away from me. He called it a buffer seat. I never heard of this before. Is this a normal thing that I just haven't heard of before?

[17:13] Akyiaa Wilson: Ew. I've literally never heard of a buffer seat.

[17:16] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, what the hell is that? When I go to the movies with Julie, I usually want to sit in her lap.

[17:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Stop. Well, who wouldn't want to do that? You're the best person I've ever known. Most beautiful, too.

[17:29] Alisha Espinosa: Oh. Uh. Sorry, I'll just edit.

[17:33] Akyiaa Wilson: No, but don't worry. I'll edit it out. No, it's just nothing.

[17:37] Alisha Espinosa: What? Never mind. But Alex, do you think I'll just edit it out?

[17:44] Akyiaa Wilson: I'll edit it out. Just just pretend like I never.

[17:49] Alisha Espinosa: Okay. Hi, Julian Alex! This is Jenny from SUNY Albany, and since Halloween is like right around the corner, I was just kind of wondering what was the world's first Halloween costume? What was your first Halloween costume? What are you going as for Halloween?

[18:06] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm going as the pale man from Pan's Labyrinth.

[18:10] Alisha Espinosa: That's so niche.

[18:11] Akyiaa Wilson: I know. Well, I'll be going as queer and single.

[18:16] Alisha Espinosa: How's that any different than from every day of your life?

[18:19] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't got time for a costume, but I got time to be me. So if you see me at a Halloween party, don't be shy. Come up, say hi. Hit me up.

[18:29] Alisha Espinosa: God, Alex.

[18:30] Akyiaa Wilson: What?

[18:31] Alisha Espinosa: Just edit that out.

[18:32] Akyiaa Wilson: What? Why?

[18:34] Alisha Espinosa: Do you sound thirsty?

[18:35] Akyiaa Wilson: That's because I am thirsty.

[18:39] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, uh. Okay.

[18:50] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm gonna edit it out.

[18:51] Alisha Espinosa: No, it's it's funny. Keep it in.

[18:54] Akyiaa Wilson: You sure? Why is Thanksgiving a different day every year, but always a Thursday? Did Christopher Columbus celebrate Thanksgiving?

[19:02] Alisha Espinosa: Hi, Alex and Julie. First time, long time. Anyway. My mom is making pies for Thanksgiving this year, and she said her grandmother told her that it's inappropriate to make blueberry pie. Because that's a spring pie, not an autumn pie. Is that true? Do pies have seasons?

[19:20] Akyiaa Wilson: What is the winter solstice? And does it contribute to global warming? Why doesn't Australia have the same winter as us? That's just weird. Why are you supposed to kiss someone at midnight? Is it unlucky if you don't kiss anybody at midnight? Do you have anyone to kiss at midnight? Who are you gonna kiss at midnight? So who are you gonna kiss at midnight?

[19:36] Alisha Espinosa: Huh? I'm just do you have someone?

[19:42] Akyiaa Wilson: You know I don't. Do you have someone who you like, I don't know, want it to be?

[19:49] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, I uh why are you are you asking for a Oh no, no, of course not. No, I just thought it would be uh fun to end with.

[19:59] Akyiaa Wilson: Right, right, right. Fun. It's okay. You can uh just edit that out.

[20:04] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, I'll just edit that.

[20:07] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. Aren't you going to ask me?

[20:14] Alisha Espinosa: I uh we should finish this up.

[20:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Right, of course. Of course.

[20:27] Alisha Espinosa: And that's a wrap on this season of And the ANSWER IS. We'll be taking a break for winter, but you can bet your ass we'll be back with the freshest of content in 2007.

[20:39] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey listeners, thank you for listening, and thank you for your questions. We literally wouldn't have a show if it weren't for all of you.

[20:47] Alisha Espinosa: Thanks for a great Oh god, sorry.

[20:53] Akyiaa Wilson: Sorry! Fuck, Julie.

[20:54] Alisha Espinosa: I know I'm sorry. This is like the tenth time.

[20:57] Akyiaa Wilson: It's not.

[20:58] Alisha Espinosa: It is.

[20:59] Akyiaa Wilson: Turn it off.

[20:59] Alisha Espinosa: I can't just turn it off. Last time I turned it off, it didn't turn back on.

[21:03] Akyiaa Wilson: Can we like put it in the hall?

[21:05] Alisha Espinosa: No, Alex, I'm not putting my phone in the hallway. Jesus. You know they make some of them that can go silent now.

[21:12] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, well, this one can either turn off or vibrate. That's it. We can put it in my laundry.

[21:17] Alisha Espinosa: Ew, Alex.

[21:18] Akyiaa Wilson: What? Your dirty laundry?

[21:20] Alisha Espinosa: It's only a little bit dirty. Let me just read.

[21:24] Akyiaa Wilson: Fucking hurry. I've got class in like 15 minutes, and we gotta get these pickups recorded before break.

[21:29] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, yeah, I know. I know.

[21:34] Akyiaa Wilson: Wait, are you smiling?

[21:36] Alisha Espinosa: No.

[21:37] Akyiaa Wilson: You are so smiling.

[21:39] Alisha Espinosa: You're smiling.

[21:40] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm not. You're is that a blush I see upon your cheeks?

[21:46] Alisha Espinosa: No.

[21:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Julie Torres, do not tell me no. I see you blushing. You are blushing.

[21:52] Alisha Espinosa: Shut up, Alex.

[21:53] Akyiaa Wilson: What is making you blush? And why don't I know about it?

[21:56] Alisha Espinosa: Nothing. Let me see. Let me see.

[21:58] Akyiaa Wilson: No, stop. Alex.

[22:02] Alisha Espinosa: Alex, come on.

[22:05] Akyiaa Wilson: Janelle? Who the fuck is Janelle? And why the hell is she making you blush?

[22:12] Alisha Espinosa: Because. I don't know.

[22:16] Akyiaa Wilson: Julie, why is a girl named Janelle making your ass blush? Do you have a crush?

[22:21] Alisha Espinosa: No. Who is she?

[22:22] Akyiaa Wilson: Just someone in an art history class with me.

[22:26] Alisha Espinosa: Okay. What?

[22:29] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't know. Nothing.

[22:31] Alisha Espinosa: Okay. I guess. I guess I don't trust someone with so many L's in their name.

[22:41] Akyiaa Wilson: We both.

[22:44] Alisha Espinosa: We both have L's in our names.

[22:46] Akyiaa Wilson: Mmm, a single L each.

[22:49] Alisha Espinosa: That's a decent amount of L's.

[22:52] Akyiaa Wilson: Two?

[22:52] Alisha Espinosa: I don't know about that.

[22:54] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. You're acting weird.

[22:58] Alisha Espinosa: I don't think I am.

[22:59] Akyiaa Wilson: Alright. I think I am acting normal.

[23:02] Alisha Espinosa: Right. Because I'm being normal.

[23:09] Akyiaa Wilson: Do you want to try recording the ending again?

[23:12] Alisha Espinosa: I actually I think we got it. We're good.

[23:15] Akyiaa Wilson: You sure?

[23:18] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, for sure. I've got class soon anyway, so.

[23:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, me too. One more class before break.

[23:23] Alisha Espinosa: Cool.

[23:23] Akyiaa Wilson: Two more for me, but yeah, cool.

[23:31] Alisha Espinosa: Hey, so it's our 50th episode soon.

[23:34] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, I know. That's wild. Can't believe we've actually recorded 50 of these things.

[23:39] Alisha Espinosa: I think.

[23:40] Akyiaa Wilson: And don't say no.

[23:42] Alisha Espinosa: Uh oh. Okay, just hear me out.

[23:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay, so we are very popular here.

[23:48] Alisha Espinosa: I guess.

[23:49] Akyiaa Wilson: We are, and I've been doing some research.

[23:51] Alisha Espinosa: Research.

[23:51] Akyiaa Wilson: Yes, about podcasts.

[23:54] Alisha Espinosa: What's a podcast?

[23:56] Akyiaa Wilson: It's like a radio show, but different.

[23:59] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, but this is a radio show.

[24:01] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, but actually it's more like a podcast. And there's a way we can like package them and put them up on Apple, right?

[24:10] Alisha Espinosa: Package?

[24:10] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, it don't worry about it. It's all tech stuff, but basically, I can put them up on Apple and then people can download them and shit.

[24:19] Alisha Espinosa: But people can listen on the SUNY Albany site.

[24:22] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, but this would be beyond SUNY Albany. Literally, the only questions we get right now are from students, professors, and our parents. Don't you want them from strangers in like Albuquerque and Alaska and shit?

[24:33] Alisha Espinosa: Who the hell outside of this place is gonna listen to a dumbass radio show?

[24:37] Akyiaa Wilson: Podcasts.

[24:39] Alisha Espinosa: Podcast like this.

[24:42] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't know. A lot of people, probably. People really like it.

[24:46] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, they like it here because it's a bunch of inside jokes.

[24:50] Akyiaa Wilson: Our jokes are universal. And like, are strangers even gonna call in? We've been getting some really good questions here, and I bet even more people would have even bigger and wilder questions.

[25:00] Alisha Espinosa: I don't know, Alex. This is supposed to just be fun.

[25:04] Akyiaa Wilson: And it'll be more fun, I think. It'll be even more fun because we'll be getting a broader range of stupid questions, and we can be funnier and funnier. And how long can something like this possibly last?

[25:16] Alisha Espinosa: I don't know. But we can try for as long as we can, right?

[25:29] Akyiaa Wilson: What?

[25:31] Alisha Espinosa: Nothing. I just you a great smile.

[25:35] Akyiaa Wilson: Thanks, Alex. What did she say?

[25:41] Alisha Espinosa: Nothing. Just wants to know if I want to get Chipotle.

[25:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh. You gonna go?

[25:49] Alisha Espinosa: I am hungry. So hey, so I'll see you at Lulupete's party Friday.

