Actors hear it all the time: "Just be confident." But what does confidence actually look like—and can it really be. created on demand? In this episode of Casting Actors Cast, veteran casting director, actor, educator, and author Jeffrey Dreisbach... Read More
From the show: Casting Actors Cast
About
Actors hear it all the time: "Just be confident." But what does confidence actually look like—and can it really be
created on demand?
In this episode of Casting Actors Cast, veteran casting director, actor, educator, and author Jeffrey Dreisbach
explores the psychology behind authentic confidence, why rejection affects actors so deeply, the difference
between confidence and self-esteem, and why self-trust—not fearlessness—is the real foundation of a
successful acting career.
Drawing from decades behind the casting table, personal experience, and practical strategies you can begin
using immediately, this episode will help you approach auditions, self-tapes, and your creative life with greater
resilience, perspective, and purpose.
Whether you're just beginning your acting journey or you've been navigating this business for years, this
conversation will challenge the way you think about confidence—and perhaps change it forever.
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another actor who could use a
little encouragement today.
Transcript
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Have you ever noticed something strange
about actors?
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We're told to become emotionally
available,
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emotionally vulnerable, emotionally
open,
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00:00:11,478 --> 00:00:14,247
and then we're expected to develop a
thick skin.
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We're supposed to feel everything
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00:00:17,317 --> 00:00:19,519
and somehow, let nothing hurt us.
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Now
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that's quite a job description.
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00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:27,861
So to day, I'd like to explore
something we hear all the time, in
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acting classes,
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00:00:29,629 --> 00:00:33,767
in auditions and in workshops, even
from casting directors.
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Just be confident.
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What does that actually mean?
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Because after spending decades on both
sides of the audition table, I think
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we've been talking about confidence
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all wrong.
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Let's change that.
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This is casting actorscast.
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Well, hello, and welcome to casting
actress cast.
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Everyone.
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I'm Jeff drizeback.
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I'm a casting director with mccorical
gasting in New York.
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How are you?
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I hope you haven't a good day.
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I'm having a good day.
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And this is the subject I've wanted to
tackle for a long time,
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because it took a lot of research.
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I really wanted to make sure that this
podcast included as much information as
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I possibly could.
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And so it's going to be a little bit on
the longer side, I think.
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But, you know, by a few minutes
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from what you may be used to.
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You see, I don't try to get a specific
time frame for every podcast.
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They vary depending upon the subject.
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But anyway, I just wanted to give you a
heads up about that.
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But first, this is that moment of the
conversation where I get to say thank
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you so much for tuning in to our
podcast.
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It's been a great pleasure bringing all
of these episodes to you every week,
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Thursday at one o'clock.
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We're also on YouTube.
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But this is also my opportunity to just
say thank you.
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It's been a great journey, and I've
really enjoyed having all of the
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feedback that you've provided me as
inspiration for future podcasts.
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You can do the same thing if you're
interested.
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Simply go to casting actor's cast all
one word, dot com, casting actress,
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cast dotcom.
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And there you're going to find all
kinds of really interesting information.
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There's some past episodes that I think
are really great starting point if
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you're new to the business.
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Or you can even check out the book or
the course
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or jeff's jots, which are actually show
notes from each of the individual
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podcast episodes.
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So invite you to take a look.
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All you need to do is fill out a form
that says, dive into the talent,
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positive pool, right there on the
landing page.
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Now that's all I ask for.
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I don't use that information to Spam
you or
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sell it or do anything like that.
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It's just simply there as an indicator
for me to know how many of you are out
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there, and you know what, it's growing
exponentially.
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So I couldn't be more grateful.
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But anyway, filling off that form
that's going to bring you some free
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stuff.
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One is a book I'm doing voice over work
called conversation pieces out of the
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studio.
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The voice over workshop, four
professional actors, it's absolutely
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free of charge by just going to the
website and filling out the form.
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Additionally there's a video called
casting secrets.
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What they don't tell you, but I'm going
to tell you,
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also on that landing page, there's some
additional freebies.
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I'm not going to spend too much time
talking about it, because you have to
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kind of scan the website just a little
bit.
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But anyway, that's all there and
available for you.
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And so I guess that's all I have to
say.
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Except I want to give my shout out to
my good friends at actor's connection,
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actress connection dotcomslash, New
York.
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So I just needed to say that thank you.
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And if you've been listening for a
while,
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I just want to say thank you for making
me part of your acting journey.
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Every week we talk about the craft, the
business, and perhaps most importantly,
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the mindset that allows actors to build
long, creative and fulfilling careers.