[26:02] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm leaving Friday.

[26:03] Alisha Espinosa: Since when?

[26:04] Akyiaa Wilson: Bus tickets were cheaper, so Oh. So I guess I won't see you until 2007.

[26:13] Alisha Espinosa: Years that end in seven, give me the creeps.

[26:15] Akyiaa Wilson: That's so random. There's something evil about them.

[26:17] Alisha Espinosa: Sevens are lucky numbers.

[26:18] Akyiaa Wilson: Sevens are crooked. Nothing lucky about them.

[26:21] Alisha Espinosa: What are you doing for New Year's?

[26:23] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't know. Probably wait for it on the roof, see if there are any fireworks.

[26:28] Alisha Espinosa: I'll miss you, Alex.

[26:30] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, I'll miss you too. Can you just Oh, you are my best friend.

[26:36] Alisha Espinosa: Julie, I don't wanna What I gotta get to class.

[26:43] Akyiaa Wilson: I'll see you.

[26:44] Alisha Espinosa: See you in 2007.

[26:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay.

[26:49] Alisha Espinosa: Okay.

[26:57] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh god. I cannot wait to eat this burrito.

[27:00] Alisha Espinosa: I know it smells so gross and great.

[27:02] Akyiaa Wilson: Right? This place smells like heaven right now. My mom would lose her shit if she knew, calls it fake junk food.

[27:08] Akyiaa Wilson: But honestly, that's why I love it.

[27:10] Alisha Espinosa: Right? That's the point. It's like McDonald's. That shit isn't a real burger, but goddamn, I love it.

[27:15] Akyiaa Wilson: Together.

[27:16] Alisha Espinosa: Uh yes.

[27:16] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, wait.

[27:17] Alisha Espinosa: Okay, cool. That'll be 2276.

[27:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Uh yeah.

[27:22] Alisha Espinosa: Uh okay, here. Let me just— No, no, that's I got it.

[27:25] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh no.

[27:26] Alisha Espinosa: You don't have to.

[27:27] Akyiaa Wilson: No, I insist.

[27:28] Alisha Espinosa: Shit. I wouldn't have gotten the guac if I knew you were gonna pay for it.

[27:31] Akyiaa Wilson: It's fine. I wanted to. That's why I said I insist.

[27:35] Alisha Espinosa: Because insisting and stuff.

[27:38] Akyiaa Wilson: But why?

[27:41] Alisha Espinosa: Because that's what you do when you're on a date.

[27:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, is this— I mean, I thought.

[27:51] Alisha Espinosa: I uh— Oh.

[27:54] Akyiaa Wilson: Dude, this is a Chipotle.

[27:56] Alisha Espinosa: No.

[27:57] Akyiaa Wilson: I uh— Yeah.

[27:59] Alisha Espinosa: Chipotle.

[28:00] Akyiaa Wilson: Right. Have a nice day. Chipotle.

[28:04] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah. Um.

[28:06] Akyiaa Wilson: So I know this is a Chipotle or whatever, but like I also kind of thought it was a date.

[28:16] Alisha Espinosa: No, I— you want this to be a date?

[28:22] Akyiaa Wilson: Yes.

[28:25] Alisha Espinosa: With me?

[28:28] Akyiaa Wilson: Is that a real question?

[28:31] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, yes, with you.

[28:33] Akyiaa Wilson: I mean, okay, I know Chipotle isn't like the most ideal place for a date, but also like it's also not the worst.

[28:43] Alisha Espinosa: This is not a date.

[28:45] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh.

[28:47] Alisha Espinosa: Okay. This is a Chipotle. This is lunch. This is not a date.

[28:53] Akyiaa Wilson: But Blue Moon at like 7 p.m. That can be a date.

[28:59] Alisha Espinosa: Really?

[29:00] Akyiaa Wilson: I insist.

[29:03] Alisha Espinosa: Chipotle and Blue Moon in the same day, though. I don't know, that's risky.

[29:08] Akyiaa Wilson: With the farts and all.

[29:11] Alisha Espinosa: I like living on the edge.

[29:14] Akyiaa Wilson: Besides, it's either like that or a cheesecake factory or Applebee's, and those are more third and fourth types of dates.

[29:22] Alisha Espinosa: Okay, yes. Yes, let's.

[29:25] Akyiaa Wilson: I wanna eat at Blue Moon with you tonight.

[29:28] Alisha Espinosa: Yes.

[29:29] Akyiaa Wilson: Great. Then it's a date.

[29:33] Alisha Espinosa: It's a date. With you.

[29:42] Akyiaa Wilson: What's up, you cool cats and kittens?

[29:44] Alisha Espinosa: I thought you said you don't like cats or kittens.

[29:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey, no, okay. Let me set the record straight. Cats are fine. They're just evil.

[29:53] Alisha Espinosa: Oh god, whatever. Happy 2007.

[29:56] Akyiaa Wilson: Happy New Year all. And welcome to our 50th— 50th episode.

[30:00] Alisha Espinosa: Our podcast is now old enough to be Fran Drescher.

[30:05] Akyiaa Wilson: Or Katie Couric.

[30:08] Alisha Espinosa: Or Gloria Estefan.

[30:11] Akyiaa Wilson: Who are all women turning 50 this year in 2007?

[30:14] Alisha Espinosa: Yes, our podcast's older and wiser than ever before.

[30:19] Akyiaa Wilson: Hell yeah.

[30:20] Alisha Espinosa: And with a new year comes a new announcement.

[30:27] Akyiaa Wilson: What the hell is that?

[30:28] Alisha Espinosa: A drum roll, duh.

[30:31] Akyiaa Wilson: It sounds like you need to go to drum roll school.

[30:34] Alisha Espinosa: You do it then.

[30:35] Akyiaa Wilson: Uh, the person doing the announcing can't do the drum roll.

[30:39] Alisha Espinosa: Then this is what you get.

[30:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. Fine, fine. This announcement does deserve a drum roll, so.

[30:52] Alisha Espinosa: And the answer is now available for download on Apple.

[30:58] Akyiaa Wilson: Yes, SUNY Albany, you've been great, and we hope you keep listening.

[31:03] Alisha Espinosa: But now we're spreading our wings and flying a little higher.

[31:07] Akyiaa Wilson: So if you've got a grandma in Florida or a friend studying abroad in Prague, and you think me and Julie are great, then go ahead and tell them we're available for download on Apple.

[31:18] Alisha Espinosa: And as always, if you've got a question to ask, we've got an answer for you.

[31:25] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, yeah!

[31:26] Alisha Espinosa: Alex and Julie!

[31:27] Akyiaa Wilson: First time calling, calling in from snowy Michigan!

[31:30] Alisha Espinosa: From Long Island.

[31:31] Akyiaa Wilson: Sunny Los Angeles, California.

[31:32] Alisha Espinosa: Harris, Texas.

[31:33] Akyiaa Wilson: Boston.

[31:34] Alisha Espinosa: Reppin' Brooklyn!

[31:35] Akyiaa Wilson: Brooklyn!

[31:36] Alisha Espinosa: And I was just wondering.

[31:37] Akyiaa Wilson: Just wanted to know.

[31:38] Alisha Espinosa: How can you?

[31:39] Akyiaa Wilson: Did you ever— proven fact?

[31:42] Alisha Espinosa: Even when you're not in Albany in the middle of the winter, January is still the most depressing month on the face of the earth.

[31:48] Akyiaa Wilson: Negative 35 degrees Celsius.

[31:50] Alisha Espinosa: The moon.

[31:51] Akyiaa Wilson: Your brother sounds like a tool.

[31:52] Alisha Espinosa: Sounds like your mom just misses you.

[31:54] Akyiaa Wilson: Call her up.

[31:55] Alisha Espinosa: It's bad for the planet.

[31:57] Akyiaa Wilson: I love a ham sandwich.

[31:58] Alisha Espinosa: Truly it's bullshit.

[32:00] Akyiaa Wilson: Bullshit.

[32:00] Alisha Espinosa: Bullshit.

[32:02] Akyiaa Wilson: Celebrating 12 downloads.

[32:04] Alisha Espinosa: 20 downloads?

[32:05] Akyiaa Wilson: We've reached 35 downloads.

[32:07] Alisha Espinosa: Ask us your questions.

[32:08] Akyiaa Wilson: Ask.

[32:08] Alisha Espinosa: Ask.

[32:09] Akyiaa Wilson: Hi, Alex and Julie.

[32:11] Alisha Espinosa: I'm hoping that you can settle a dispute that I've been having with my boyfriend.

[32:14] Akyiaa Wilson: My girlfriend really wants to celebrate Valentine's Day, but I'm like, babe, that shit is bad.

[32:19] Alisha Espinosa: But like, I just want him to show me that he loves me.

[32:22] Akyiaa Wilson: It was invented as another reason for her to get mad at me.

[32:25] Alisha Espinosa: And he knows that I'm gonna get mad at him if he doesn't do it.

[32:29] Akyiaa Wilson: So why doesn't he just do it?

[32:31] Alisha Espinosa: I can get her chocolate any day of the week.

[32:33] Akyiaa Wilson: Why does it have to be Valentine's Day?

[32:35] Alisha Espinosa: Everyone knows that Valentine's Day is just a day that's created by Hallmark companies and flower corporations to sell products in the middle of a depressing month.

[32:45] Akyiaa Wilson: But if you've got someone special in your life that you want to celebrate, then it might be a good way to tell that person that you care by buying them some flowers or some chocolate in a box or something like that.

[32:56] Alisha Espinosa: What?

[32:57] Akyiaa Wilson: Maybe even take them out for dinner.

[33:00] Alisha Espinosa: Go out to dinner on Valentine's Day?

[33:03] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. First up, A, how cliché, and B, good luck getting reservations.

[33:08] Alisha Espinosa: You can get reservations if you do it in advance.

[33:10] Akyiaa Wilson: What?

[33:11] Alisha Espinosa: What are you doing on Valentine's Day?

[33:13] Akyiaa Wilson: I've got a date.

[33:14] Alisha Espinosa: You?

[33:16] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah.

[33:16] Alisha Espinosa: Have a date.

[33:22] Akyiaa Wilson: Yes.

[33:32] Alisha Espinosa: With uh who?

[33:36] Akyiaa Wilson: With Janelle.

[33:36] Alisha Espinosa: With Janelle.

[33:42] Akyiaa Wilson: Yup.

[33:43] Alisha Espinosa: And all her elves.

[33:45] Akyiaa Wilson: Mm-hmm.

[33:47] Alisha Espinosa: Well, well.

[33:51] Akyiaa Wilson: Well.

[33:52] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, shut up.

[33:55] Akyiaa Wilson: Why?

[33:55] Alisha Espinosa: What are you doing?

[33:56] Akyiaa Wilson: Being queer and single by yourself?

[33:58] Alisha Espinosa: Newsflash, Julie. Valentine's Day wasn't made for us.

[34:02] Akyiaa Wilson: It's for straight people.

[34:04] Alisha Espinosa: Okay. I'll tell that to Janelle when I see her on our Valentine's date.

[34:12] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm gonna hang out with Warren in the dining hall. It's peanut butter and banana pizza day, so.

[34:18] Alisha Espinosa: Every other Friday is peanut butter and banana pizza day.

[34:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Exactly. And that's just what Valentine's Day is. Another day, a Friday, in fact.

[34:26] Alisha Espinosa: Well, have fun with Warren then.

[34:29] Akyiaa Wilson: Great, I will.

[34:31] Alisha Espinosa: Wait, where are you going?

[34:32] Akyiaa Wilson: I gotta get ready for my date.

[34:34] Alisha Espinosa: Valentine's Day is not for a week.

[34:35] Akyiaa Wilson: I know. I got one tonight, too.

[34:38] Alisha Espinosa: Oh.

[34:38] Akyiaa Wilson: Yep.

[34:39] Alisha Espinosa: I didn't know.

[34:40] Akyiaa Wilson: Obviously.

[34:41] Alisha Espinosa: You didn't tell me.

[34:42] Akyiaa Wilson: You didn't ask.

[34:43] Alisha Espinosa: Okay.

[34:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Well.

[34:46] Alisha Espinosa: Okay.

[34:48] Akyiaa Wilson: That's okay. It's just we need to finish recording this one before next week.

[34:55] Alisha Espinosa: Lots of people have been asking their dumb questions about Valentine's Day. Gotta get our special Valentine's Day episode out, you know?

[35:02] Akyiaa Wilson: I already gave my answer.

[35:03] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, but we're not like done with it.

[35:05] Akyiaa Wilson: I am.

[35:06] Alisha Espinosa: We got other shit to answer.

[35:08] Akyiaa Wilson: You gonna keep being mad at me for hanging out with someone, or are you gonna do something about it?

[35:12] Alisha Espinosa: What am I supposed to do about it?

[35:13] Akyiaa Wilson: Really?

[35:19] Alisha Espinosa: We can finish recording tomorrow if you've got time.

[35:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah.

[35:22] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah.

[35:22] Akyiaa Wilson: I really do gotta go now, though. I need to get ready.

[35:24] Alisha Espinosa: You already look good.

[35:26] Akyiaa Wilson: I gotta do my makeup and hair and shit.

[35:28] Alisha Espinosa: You're beautiful.

[35:29] Akyiaa Wilson: Stop.

[35:30] Alisha Espinosa: Got that smile shining out of your eyes.

[35:32] Akyiaa Wilson: Don't say it if you don't mean it.

[35:34] Alisha Espinosa: But I do mean it.

[35:35] Akyiaa Wilson: Then don't say it. Just don't say it.

[35:38] Alisha Espinosa: I can't. I gotta get going.

[35:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Julie, wait.

[35:51] Alisha Espinosa: Fuck.

[35:54] Akyiaa Wilson: Fuck me like a duck.

[35:59] Alisha Espinosa: Shit.

[36:01] Akyiaa Wilson: Uh.

[36:04] Alisha Espinosa: Uh yeah.

[36:05] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey, Alex.

[36:07] Alisha Espinosa: I got a quick question.

[36:10] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm in love with my best friend, and I don't know what the fuck I can do about it.

[36:16] Alisha Espinosa: Well, listener, I don't know.

[36:20] Akyiaa Wilson: Seems to me like you only got a few options.

[36:24] Alisha Espinosa: Option one, you do nothing.

[36:27] Akyiaa Wilson: Kinda like what you've been doing.

[36:29] Alisha Espinosa: Like exactly what you've been doing.

[36:31] Akyiaa Wilson: And you can ignore the smell of her hair and the way her smile makes your belly button feel like it's been set on fire.

[36:39] Alisha Espinosa: And nothing has to change.

[36:41] Akyiaa Wilson: Or, option two, you can profess your love to her.

[36:47] Alisha Espinosa: Date her.

[36:48] Akyiaa Wilson: Have it be a dream because the two of you are best friends.

[36:51] Alisha Espinosa: Date so hard that you eventually fall out of love with her and break up, breaking your heart and her heart in the process.

[37:01] Akyiaa Wilson: Or maybe you can turn your heart off.

[37:05] Alisha Espinosa: Like it's a faucet that's gushing love.

[37:09] Akyiaa Wilson: You can just turn that shit off and make it stop, and the love can, I don't know, dissipate back inside of you.

[37:21] Alisha Espinosa: And maybe it'll be like you never loved her to begin with.

[37:25] Akyiaa Wilson: Never loved her in the first place or at all.

[37:28] Alisha Espinosa: Maybe hearts can work like that.

[37:36] Akyiaa Wilson: Damn.

[37:39] Alisha Espinosa: I wish hearts could work like that.

[37:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey, Julie.

[37:45] Alisha Espinosa: Hi, Alex.

[37:46] Akyiaa Wilson: Alex.

[37:47] Alisha Espinosa: Julie.

[37:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Julie!

[37:48] Alisha Espinosa: Alex!

[37:49] Akyiaa Wilson: Why?

[37:49] Alisha Espinosa: Why?

[37:50] Akyiaa Wilson: Why?

[37:52] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, uh.

[37:53] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't know.

[37:54] Alisha Espinosa: Not sure.

[37:55] Akyiaa Wilson: Let's take it to the— my research.

[37:58] Alisha Espinosa: I see.

[37:58] Akyiaa Wilson: Paulin.

[37:59] Alisha Espinosa: Allergies.

[38:00] Akyiaa Wilson: Spring break!

[38:01] Alisha Espinosa: Spring forward.

[38:01] Akyiaa Wilson: Easter Sunday.

[38:02] Alisha Espinosa: Passover.

[38:03] Akyiaa Wilson: Don't forget to rate us.

[38:04] Alisha Espinosa: Five stars.

[38:05] Akyiaa Wilson: Five stars.

[38:06] Alisha Espinosa: Two stars.

[38:06] Akyiaa Wilson: You ever wondered?

[38:07] Alisha Espinosa: Just want to know why.

[38:08] Akyiaa Wilson: Why?

[38:09] Alisha Espinosa: Why?

[38:09] Akyiaa Wilson: May the fourth be with me.

[38:12] Alisha Espinosa: So nice out.

[38:14] Akyiaa Wilson: Don't forget to rate.

[38:15] Alisha Espinosa: Great, great, great.

[38:16] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey, Julie Baby.

[38:18] Alisha Espinosa: Just wanted to say hi, and that I think you're doing a great job.

[38:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Can you tell her?

[38:23] Alisha Espinosa: Girlfriend, not James.

[38:25] Akyiaa Wilson: Didn't ask a question.

[38:26] Alisha Espinosa: What she's supposed to ask.

[38:27] Akyiaa Wilson: Why haven't I met Alex?

[38:29] Alisha Espinosa: Alex.

[38:29] Akyiaa Wilson: When can I meet Alex?

[38:31] Alisha Espinosa: Alex.

[38:32] Akyiaa Wilson: Isn't Alex your best friend?

[38:34] Alisha Espinosa: Alex.

[38:34] Akyiaa Wilson: What?

[38:35] Alisha Espinosa: Why?

[38:36] Akyiaa Wilson: Why?

[38:36] Alisha Espinosa: Why?

[38:37] Akyiaa Wilson: Why?

[38:38] Alisha Espinosa: Finals.

[38:38] Akyiaa Wilson: Alex?

[38:39] Alisha Espinosa: Why do we— fine.

[38:40] Akyiaa Wilson: Soon?

[38:40] Alisha Espinosa: Summer break's soon.

[38:42] Akyiaa Wilson: I'll meet her soon.

[38:43] Alisha Espinosa: Soon.

[38:43] Akyiaa Wilson: Soon!

[38:44] Alisha Espinosa: Soon.

[38:44] Akyiaa Wilson: Soon.

[38:46] Alisha Espinosa: It's September.

[38:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Junior year.

[38:48] Alisha Espinosa: Getting colder.

[38:49] Akyiaa Wilson: It's October.

[38:50] Alisha Espinosa: Love you, Julie Baby.

[38:51] Akyiaa Wilson: It's getting colder.

[38:52] Alisha Espinosa: It's November.

[38:53] Akyiaa Wilson: Getting colder.

[38:54] Alisha Espinosa: It's December.

[38:55] Akyiaa Wilson: 2008.

[38:56] Alisha Espinosa: It's February.

[38:57] Akyiaa Wilson: I love you, Julie Baby.

[38:58] Alisha Espinosa: It's March.

[38:59] Akyiaa Wilson: It's April.

[39:00] Alisha Espinosa: It's May.

[39:08] Akyiaa Wilson: And that's a wrap for this season of And the ANSWER IS.