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Because booking a role is wonderful,
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but building a career
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that's a different skill.
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Let's jump into it.
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Today's conversation, isn't really
about auditions.
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Honestly, it's about something much
bigger.
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It's about the relationship you have
with yourself.
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And that relationship quietly walks
into every audition
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before you do.
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You know, I can't count the number of
times I've heard an actor say, Jeff, I
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just wish I had more confidence.
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Maybe you've said something similar.
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Maybe you've thought, if I were only
more confident, I would audition
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better, I'd get more callbacks,
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I'd stop second guessing myself.
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I'd finally feel like I belong in this
business.
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Guess what I understand?
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I've thought those same things myself,
but here's what I've learned.
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Confidence isn't something you go out
and find
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it isn't hidden behind the perfect
acting class, or the perfect agent, or
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the perfect self tape set up.
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Confidence is something much quieter
than that.
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And I think we've mistaken it for
something it was never meant to be.
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That's what I call the confidence myth.
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So let's talk about this for a second.
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What picture comes into your mind when
you hear the word confidence?
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Now, most people imagine some one who
walks into a room with,
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oh, I don't know, perfect posture, a
firm handshake, great eye contact,
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never seems nervous,
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always knows exactly what to say.
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We've all met people like that, or at
least we've met people
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who appear that way.
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But here's what's interesting.
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Some of the most confident actors I've
ever cast
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were among the quietest.
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They weren't trying to impress any one.
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They weren't performing confidence.
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They were simply present.
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Meanwhile, I've seen actors walk into
auditions with enormous personalities,
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big Smiles, big energy, big handshakes,
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big voices.
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And underneath all of that,
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they were terrified.
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Sometimes what we call confidence is
actually performance.
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We're acting confident, not feeling
confident.
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And believe me,
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casting directors can usually tell the
difference
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absolutely.
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So here's something that I've observed
over thousands, and I don't know
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thousands, I guess, of auditions.
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Confident actors don't spend much
energy trying to convince me they're confident.
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They spend their energy telling the
story.
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That's where their attention lives,
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not on themselves, on the work
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that changes everything.
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So allow me a casting room observation.
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Let me tell you something that I've
noticed.
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Every once in a while, an actor walks
into the room, and within thirty
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seconds, everyone relaxes,
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the director relaxes, the producer,
relaxes, I relax.
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And not because the actor is dazzling,
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necessarily,
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not because they're famous,
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not because they're loud,
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because
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they're grounded.
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You see, they listen, they're curious.
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They are playful, they're prepared.
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If something unexpected happens, they
adapt.
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If they make a mistake,
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they recover.
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They don't panic, they don't apologize,
they don't suddenly begin acting
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harder.
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They simply stay connected.
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And do you know what I find fascinating
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when those auditions are over,
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those actors almost never describe
themselves as confidence.
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They usually say something like, I
trusted my preparation,
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or I was having fun,
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or this is my favorite.
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I decided to stop trying to get the job
and just tell the story.
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Isn't that great?
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See, that's confidence.
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It just doesn't always look the way we
imagine.
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Now let's talk about the strange
paradox of our profession.
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Actors spend years learning how to
become more emotionally available.
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We study behavior, relationships,
empathy, listening imagination.
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00:08:55,468 --> 00:09:01,608
We learn to cry, laugh, love, grieve,
celebrate, fear.
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00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:06,880
We train ourselves to experience life
more deeply.
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We then walk into an industry
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where people we've never met
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decide whether we continue,
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sometimes in five minutes,
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sometimes in thirty seconds,
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sometimes without saying a single word.
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If we're not careful, we've been
connecting our value as human beings
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to someone else's casting decision.
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And that's where confidence begins to
crack.
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Not because we lack talent,
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but because we've asked auditions to
answer questions.
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They were never designed to answer
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questions like, am I good enough?
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Do I belong here?
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Am I talented?
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Am I worthy?
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An audition
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can't answer those questions.
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00:09:55,628 --> 00:09:56,629
They never could.
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00:09:57,397 --> 00:10:01,768
Yet, many actors unknowingly asked them
every single week.
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00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:06,72
So why does rejection hurt so much?
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00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:11,344
Have you ever wondered why rejection
feels so personal,
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00:10:12,412 --> 00:10:15,515
even when everyone tells you don't take
it personally
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well.
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there's actually a reason
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our brains evolved in communities
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00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:25,759
thousands of years ago,
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being rejected by the tribe, wasn't
merely uncomfortable.