[39:13] Alisha Espinosa: Like last year, we will be taking a break for the summer.

[39:16] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, we need to rehydrate, replenish.

[39:19] Alisha Espinosa: And I'll be in France for most of it. Drinking wine and eating croissants.

[39:24] Akyiaa Wilson: Uh, more like working at the Louvre and eating cheese.

[39:27] Alisha Espinosa: But we just wanted to thank you, listeners and question askers.

[39:31] Akyiaa Wilson: We wouldn't have a show if it wasn't for all of you.

[39:33] Alisha Espinosa: Thank you for helping us to keep our curiosity alive.

[39:36] Akyiaa Wilson: You, Julie?

[39:38] Alisha Espinosa: What?

[39:38] Akyiaa Wilson: That's mad corny.

[39:40] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, come on. Think of something else.

[39:42] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm gonna edit that out.

[39:43] Alisha Espinosa: Fine. Thank you for sharing your questions with us.

[39:47] Akyiaa Wilson: We're honored to help you find your answers.

[39:50] Alisha Espinosa: Good. See you in the fall.

[39:55] Akyiaa Wilson: And that's a wrap.

[39:57] Alisha Espinosa: We did it!

[39:58] Akyiaa Wilson: Another year, damn.

[40:00] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, by the way, I got us a Twitter.

[40:02] Akyiaa Wilson: A what?

[40:03] Alisha Espinosa: Twitter.

[40:06] Akyiaa Wilson: What's that?

[40:07] Alisha Espinosa: It's like this website where you can send out little blurbs to people to get them interested in stuff.

[40:13] Akyiaa Wilson: Like celebrities are using it, like Kim Kardashian and Miley Cyrus and shit.

[40:17] Alisha Espinosa: Who?

[40:18] Akyiaa Wilson: Not important.

[40:20] Alisha Espinosa: Basically, it's just another way to like get our shit out there.

[40:23] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm gonna set it up over the summer, sending out some messages about our older episodes.

[40:27] Alisha Espinosa: Try to keep building us up while you're in France and shit.

[40:31] Akyiaa Wilson: Alright, sounds good.

[40:32] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah.

[40:33] Akyiaa Wilson: When do you head out?

[40:34] Alisha Espinosa: In a couple of days. Gonna just fly out of the Albany Airport.

[40:38] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah. Makes more sense than going all the way back to Miami and then out to Paris.

[40:42] Alex: Your mom's cool with not seeing you?

[40:44] Julie: Yeah, she's cool with it. I mean, there's Skype now. It's not like we can't talk to each other, you know.

[40:49] Alex: For sure, for sure. Janelle must be excited about that.

[40:53] Julie: Uh yeah, sure. She's gonna come out and visit you?

[40:56] Alex: I don't think so.

[40:58] Julie: Why?

[40:58] Alex: It's only the most romantic city in the universe.

[41:01] Julie: Because I don't want her to.

[41:04] Alex: Oh.

[41:05] Julie: Yeah.

[41:09] Alex: All right. Well, I'm heading out to Big Jake's party.

[41:12] Julie: That's cool. You sure you don't want to come win?

[41:15] Alex: Nah, I can't. I need to edit these episodes, get them ready. Got a plan to distribute them over the next few weeks, and still got some intros to fix on them and stuff like that.

[41:26] Julie: Come on, it's a party. Who's not having fun now?

[41:28] Alex: Me. I don't wanna. Just wanna make sure the podcast is gonna be ready.

[41:33] Julie: Come on, it's not that big a deal.

[41:34] Alex: Well, this podcast's a part of my thesis now, so actually, it's the definition of a big deal. I want you there.

[41:43] Julie: Well, I can't. I can't. I gotta—are you—never mind.

[41:48] Alex: What?

[41:49] Julie: You seem agitated.

[41:52] Alex: Agitated?

[41:53] Julie: Yeah.

[41:54] Alex: No, I am not agitated.

[41:58] Julie: Okay. Why would I be that?

[42:01] Alex: I don't know. It's just what you seem. I got work to do, and you got a party to get to. I'm sure Janelle's waiting.

[42:07] Julie: I want you to come with me.

[42:09] Alex: Why? What's the point?

[42:11] Julie: And I want you to be the person I Skype with from Paris.

[42:14] Alex: Obviously, we'll do that anyway. My phone doesn't have a long distance.

[42:17] Julie: And I want you to be the one I walk down the streets of Paris with. I want you to visit me for us to see the Eiffel Tower and get swept up in whatever romantic shit goes on in Paris to make it the most romantic place on Earth.

[42:28] Alex: Yeah. Well, I can't afford a ticket to Paris.

[42:33] Julie: That's not what I mean. And you know it.

[42:42] Alex: Never mind. I gotta go. Are you coming?

[42:55] Julie: I'm waiting.

[42:59] Alex: I don't know.

[43:00] Julie: Great. Well, I'm going.

[43:03] Alex: Great. Well, have fun in Paris or whatever. See you whenever.

[43:13] Julie: Wait.

[43:14] Alex: Yeah?

[43:17] Julie: If we need to do pickups, can you make Thursday work?

[43:20] Alex: God damn it, Alex. Why are you making it so I can't run to you?

[43:23] Julie: Where am I supposed to go?

[43:29] Alex: Me. Come to me.

[43:43] Julie: Hi all. This is Alex with And the ANSWER IS—we're no.

[43:50] Alex: No, that's hi. It's God no.

[43:59] Alex: This is—it's supposed to be the two of us. I can't do this shit on my own. Shit. God damn it, shit.

[44:10] Alex: Hi, this is Alex, and this—I like Janelle.

[44:27] Julie: But I love you.

[44:31] Alex: Oh, you do?

[44:34] Julie: Yeah.

[44:37] Alex: Okay.

[44:38] Julie: Okay.

[44:41] Alex: I actually—I love you too.

[44:45] Julie: Yeah, I know it's pretty obvious.

[44:50] Alex: Cool. What should we do?

[44:58] Julie: I think maybe we can kiss now.

[45:03] Alex: Yeah, okay. That sounds good.

[45:08] Julie: Okay.

[45:34] Alex: Welcome back to another season of And the ANSWER IS. If you've got a question to ask, we've got an answer for you.

[45:44] Julie: It's senior year, bitches. Almost out into the real world. Bursting forth from the warm, nurturing womb of college.

[45:52] Alex: Right in time for a historic recession.

[45:54] Julie: Hi, Julian Alex.

[45:56] Alex: Julian Alex.

[45:57] Julie: We missed you so much!

[45:59] Alex: Is it Umbrella Ella, Ella, or Umbrella?

[46:03] Julie: Ella, Ella.

[46:05] Alex: Is it just me, or was Ratatouille not as good as Finding Nemo?

[46:10] Julie: What is Ratatouille for real, though? Is it made of actual rats or Drew Carey will never replace Bob Barker.

[46:19] Alex: I don't care. Core one out for Robert Goulet.

[46:22] Julie: Don't forget to follow us on Twitter. We've got a Twitter now. We try to answer all our DMs.

[46:27] Alex: And we block the nasty ones. Happy 2009!

[46:30] Julie: Another milestone episode.

[46:32] Alex: 150 of these things.

[46:34] Julie: Episode 165.

[46:36] Alex: 170.

[46:37] Julie: Hey, I like you.

[46:38] Alex: I like you too.

[46:40] Julie: 175.

[46:41] Alex: 180.

[46:42] Julie: Already almost time for summer.

[46:44] Alex: Professor Anderson loved my thesis. He thinks I've got a real shot. Gonna apply for grad school.

[46:49] Julie: You got this, Julie.

[46:50] Alex: In California.

[46:51] Julie: I can learn to love LA. Promise.

[46:54] Alex: What do you think's gonna be the song of the summer?

[46:56] Julie: Why does time move so quickly forward? Always marching, never ceasing.

[47:01] Alex: For more years.

[47:03] Julie: For more years.

[47:05] Alex: The hundred and ninety.

[47:06] Julie: Episode 195.

[47:08] Alex: Enough episodes to fly us to the moon and back.

[47:11] Julie: To Mars and back.

[47:13] Alex: Thank you for being part of our lives.

[47:15] Julie: Our lives.

[47:16] Alex: Our really thought I'd get in.

[47:18] Julie: You're the smartest.

[47:19] Alex: I don't know what to do.

[47:21] Julie: Let's move to Brooklyn.

[47:22] Alex: What?

[47:23] Julie: Like, together. Let's move to Brooklyn and be together.

[47:27] Alex: Okay. Sure. Yes, let's live together.

[47:32] Julie: Together.

[47:42] Alex: Can swine flu actually become a pandemic?

[47:45] Julie: It can't, right? Like, pandemics aren't a real thing.

[47:48] Alex: Anyway. My mom says that I can get swine flu even if I'm a vegetarian.

[47:53] Julie: How the hell can that be true? Do you think that Brad and Angelina can make it?

[47:56] Alex: What should I do with the rest of my life?

[47:58] Julie: What are you gonna do with the rest of your life?

[48:00] Alex: How long is the rest of your life?

[48:02] Julie: What happens at the end of our lives?

[48:09] Alex: Five flight walk-up. Sunset Park, though. So far from the city.

[48:14] Julie: It's the best neighborhood in Brooklyn. It's all we can afford.

[48:15] Alex: Just think about how hot your ass is gonna look walking up all those stairs.

[48:20] Julie: It already looks hot.

[48:22] Alex: I mean, I love you.

[48:24] Julie: Is this even a couch?

[48:26] Alex: It's so comfortable.

[48:27] Julie: It's great. We'll get throw pillows.

[48:30] Alex: They could be pink and orange.

[48:31] Julie: And green.

[48:32] Alex: How was work?

[48:33] Julie: Okay. How was your day?

[48:34] Alex: Fine.

[48:35] Julie: Let's go to the beach.

[48:37] Alex: Let's go to the Met. Broadway. A street fair. Coney Island.

[48:41] Julie: How was your day?

[48:43] Alex: Great. How was your day?

[48:44] Julie: The best.

[48:45] Alex: They're charging us $300 more a month.

[48:48] Julie: We can make it work.

[48:48] Alex: I hate this fridge. It's too small.

[48:50] Julie: We can make it work.

[48:51] Alex: No outdoor space.

[48:52] Julie: We can make it work.

[48:53] Alex: The sink.

[48:54] Julie: Work.

[48:55] Alex: I love you.

[48:55] Julie: I love you.

[48:56] Alex: I love you.

[48:57] Julie: How's work?

[48:58] Alex: Okay. How's your day?

[48:59] Julie: Fine.

[49:00] Alex: Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine.

[49:04] Julie: Bad.

[49:05] Alex: Fine, fine, bad, bad, bad.

[49:07] Julie: But at least I get to come home to you.

[49:12] Alex: And that's a wrap on episode 350 of And the ANSWER IS—Jesus, 350 episodes of this thing.

[49:21] Julie: We started this podcast four years ago. Never ever did I think—

[49:23] Alex: Five years ago.

[49:26] Julie: Shit, seriously?

[49:28] Alex: Yeah, we started at the end of freshman year. That was 2006.

[49:31] Julie: Oh shit. Five years. This thing is five years old.

[49:36] Alex: And that means we've been dating for three years.

[49:39] Julie: Yeah, but technically we've been together for all those five years, too.

[49:42] Alex: I love a technicality. Feels like just yesterday we were hiding out in your dorm room closet giggling in the heat.

[49:48] Julie: Yeah, now we have a big people closet to record in.

[49:51] Alex: Who knew?

[49:54] Julie: My madame. What's this?

[49:57] Alex: May I have this dance?

[49:59] Julie: Come here, beautiful.

[50:03] Alex: What's this burst of romance for?

[50:06] Julie: I woke up this morning, and the air inside our bedroom was gray blue with early winter morning. And everything looked kind of blue and steely and gray and cold, and it was so chilly. It went inside my skin. My blood felt like icicles. And I looked over to you, and you were lying there, wearing your bright pink bonnet, your neon green sweatshirt, drool cascading down your chin.

[50:32] Alex: Ew, uh, stop. Like a waterfall.

[50:35] Julie: That's so gross.

[50:37] Alex: And I suddenly felt so warm. Like looking at you, you make my heart warm. And I just thought, oh shit. I can't believe she's mine.

[50:51] Julie: When the fuck do you get so romantic?

[50:53] Alex: I've always been this romantic.

[51:01] Julie: You make me so happy.

[51:03] Alex: You are my happy.

[51:05] Julie: I love you.

[51:06] Alex: I love you.

[51:23] Julie: I got the job.

[51:25] Alex: You did?

[51:26] Julie: Yeah.

[51:26] Alex: Wow.

[51:27] Julie: That's wow.

[51:30] Alex: I can—I don't have to—

[51:32] Julie: No.

[51:32] Alex: No what?

[51:33] Julie: Of course you have to.

[51:34] Alex: I can stay.

[51:35] Julie: No, don't be—no.

[51:38] Alex: No, Julie. That's—it's so great. I am so happy for you.

[51:42] Julie: You are?

[51:43] Alex: Yeah, of course. Of course. You got the job. That's—it's amazing.

[51:49] Julie: But no, come on, no.

[51:51] Alex: I can—my job's remote, so I can—and I can run the podcast anywhere, you know. This is—I start in two weeks.

[51:59] Julie: Okay. Two weeks.

[52:01] Alex: That's fine.

[52:04] Julie: Two, we can—what do we have to do?

[52:07] Alex: We gotta get some boxes and a mover and you're gonna love LA.

[52:11] Julie: I'm sure I will.

[52:13] Alex: Because I love you. Come on, we gotta—let's go celebrate. We gotta celebrate.

[52:19] Julie: So let's celebrate.

[52:26] Alex: Hey listeners, exciting news. Julie got a dope new job, and this duo is gonna be packing up our shit and heading out west.

[52:36] Julie: And while we do that, we'll be on a bit of a hiatus. Just a couple of months while we get settled in and Julie dominates at her job, so you know, don't miss us too much.

[52:48] Alex: We'll be back with all of the answers after this brief break.

[52:55] Julie: It's kinda out of the way. It has a view. Can we record this weekend?

[52:59] Alex: I'm just so tired. Can we do next week?

[53:02] Julie: How about next weekend?

[53:04] Alex: Next weekend, I promise.

[53:06] Julie: Promise.

[53:08] Alex: I promise. Slight update. We're doing great over here in Los Angeles. Don't worry, we'll be back.

[53:16] Julie: Can we just watch TV?

[53:17] Alex: A little bit longer.

[53:18] Julie: Can we just go to the beach?

[53:20] Alex: Longer.

[53:21] Julie: Let's go dancing.

[53:22] Alex: Longer, Julie.

[53:24] Julie: Yeah. Can we make plans? I feel like I never see you.

[53:29] Alex: I've got a deadline coming up. I've gotta go in early. Manager needs me. Supervisor needs me. Boss needs me. They need me.

[53:37] Julie: The podcast?

[53:38] Alex: They need me. They—they need me. They just gonna clean out all the Twitter DMs.

[53:45] Alex: Hey, Alex. This is Warren from SUNY Albany. We used to eat in the dining hall together every once in a while. We used to really like the peanut butter and banana pizza they would make every Friday.

[53:58] Julie: It's funny. I assume you won't remember me, even though I clearly remember you. So anyway, hey, I've been listening to your podcast.

[54:07] Alex: Like recently, I just discovered it. Actually, a co-worker. I work for a nonprofit.

[54:14] Akyiaa Wilson: It's called Our Youth. We help the youth. I'm an HR, so you know, love the mission, but I'm an HR. And we all get along pretty well. Like, even though I'm an HR, it's small, so they include me in the staff meetings and all that. We're kind of like a family, which is nice because I still don't know too many people in the city. People think that like New York State and New York City are the same, and they're like, nothing about them's the same. But anyway, we were all talking about podcasts at work, and one of my coworkers, Garrett, he was like, hey, do you listen to this podcast? It's really funny. And it was yours. But I didn't know that at the time. I just started listening to it, and I couldn't stop listening to it.

And then I realized that it was you and that I knew you. I mean, we used to know one another so fucking long ago. I mean, I went to school to study history, and now I'm in HR, so I mean, I just you're both really funny and full of life, and it's late tonight. It's only 11:30, but I've already had half a bottle of wine, and they don't tell you how lonely this city is. It's so lonely. There's so many people, but only like one's your friend, maybe, if you're lucky. The other 15 are co-workers, and then the rest are strangers. And the strangers, they feel like an impossible infinity. Like they are there, but you know you'll never meet them. Somehow, it makes you feel even more lonely. And anyway, it was nice to hear familiar voice.

So, uh, yeah. Anyway, this is long. Lol. But uh, if you ever wanted to like get together for a cup of coffee or something, I don't know, that might be cool. Do you have a friend? You know. Anyway, I hope this doesn't just get lost in your DMs. Though I get it if it does. Say hi to Julie. Signed, Warren.

[56:30] Alisha Espinosa: Oh shit. Hello. Hi. I'm so sorry. I'm just seeing this. I know you sent this message three years ago. It totally did get lost in my DMs, but I just wanted to say hi. Of course I remember you. And thank you for the kind words about the show. Hope to hear from you soon.

[56:54] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh hey! Hi! You're real. Well, of course I am. What's up? God, I'm sorry it looked like I was ignoring you for three years. Jesus.

[57:07] Alisha Espinosa: No worries. Seriously. No, for real. I'm sorry, Jesus. I've answered all these strangers, and do you still listen to the podcast even?

[57:16] Akyiaa Wilson: You kidding? Of course! It's still my favorite.

[57:19] Alisha Espinosa: For real?

[57:20] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, you and Julie are just like the best. I've missed new episodes, but there's so many. I've just been re-listening to the old ones. I'm glad to hear you've got favorites too. That's dope as hell.

[57:30] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, you kidding me? Some of them, man, they're just you both just. I don't know. Sometimes it makes me feel like I'm right there with you all. Like you're talking with me.

[57:42] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, that's the fun thing about podcasts, right? They somehow make you feel less alone.

[57:48] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, right? Totally. So I guess I'm gonna go. Why didn't you think I'd remember you?

[57:57] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh. Oh, sorry if you've gotta go.

[58:01] Alisha Espinosa: No, no, I can stay. I just didn't want to bother you.

[58:04] Akyiaa Wilson: You're not bothering me. I guess I don't know. I guess I feel pretty forgettable. And you're like famous now.

[58:13] Alisha Espinosa: I'm not famous.

[58:15] Akyiaa Wilson: If people know who you are, like outside of them knowing who you are, I feel like that's kind of famous, you know. And I just assumed it was easy to forget the guy you used to share a pizza slice with.

[58:28] Alisha Espinosa: But we had all those talks.

[58:29] Akyiaa Wilson: I know. I still think about them.

[58:32] Alisha Espinosa: Me too. Seriously. Like, randomly I think of you, and you'd be in my mind, but I don't know. I didn't think you'd be thinking of me.

[58:42] Akyiaa Wilson: Life's funny. Are you still in New York?

[58:45] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, yeah. Still in New York. Still in HR. But now I work for a different nonprofit. Our youth went under.

[58:55] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh no.

[58:57] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah. Embezzlement.

[59:02] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh shit.

[59:04] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah. It was wild. And now I'm at a nonprofit that delivers food to the homeless called Sups On.

[59:13] Akyiaa Wilson: Wow. Seriously?

[59:16] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, with an exclamation point at the end and everything. Supson!

[59:21] Akyiaa Wilson: That's so bad.