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00:10:30,497 --> 00:10:31,664
It could be dangerous,
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00:10:32,732 --> 00:10:34,734
acceptance, meant survival,
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00:10:35,201 --> 00:10:36,169
belonging,
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00:10:36,436 --> 00:10:37,437
meant safety,
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00:10:38,104 --> 00:10:39,506
isolation, meant risk.
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00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:43,843
So today, when we walk into an audition,
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our nervous system sometimes reacts as
though our survival
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depends on the outcome.
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00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:51,685
Of course it doesn't.
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00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,119
But
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00:10:53,620 --> 00:10:58,425
our ancient wiring doesn't always know
that, which means sometimes you're not
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lacking confidence.
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00:11:00,193 --> 00:11:04,798
Sometimes you're simply having a very
human biological response.
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00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:09,936
I don't know about you, but I find that
strangely comfortable
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00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:11,871
it's very comforting.
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00:11:13,139 --> 00:11:17,77
It reminds me that feeling nervous
doesn't mean something is wrong with
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00:11:17,143 --> 00:11:17,310
me.
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00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:19,45
It means I'm human,
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00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:20,480
and so are you.
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00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:23,983
But this is where we get it wrong.
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00:11:25,51 --> 00:11:25,919
This is where
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00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:30,90
actors accidentally make life much
harder
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00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:31,691
than it needs to be.
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00:11:32,892 --> 00:11:35,195
We believe confidence comes first,
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00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:37,130
then
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00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:38,732
we become courageous.
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00:11:39,799 --> 00:11:42,235
But life doesn't actually work that way.
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00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:45,138
I want you to think back to your first
audition.
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00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:46,873
Were you confident?
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00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:48,475
Probably not.
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00:11:48,808 --> 00:11:48,975
You.
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00:11:49,75 --> 00:11:50,410
First on camera, class
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00:11:50,910 --> 00:11:53,913
your first call back, your first
professional job,
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00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:56,649
your first day on a television set.
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00:11:57,784 --> 00:12:00,954
Confidence probably wasn't leading the
way
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00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:02,722
courage was.
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00:12:03,790 --> 00:12:05,125
You showed up anyway,
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00:12:06,192 --> 00:12:10,397
you were nervous, anyway, you took the
risk anyway.
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00:12:11,297 --> 00:12:12,165
And afterward,
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00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:15,35
you discovered something remarkable.
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00:12:16,336 --> 00:12:17,103
You survived.
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00:12:19,72 --> 00:12:19,706
And guess what?
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00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:21,307
You did it again and again.
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00:12:21,775 --> 00:12:24,811
And eventually, confidence quietly
arrived,
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00:12:25,545 --> 00:12:26,813
not because fear disappeared,
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00:12:28,181 --> 00:12:32,385
but because experience slowly replaced
uncertainty.
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00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:35,722
And that is a very different definition
of confidence.
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00:12:36,423 --> 00:12:37,123
And I think,
247
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:39,526
well, I think it's a much kinder one.
248
00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:45,298
You know, there's another word that I
think gets confused with confidence all
249
00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:47,367
the time, and that's self esteem.
250
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,237
Most people use those words as though
they mean the same thing.
251
00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:51,838
They don't.
252
00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:53,773
Confidence says,
253
00:12:54,341 --> 00:12:56,9
I believe I can do this.
254
00:12:56,976 --> 00:12:58,411
Self esteem says,
255
00:12:58,978 --> 00:13:00,513
I believe I'm still valuable,
256
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:02,882
even if I don't
257
00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:05,585
think about that for a minute.
258
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:08,955
Those are two entirely different
conversations.
259
00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:11,524
One is about performance,
260
00:13:12,359 --> 00:13:12,959
the other
261
00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:14,728
is about identity.
262
00:13:15,862 --> 00:13:17,864
And here's where actors sometimes get
into trouble
263
00:13:18,898 --> 00:13:20,33
without realizing it.
264
00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:24,4
We allow our confidence to become
attached to our self esteem.
265
00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:27,207
If the audition goes, well, I feel
great.
266
00:13:27,941 --> 00:13:29,609
If the callback doesn't come,
267
00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:31,845
I must not be good enough.
268
00:13:33,380 --> 00:13:37,584
Now our self worth is writing on
someone else's decision?
269
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,153
Well, that's a dangerous place to live.
270
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:44,624
Because confidence naturally rises and
Falls.
271
00:13:45,225 --> 00:13:46,92
That's normal.
272
00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:49,763
Even athletes have good days and bad
days.