[59:25] Alisha Espinosa: Typical non-profit. Good mission, dumb name, bad management.

[59:30] Akyiaa Wilson: That's so real. It's cool you moved to LA.

[59:33] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah. Julie got a job and like we came out.

[59:37] Akyiaa Wilson: That's cool. Right?

[59:39] Alisha Espinosa: I know, right?

[59:41] Akyiaa Wilson: Right. But also, it's like not cool at all. I hate it. LA, I mean, God, I miss Brooklyn so much.

[59:52] Alisha Espinosa: What's LA like?

[59:54] Akyiaa Wilson: It is not for me. But the weather.

[59:57] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, the weather's great. Everything's beautiful all the time. And it's so chill. There's not this constant worry about getting to the next thing as soon as possible, which is nice. But it's not home.

[1:00:11] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, I get that.

[1:00:13] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah. I mean, I understand what you said in your original message about being so lonely. I get that. Like, how do grown-ups make friends, you know?

[1:00:24] Akyiaa Wilson: Right?

[1:00:24] Alisha Espinosa: School didn't prepare me for this.

[1:00:26] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah. Sometimes I'm like, should I go to grad school? Just because I feel like it'll mean I will make friends. Even if it's with my professor. Like, there's nowhere to go and like be like, oh hi, it's the friend zone where you can stop by and make friends. What do I need to do? Get a hobby?

[1:00:48] Alisha Espinosa: Oh yeah, and I'm bad at hobbies. I just go, great, this is fun and all, but how can I dominate it and turn it into something lucrative?

[1:00:57] Akyiaa Wilson: Right!

[1:00:58] Alisha Espinosa: I am the same way. Like I got this adult coloring book because it's supposed to be relaxing. And at first it was, and I loved coloring, but then I was like, I need to be the best at coloring ever.

[1:01:11] Akyiaa Wilson: Right.

[1:01:15] Alisha Espinosa: Hey. I'm glad you messaged me. I like. I like talking to you.

[1:01:25] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, I like talking to you too.

[1:01:34] Alisha Espinosa: What time will you be home tonight?

[1:01:35] Akyiaa Wilson: By seven, the latest. Eight, the latest. Nine, I'm sorry. I never get to see you.

[1:01:41] Alisha Espinosa: We'll make time, I promise. Next weekend, I promise. Next week, swear. I miss you.

[1:01:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Hey, so what do you miss most about New York?

[1:01:50] Alisha Espinosa: Uh, the way you could get anywhere in the whole five boroughs with just a swipe of Metro card.

[1:01:55] Akyiaa Wilson: You can learn to drive.

[1:01:57] Alisha Espinosa: Really? I thought you'd say bacon egg and cheese on a bagel.

[1:02:00] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh my god, don't tease me like that. Bagels taste just as good here. Don't be such a snob. You grew up on Miami bagels, so you don't know.

[1:02:09] Alisha Espinosa: I ate Brooklyn bagels for two years, and these are just as fine.

[1:02:13] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, please. Or like a New York slice.

[1:02:16] Alisha Espinosa: Oh god, what I wouldn't give for a New York slice. Pizza's really unhealthy for you anyway.

[1:02:21] Akyiaa Wilson: I've actually been thinking about going vegan.

[1:02:23] Alisha Espinosa: It's the water.

[1:02:24] Akyiaa Wilson: The tap water sucks here.

[1:02:25] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, there's nothing like Brooklyn water.

[1:02:28] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, it tastes so good. We've got a Britta. It's basically the same thing.

[1:02:33] Alisha Espinosa: It's so not the same.

[1:02:35] Akyiaa Wilson: It so is.

[1:02:36] Alisha Espinosa: Isn't. Are you ever gonna start your podcast up again, do you think?

[1:02:39] Akyiaa Wilson: Probably not. Julie's like really busy here, and I don't think she was even really that into it in the first place.

[1:02:47] Alisha Espinosa: Really?

[1:02:47] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, I think I kind of peer pressured her into doing it. It was my thesis. It's been my favorite thing to do.

[1:02:55] Alisha Espinosa: Whatever. Maybe I grew out of it. You should start up your own if you love it so much. It can be the same, but different, you know.

[1:03:04] Akyiaa Wilson: Uh, what would I talk about by myself?

[1:03:07] Alisha Espinosa: I don't know. Facts, fun facts, random facts, the news.

[1:03:13] Akyiaa Wilson: Gonna call it Alex's answers.

[1:03:16] Alisha Espinosa: Huh?

[1:03:17] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, and it's just gonna be a subset of the podcast.

[1:03:21] Alisha Espinosa: Really?

[1:03:21] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, since you've been too busy.

[1:03:24] Alisha Espinosa: No, I mean that as a fact, not as like a bad thing.

[1:03:28] Akyiaa Wilson: Okay. I miss doing it, Julie. I liked doing it. And I liked giving answers.

[1:03:34] Alisha Espinosa: It sounds like fun. Maybe I can guest it sometime.

[1:03:40] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, maybe. That'll be nice. You think anyone will listen to it?

[1:03:44] Alisha Espinosa: I'll listen to it. Promise.

[1:03:46] Akyiaa Wilson: And so I'm screaming from the kitchen. Hey! Hey, get the fire extinguisher! I honestly had no idea that toaster ovens could catch on fire. I thought that was a myth.

[1:03:53] Alisha Espinosa: Anything can catch on fire if it's got enough heat.

[1:03:57] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm not so sure that's true.

[1:03:58] Alisha Espinosa: That's scientific.

[1:03:59] Akyiaa Wilson: You're crazy.

[1:04:00] Alisha Espinosa: For you.

[1:04:05] Akyiaa Wilson: I mean. Uh you don't get home till it's late.

[1:04:10] Alisha Espinosa: Oh, they wanted to go out for drinks. It's late. Deadline's coming up, and they need me at the office.

[1:04:16] Akyiaa Wilson: The cold. I miss the cold, but like not exactly how it feels. More like how it smells, you know? That crispness. It doesn't really exist here. Not even by the ocean where it's cooler. I try to search for it with my nose, and sometimes it's in corners by the ocean, but then I don't know, it just disappears. Like maybe it was never even there.

[1:04:41] Alisha Espinosa: If I could bottle up the cold and send it to you, I would.

[1:04:45] Akyiaa Wilson: Thanks, Warren. Sometimes I miss the stars. Like, I know they're there behind all that gray, but I don't know. Sometimes I feel like nobody's ever gonna listen to me again.

[1:04:58] Alisha Espinosa: I listen.

[1:05:00] Akyiaa Wilson: I know. HR is fine and all, but I don't know. It's kind of like a dead end. Like there's an actual level you hit, and it's the big boss level, and once you defeat it, it's like, okay, now what? I guess this is it for the rest of my life, but damn. I think the rest of my life could go on for a while, you know?

[1:05:20] Alisha Espinosa: Well, what do you want to do?

[1:05:22] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't know. I studied history because I wanted to try to make sense of the world, but it seems like there's not really a job for that. Almost like we don't want to understand our world or learn from what it was to just keep it moving forward.

[1:05:38] Alisha Espinosa: So carve out a space for yourself. You don't have to be defined by what you should do. Maybe you can do what you want. Maybe you should do that too.

[1:05:50] Akyiaa Wilson: Sometimes it's so dark at night. I feel like it sticks to me during the day.

[1:05:56] Alisha Espinosa: What?

[1:05:57] Akyiaa Wilson: I'm sorry, baby. Did you say something?

[1:06:00] Alisha Espinosa: Nah.

[1:06:02] Akyiaa Wilson: Sometimes it's so dark at night. I feel like it sticks to me during the day.

[1:06:07] Alisha Espinosa: Yeah, I get that. I hear you. I understand. I get that. I hear you. I understand. I get that. I hear you.

[1:06:15] Alisha Espinosa: Come on, Alex.

[1:06:21] Akyiaa Wilson: I really don't want to.

[1:06:22] Alisha Espinosa: Everyone wants to meet you.

[1:06:24] Akyiaa Wilson: They don't even know me.

[1:06:25] Alisha Espinosa: They kinda do. I talk about you enough. Some of them even listen to your new podcast.

[1:06:29] Akyiaa Wilson: I don't know. They all want to meet you.

[1:06:31] Alisha Espinosa: Ugh, Julie, you know I hate parties.

[1:06:33] Akyiaa Wilson: It's not a real party. It's like a happy hour.

[1:06:36] Alisha Espinosa: I don't know.

[1:06:36] Akyiaa Wilson: Oh, come on. It's not like you've got anything better to do.

[1:06:39] Alisha Espinosa: The fuck, Julie?

[1:06:41] Akyiaa Wilson: No, I mean because you don't really go anywhere.

[1:06:44] Alisha Espinosa: I'm busy, okay? I'm busy.

[1:06:46] Akyiaa Wilson: Doing what?

[1:06:48] Alisha Espinosa: If you listen to my new podcast, you'd know. Life's more than just working all the time.

[1:06:53] Akyiaa Wilson: Look who's talking. I do more than just work.

[1:06:56] Alisha Espinosa: I'm not going, Julie, okay? I'm staying home. Do what you want. I just order some sushi, open the six pack, and sticking Fellowship of the Ring into the DVD player right now.

[1:07:07] Alisha Espinosa: Uh that sounds incredible. I'm just gonna keep editing these episodes until my eyes bleed out my ears.

[1:07:15] Akyiaa Wilson: Well, don't do that. That doesn't sound like fun.

[1:07:18] Alisha Espinosa: Sometimes it is fun when it isn't work, you know?

[1:07:23] Akyiaa Wilson: Wanna watch Fellowship of the Ring together?

[1:07:26] Alisha Espinosa: Seriously?

[1:07:27] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah. You have Fellowship of the Ring, right?

[1:07:30] Alisha Espinosa: Obviously.

[1:07:31] Akyiaa Wilson: Cool. Yeah, I'll wait for you to press play. We'll watch it together.