273
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:53,933
Hm, musicians have off performances.
274
00:13:55,235 --> 00:13:57,70
Writers stare at blank pages.
275
00:13:57,537 --> 00:14:00,807
Teachers have classes that don't quite
connect.
276
00:14:01,474 --> 00:14:02,575
I know what that feels like.
277
00:14:02,676 --> 00:14:03,343
Sometimes
278
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:04,978
we're all human.
279
00:14:05,612 --> 00:14:10,417
But if your self esteem rises and Falls
with every audition, you're asking your
280
00:14:10,583 --> 00:14:14,87
career to answer questions that only
you can answer.
281
00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:16,656
Let's talk about something else.
282
00:14:18,91 --> 00:14:23,29
Have you ever noticed how often actors
talk about confidence as though it is a feeling?
283
00:14:24,30 --> 00:14:26,266
I just don't feel confident to day.
284
00:14:26,332 --> 00:14:28,335
I wish I felt more confident.
285
00:14:28,668 --> 00:14:30,236
I lost my confidence.
286
00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:33,73
Hm, maybe
287
00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:37,911
or maybe confidence isn't a feeling at
all.
288
00:14:39,145 --> 00:14:40,947
Maybe it's a decision.
289
00:14:42,916 --> 00:14:44,150
Think about your own life.
290
00:14:44,918 --> 00:14:48,621
Have you ever done something while
feeling completely unprepared?
291
00:14:49,456 --> 00:14:50,390
Of course you have.
292
00:14:51,291 --> 00:14:54,694
Have you ever walked into an audition,
terrified
293
00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:58,64
and ended up doing some of your best
work?
294
00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:00,200
I certainly.
295
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:00,633
Have.
296
00:15:01,935 --> 00:15:07,140
Have you ever taught a class or given a
speech, ammet someone important or
297
00:15:07,307 --> 00:15:11,678
starting something new, while secretly
wondering if you belonged there?
298
00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:13,780
Now most of us have had that feeling.
299
00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:18,685
So, apparently we don't need confidence
to act.
300
00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:20,487
We need courage.
301
00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:22,88
Confidence usually
302
00:15:23,156 --> 00:15:24,324
chose up afterward.
303
00:15:26,26 --> 00:15:29,863
One of my favorite observations comes
from years of watching actors before
304
00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:30,497
auditions.
305
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:37,437
i'll see an actor sitting quietly
outside the audition room.
306
00:15:38,672 --> 00:15:41,141
You know, when auditions were in
person, and they still are.
307
00:15:41,307 --> 00:15:44,944
Occasionally, mostly callbacks are in
person with our office.
308
00:15:46,179 --> 00:15:46,713
They don't,
309
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,549
actors don't do dramatic breathing
exercises,
310
00:15:51,51 --> 00:15:52,952
no pacing, no pep talks,
311
00:15:53,553 --> 00:15:55,355
just sitting present.
312
00:15:56,890 --> 00:15:59,192
And then another actor arrives.
313
00:16:00,427 --> 00:16:04,831
They're talking a mile a minute,
repeating the lines over and over,
314
00:16:05,65 --> 00:16:09,135
checking the mirror, changing jackets,
looking at every one else, comparing
315
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:12,806
themselves, trying to convince
themselves, they're ready
316
00:16:13,907 --> 00:16:14,574
now.
317
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,744
Can either one book the job?
318
00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:20,714
Absolutely.
319
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,415
But here's what I've noticed,
320
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:27,53
the quieter actor usually isn't trying
to eliminate nervousness.
321
00:16:27,854 --> 00:16:29,923
They're simply making peace with it.
322
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,158
There's a huge difference.
323
00:16:33,59 --> 00:16:35,562
Confidence doesn't require the absence
of nerves.
324
00:16:35,929 --> 00:16:39,999
It simply refuses to let nerves become
the director.
325
00:16:42,102 --> 00:16:46,239
That reminds me of something I tell
actors in class, nervousness isn't your enemy.
326
00:16:46,740 --> 00:16:49,275
It isn't it's your body's way of saying
327
00:16:49,876 --> 00:16:50,710
this matters
328
00:16:51,945 --> 00:16:52,645
it's important.
329
00:16:54,581 --> 00:16:55,215
That's all.
330
00:16:56,416 --> 00:16:57,83
You see somewhere.
331
00:16:57,384 --> 00:17:01,121
Along the way, we decided nervousness
meant weakness,
332
00:17:02,188 --> 00:17:02,889
it doesn't.
333
00:17:03,390 --> 00:17:04,324
It means you care.