[1:07:34] Alisha Espinosa: You're serious.

[1:07:36] Akyiaa Wilson: Yeah, it'll be fun. We can like pretend like we're watching it together because we'll be watching it sorta together.

[1:07:44] Alisha Espinosa: That actually sounds like fun.

[1:07:46] Alex: You wanna?

[1:07:48] Julie: Alright.

[1:07:49] Alex: You ready?

[1:07:50] Julie: On the count of three.

[1:07:52] Alex: One, two.

[1:07:55] Julie: Let's go visit my parents for Thanksgiving.

[1:07:58] Alex: Let's go back to Brooklyn for Christmas.

[1:08:00] Julie: New York in December.

[1:08:02] Alex: Bryant Park, Union Square.

[1:08:04] Julie: Can we just stay here?

[1:08:05] Alex: Let's just stay here.

[1:08:07] Julie: Let's just stay.

[1:08:08] Alex: Stay, stay, stay.

[1:08:10] Julie: Hey, so I'll be in LA for Christmas?

[1:08:12] Alex: Seriously?

[1:08:13] Julie: Yeah.

[1:08:14] Alex: Maybe we can meet up.

[1:08:16] Julie: Maybe we can.

[1:08:17] Alex: I've been listening to your new podcast.

[1:08:20] Julie: Oh, yeah?

[1:08:21] Alex: Yeah, I really. It's good.

[1:08:24] Julie: Thanks.

[1:08:25] Alex: Makes me kind of miss doing the old one.

[1:08:29] Julie: Yeah.

[1:08:29] Alex: I've got more free time now.

[1:08:31] Julie: Maybe we can.

[1:08:32] Alex: I don't know if I can handle doing two at the same time.

[1:08:36] Julie: Oh yeah, sure. I get that.

[1:08:38] Alex: Yeah.

[1:08:39] Julie: You sure you don't want to come out with me?

[1:08:42] Alex: No, I'm busy.

[1:08:44] Julie: I'm busy.

[1:08:45] Alex: Hey, let's go out.

[1:08:47] Julie: I'm busy.

[1:08:48] Alex: Let's watch a movie.

[1:08:49] Julie: Busy.

[1:08:50] Alex: There's an outdoor ice skating thing that's supposed to be fun.

[1:08:53] Julie: Do you want to go buy a tree?

[1:08:55] Alex: We can decorate this weekend.

[1:08:57] Julie: I don't have to work.

[1:08:58] Alex: We can buy an activity.

[1:09:00] Julie: Put up the cards.

[1:09:01] Alex: It's December and the apartment's so empty.

[1:09:04] Julie: Let's fill it with cheer.

[1:09:05] Alex: Let's fill it.

[1:09:06] Julie: Let's I think.

[1:09:08] Alex: I think you're.

[1:09:10] Julie: Are you?

[1:09:12] Alex: Julie, have I missed you? Have I lost you? Have I I'll see you so soon, oh my god.

[1:09:19] Julie: I know! I can't believe it.

[1:09:21] Alex: You got the address?

[1:09:22] Julie: Yes.

[1:09:23] Alex: I can't wait to see you.

[1:09:24] Julie: It'll be so good to see you.

[1:09:26] Alex: I'll be there soon.

[1:09:34] Julie: Hey, I'm Julie.

[1:09:36] Alex: And I'm Alex.

[1:09:37] Julie: Welcome to the very first episode of And the ANSWER IS.

[1:09:42] Alex: The show that gives you answers to all life's little and big questions.

[1:09:46] Julie: So if you've got a question to ask.

[1:09:48] Alex: We've got an answer for you.

[1:09:51] Julie: Hey.

[1:09:52] Alex: Oh, I uh didn't realize you hadn't left yet.

[1:09:57] Julie: Yeah, no, I was just leaving.

[1:09:59] Alex: Just is a killer of a word.

[1:10:02] Julie: What?

[1:10:03] Alex: Where are you going for real, Alex?

[1:10:05] Julie: Just to a coffee shop.

[1:10:06] Alex: Are you ready, Alex?

[1:10:07] Julie: Alex, you are very well aware that my ass was born ready.

[1:10:11] Alex: Seriously, Julie?

[1:10:12] Julie: Okay, but also don't go.

[1:10:15] Alex: It's just coffee.

[1:10:16] Julie: Stop saying just. It's not.

[1:10:20] Alex: Don't go, please.

[1:10:23] Julie: Don't tell me I'm too late.

[1:10:25] Alex: Julie.

[1:10:26] Julie: I know, I know, I know. I know I've been so deep in my own shit, and I guess I didn't see.

[1:10:34] Alex: I just I kept seeing how it was.

[1:10:38] Julie: How we were.

[1:10:40] Alex: And I thought that meant we'd stay like that forever.

[1:10:43] Julie: Because in those moments they were forever, and it was so much fun.

[1:10:48] Alex: Us in that hot fucking closet in the dorms, and then us in that tiny Brooklyn apartment, dancing on the creaky floor, drinking that cheap wine, and listening to our episodes and giggling and laughing and I didn't see it change.

[1:10:48] Julie: I didn't see it happening.

[1:11:09] Alex: I don't know when it happened, but oh god, Julie.

[1:11:13] Julie: I think I think maybe you started running ahead of me while I was stuck here, standing still.

[1:11:22] Alex: I've been standing still this whole time while you ran ahead of me, and now I I don't know.

[1:11:28] Julie: I don't know if you're too far for me to catch up.

[1:11:32] Alex: I think you might be.

[1:11:34] Julie: Like, I feel like you're not here anymore.

[1:11:39] Alex: Like we still sleep in the same bed, and you feel so warm next to me, but also you feel so cold.

[1:11:49] Julie: And sometimes your eyes look like a stranger's.

[1:11:52] Alex: You look like my Julie, but you also you look like someone else lives inside you now.

[1:12:02] Julie: Who moved in?

[1:12:05] Alex: Are you already gone?

[1:12:09] Julie: I think you left me.

[1:12:11] Alex: You're standing right next to me, but I miss you so much.

[1:12:16] Julie: Please don't leave me.

[1:12:29] Alex: You haven't looked at me in so long.

[1:12:35] Julie: Just don't go.

[1:12:36] Alex: Please.

[1:12:40] Julie: I'll see you later.

[1:12:41] Alex: Julie, please.

[1:12:58] Julie: Fine, fine, fine, fine.

[1:13:00] Alex: What makes you laugh the most?

[1:13:02] Julie: Your dumbass does.

[1:13:03] Alex: Yes!

[1:13:05] Julie: What's your biggest fear?

[1:13:06] Alex: I'm not afraid of anything.

[1:13:08] Julie: Come on, there's gotta be something.

[1:13:10] Alex: I'm afraid of ghosts.

[1:13:11] Julie: I'm not afraid of anything.

[1:13:13] Alex: You can't not be afraid of What?

[1:13:15] Julie: I am invincible!

[1:13:16] Alex: I am an invincible bitch.

[1:13:17] Julie: Nothing can touch me, so I'm not afraid of anything.

[1:13:26] Alex: Hey everyone. This is Alex and Julie.

[1:13:28] Julie: Here with a little bit of an announcement, but mostly a confirmation of what you've all already put together.

[1:13:39] Alex: After nearly three hundred glorious episodes of And the ANSWER IS our lives have gotten too busy to continue.

[1:13:47] Julie: Ouch, Alex.

[1:13:49] Alex: Harsh.

[1:13:50] Julie: What do you want me to say?

[1:13:52] Alex: We've decided to part ways.

[1:13:54] Julie: Our shit's gonna be in two different homes, so we figured it wouldn't be convenient to continue.

[1:13:59] Alex: We basically hate each other now, so which one's less harsh?

[1:14:04] Julie: God, I don't even want to do this.

[1:14:06] Alex: They figured it out by now, Julie.

[1:14:08] Julie: Jesus.

[1:14:09] Alex: You've got your new podcast, they'll listen to you there.

[1:14:11] Julie: You don't need to do this.

[1:14:12] Alex: No, it's just I don't want to do this.

[1:14:16] Julie: Fuck it, I've got more packing to do.

[1:14:18] Alex: No, wait, Julie, just wait.

[1:14:22] Julie: Please.

[1:14:24] Alex: I lied.

[1:14:26] Julie: About what?

[1:14:28] Alex: I re-listened to the first episode.

[1:14:31] Julie: And when I said I wasn't afraid of anything.

[1:14:34] Alex: Yeah, I know.

[1:14:36] Julie: That wasn't.

[1:14:38] Alex: It's not true.

[1:14:39] Julie: Yeah, I know.

[1:14:40] Alex: You're afraid of the dark and earthquakes and uh No, but it's no.

[1:14:46] Julie: I'm afraid.

[1:14:51] Alex: I'm afraid of losing you.

[1:14:55] Julie: I've been afraid of losing you since the second I met you.

[1:15:01] Alex: I love you so much, Julie.

[1:15:04] Julie: I was supposed to meet this guy.

[1:15:06] Alex: We'd been.

[1:15:08] Julie: It'd been nice talking to him.

[1:15:10] Alex: And I was supposed to meet him.

[1:15:12] Julie: And I liked him, Alex.

[1:15:15] Alex: I really, really liked him.

[1:15:17] Julie: He made me feel warm, but I didn't.

[1:15:17] Alex: I didn't.

[1:15:23] Julie: I walked to a CVS and walked up and down the aisles and looked at every cough drop and paper towel and pen.

[1:15:31] Alex: I studied all the pens.

[1:15:34] Julie: And then I came home, and we felt like two shoelaces that had come untied.

[1:15:58] Alex: Tie ourselves together.

[1:16:10] Julie: Will you love me still?

[1:17:32] Alex: I sit here with them in my mess of broken gears, slowly conceding the price of all my faith.

[1:17:49] Julie: You're so far away.

[1:17:53] Alex: I'm back in just a day, but my mind remains in a future void of ground and soothing words.

[1:18:44] Julie: Come down to show my signal my virtues and every time I say I'd never know why I'll perform his blooms up now in this club, it's getting late I'll be performing long before I get on stage what you want from me all of us honestly well I've got insane not from the landlord or the sting of morning white play in a man lord can strangle up your mind See love stricken but this I know it's better now stuck in side the rose come down to show my signal my virtues and though you ask me every time I know it's by sort of thousand times.

[1:21:01] Alex: I'll treat my life like my patrons kind. I'll stay at home when with you.

[1:21:25] Iyvon Edebiri: What a show.

[1:21:29] Iyvon Edebiri: No, you know it's not so before we get into our interview portion of the evening, we want to give another warm round of applause for our wonderful cast.

[1:22:32] Iyvon Edebiri: It was so great. As I mentioned earlier, our playwright Gina unfortunately cannot be here tonight, but we do have our wonderful director for this evening, Estefanía Fadul.

[1:22:53] Estefanía Fadul: Okay. So how did that feel? Like sitting in the audience and hearing.

[1:22:59] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah, I've never done an audio play before. So it was really great to just hear it and see all the work that everyone did.

[1:23:05] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah, and that actually leads me to like my first question was how was it for you to direct a radio play about a podcast in a podcast?

[1:23:15] Estefanía Fadul: It was very meta. So many layers. So many layers.

[1:23:21] Estefanía Fadul: It was really fun because I think it just kind of lends itself.

[1:23:47] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah, and I'm glad you know this play was written for the Parsnip Ship as part of a commission. And so we definitely had it in mind when Gina told us that they were going to write essentially a radio play within a radio play. We were like, go forth and conquer Gina. Go forth.

[1:24:04] Iyvon Edebiri: Okay. How do you know Gina? How y'all know each other?

[1:24:08] Estefanía Fadul: Oh my god. So we actually met maybe like 11 or 12 years ago when we were both working at there was this little theater on 52nd 57th Street called Looking Glass Theater. I don't think it exists anymore. And we were both there and we met but like didn't know each other too well.

[1:24:26] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah. And it wasn't until about two years ago that we reconnected to do a workshop. And since then we worked together. I think this is our third collaboration in like two years.

[1:24:36] Iyvon Edebiri: Oh, I love that. That's so great. Um, okay, so because this is not our usual format, and also being very inspired by what I was listening tonight, I was like, ooh, maybe we're gonna do our own little short, and the answer is questions kind of situation.

[1:24:55] Iyvon Edebiri: I know throwing a curveball. It was gonna be fun.

[1:24:58] Estefanía Fadul: It was gonna be fun. I was literally telling the actors in rehearsal, I would be so nervous if I should do that.

[1:25:04] Iyvon Edebiri: Well, I heard.

[1:25:08] Iyvon Edebiri: Okay, these are gonna be fun. These are gonna be fun. Okay.

[1:25:10] Iyvon Edebiri: Um, okay, first one. What was the moment that made you want to be a director?

[1:25:16] Estefanía Fadul: Oh my god. Um that's such a good question. I I don't know if there was a moment. I I just like always really loved it since I was since I was really little, and over I think I wanted to be an actor when I was little, like so many of us. Um, and then over time started doing more like you know, stage managing when I was in school and more like backstage things, and then by high school I had realized I really love directing.

[1:25:38] Iyvon Edebiri: Yeah, I love it. Was there a particular show that made you go, that's what I want to do?

[1:25:44] Estefanía Fadul: Uh no, but I remember when I was very little, probably like under five, seeing a production of Peter Pan where they flew. And I I still remember they flew, and that was cool.

[1:25:54] Iyvon Edebiri: Oh.

[1:25:54] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah, so I think that's stuck with me.

[1:25:56] Iyvon Edebiri: Was it comparable to Rihanna floating on the Super Bowl stage yesterday?

[1:26:03] Estefanía Fadul: I think Rihanna definitely was a step above.

[1:26:06] Iyvon Edebiri: Correct. What's your favorite color?

[1:26:12] Estefanía Fadul: Green.

[1:26:13] Iyvon Edebiri: Ooh, okay. What was your favorite Halloween costume?

[1:26:17] Estefanía Fadul: Ginger spice from the Spice Girls.

[1:26:20] Iyvon Edebiri: Ginger. No one goes for ginger, so big ups.

[1:26:24] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah, you know, that was, I have no idea how that how that happened. I had some of that red spray thing. It was very, yeah.

[1:26:32] Iyvon Edebiri: Um what's your favorite kind of fruit pie?

[1:26:36] Estefanía Fadul: Blueberry.

[1:26:37] Iyvon Edebiri: Oh, okay. Um, and do do if you could start a podcast, what would it be about?

[1:26:44] Estefanía Fadul: Oh my god. Uh cool people doing unexpected things.

[1:26:50] Iyvon Edebiri: I love that. Would that be the title?

[1:26:52] Estefanía Fadul: Yes. Cool people doing unexpected things.

[1:26:55] Iyvon Edebiri: Definitely.

[1:26:56] Iyvon Edebiri: Yeah. What is this one? Is kind of like a weird curve, like not a curveball. I it's a meta question, another one. What is one question you haven't had an answer to?

[1:27:08] Estefanía Fadul: Oh my god. That's a big one. Um, what's the meaning of life?

[1:27:16] Estefanía Fadul: I don't know. We're going big. I really actually believe babies know the meaning of life. Probably.

[1:27:22] Estefanía Fadul: And then they grow up and they're like, shit. And then they forget. And then we, yeah, it's like all of us. We've forgotten.

[1:27:27] Iyvon Edebiri: Yeah.

[1:27:28] Estefanía Fadul: And then some decline more than others as they get into adulthood.

[1:27:31] Iyvon Edebiri: Totally fortunate. Um last question, and we ask all of our playwrights this at the end of our interview. What did you have for breakfast this morning?

[1:27:43] Estefanía Fadul: Um, I had one of those breakfast sandwiches from Starbucks.

[1:27:47] Iyvon Edebiri: Okay. Yes. Which one?

[1:27:50] Estefanía Fadul: The spinach and feta one.

[1:27:52] Iyvon Edebiri: That's a good one.

[1:27:53] Estefanía Fadul: Yeah, it was great. Love that.

[1:27:56] Iyvon Edebiri: Well, thank you.

[1:28:01] Estefanía Fadul: Thank you.

[1:28:05] Estefanía Fadul: Gina will pay for this.

[1:28:10] Estefanía Fadul: Send this, send us to them and go. You owe me.

[1:28:12] Iyvon Edebiri: Yeah, exactly.

[1:28:14] Iyvon Edebiri: All right. So we're gonna start wrapping up with some thank yous for our wonderful collaborators who are part of this episode tonight. So again to our wonderful cast, Akyiaa Wilson, Alisha Espinosa, Jacqueline Guillen, and Reynaldo Piniella.

[1:28:35] Iyvon Edebiri: This episode was directed by Estefanía Fadul.

[1:28:43] Iyvon Edebiri: And our musician tonight is Henry Ryeder.

[1:28:49] Iyvon Edebiri: The sound design for this play was created by Emilie Weibel and engineered by Bennett Lin.

[1:28:59] Iyvon Edebiri: And the answer is was written by Gina Femia.

[1:29:07] Iyvon Edebiri: We love you, Gina. Thank you to our sound engineer and editor Luke DeCola.

[1:29:15] Iyvon Edebiri: And thank you to our TPS team and producer Business Lunch Productions.

[1:29:20] Iyvon Edebiri: BLP is a leading creative agency based in New York City, working with creatives all around the world.

[1:29:26] Iyvon Edebiri: And thanks to the Mark O'Donnell Theater at the Entertainment Community Fund Arts Center for having us in their space in downtown Brooklyn tonight.

[1:29:39] Iyvon Edebiri: Before we get to hear our last song from Henry to close the night, I just wanted to say, please follow us on Facebook and Instagram at the Parsnip Ship and Y. If you would like to support the Parsnip Ship, please help us grow and reach new audiences by sharing your experience and episodes across social networks.

[1:29:58] Iyvon Edebiri: You can listen to all of our past episodes on iTunes, Spotify, Broadway Podcast Network, and anywhere you hear your podcast.

[1:30:05] Iyvon Edebiri: Our final episodes of season five will be available over the next month. And February is a special month because we have a second live episode recording in just a couple of weeks, and that is Are You There Truman by Garrett David Kim?

[1:30:20] Iyvon Edebiri: And that is happening on Monday, February 27th. New plays, new music, this is how we hear theater.

[1:30:32] Iyvon Edebiri: And turn it over to you, Henry.

[1:30:34] Henry Ryeder: Thank you.

[1:30:38] Henry Ryeder: This actually isn't a new one, but um I think it fits very, very well with the end of the show.

[1:30:45] Henry Ryeder: Wow. Sadly, I might have done on a new number.

[1:31:21] Henry Ryeder: Woke you from my sense slumber, breaking you down every single way. Fill you with anger thinking grain. Made you curse your God up. Hold you from presence in your heart. Finished before you could even start. Making you lonesome, made you cruel. As it went and broke every single room in any world I had understand. Just let 'em down easy. Let it let them down knees, come up, walking on its own time. But you got yourself to get behind. Got the world to gain it, nothing lose with kindness never thought the world so small is when over you give that call. Your friends, then you really ought to know how much I gave till it came to blows. I know it's coming any day. You die trouble, bliss out chain.

Who could blame you for your pain designs? But baby, I'm burned with that eyes. So just let me down, easy, let me down, easy commas working on its own times. But you got yourself to get me hard to just let me down. Got the world to gain and nothing loose. Just let me down. Let me down easy. Let me tell you easily.

[1:34:44] Henry Ryeder: Thank you, man.