334
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:07,827
The goal isn't to stop caring.
335
00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:13,133
The goal is to stop interpreting caring
as failure.
336
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,368
We're going to have more
337
00:17:15,935 --> 00:17:16,970
right after this.
338
00:17:19,239 --> 00:17:21,608
Now I would like to share something
339
00:17:21,941 --> 00:17:22,742
a little more personal.
340
00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:25,612
I don't usually do this, but over the
years,
341
00:17:26,112 --> 00:17:31,51
I have spoken openly about something
that made an enormous difference in my
342
00:17:31,51 --> 00:17:31,685
own life,
343
00:17:32,786 --> 00:17:33,586
therapy.
344
00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:39,693
And I know for some people that word
still carries unnecessary baggage.
345
00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:41,428
It shouldn't,
346
00:17:42,662 --> 00:17:47,33
for me, therapy wasn't about fixing
something that was broken.
347
00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:49,602
It wasn't about discovering
348
00:17:50,36 --> 00:17:52,305
that I was somehow less capable.
349
00:17:53,473 --> 00:17:57,277
It was about understanding myself more
honestly.
350
00:17:58,345 --> 00:18:02,248
It helped me recognize old studies
stories I had been telling myself,
351
00:18:02,916 --> 00:18:04,784
you know, stories about worth,
352
00:18:05,552 --> 00:18:07,53
stories about success,
353
00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:08,655
stories about approval.
354
00:18:09,622 --> 00:18:13,126
And some of those stories had been
following me for decades.
355
00:18:14,494 --> 00:18:18,865
And here's the interesting thing, most
of us don't even realize we're carrying them.
356
00:18:19,232 --> 00:18:19,933
We simply assume
357
00:18:21,0 --> 00:18:21,768
they're true.
358
00:18:23,370 --> 00:18:24,170
Therapy
359
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:26,873
helped me ask a different
360
00:18:27,207 --> 00:18:28,8
question,
361
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:30,243
the question,
362
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:32,946
is that actually true?
363
00:18:34,748 --> 00:18:36,783
Sometimes the answer was, yes.
364
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:38,251
Often
365
00:18:38,918 --> 00:18:39,519
it wasn't.
366
00:18:40,353 --> 00:18:41,588
That realization was in
367
00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:43,990
an incredible feeling
368
00:18:44,891 --> 00:18:45,859
and very freeing.
369
00:18:46,659 --> 00:18:50,730
Because once you stop believing every
thought that enters your mind,
370
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:55,1
those thoughts begin losing their
authority over you.
371
00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:56,469
And that changes
372
00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:57,604
everything.
373
00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:01,141
Now, I want to be really clear here.
374
00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:04,344
I am not suggesting every actor must
have therapy,
375
00:19:05,378 --> 00:19:08,415
but I do believe every actor should
become deeply curious
376
00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:10,383
about themselves.
377
00:19:11,618 --> 00:19:13,119
Where does your fear come from?
378
00:19:18,992 --> 00:19:23,830
Why does one audition ruin your week
while another simply rolls off your shoulders?
379
00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:28,468
Why does one piece of criticism
motivate you, while another
380
00:19:28,835 --> 00:19:30,70
feels devastating?
381
00:19:31,71 --> 00:19:32,272
Those aren't acting questions.
382
00:19:32,972 --> 00:19:34,574
Those are human questions.
383
00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:39,45
And understanding them will make you
not only a healthier actor,
384
00:19:39,713 --> 00:19:41,614
but a healthier person.
385
00:19:42,582 --> 00:19:43,850
I honestly believe that.
386
00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:49,756
And here's something I've noticed after
many years in this profession.
387
00:19:50,990 --> 00:19:55,362
The actors who have the longest careers
aren't necessarily the most talented.
388
00:19:56,596 --> 00:19:57,931
Now that surprises people.
389
00:19:58,431 --> 00:19:59,666
They're certainly talented.
390
00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:00,967
But that's not what
391
00:20:01,401 --> 00:20:02,602
keeps them working.
392
00:20:03,303 --> 00:20:04,804
What keeps them working
393
00:20:05,71 --> 00:20:06,72
is resilience,
394
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:07,507
perspective
395
00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:09,409
professionalism,
396
00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:11,511
curiosity.
397
00:20:12,345 --> 00:20:13,313
They recover quickly.
398
00:20:13,613 --> 00:20:16,783
They don't spend six months replaying
one audition.
399
00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:18,385
They learn,
400
00:20:18,752 --> 00:20:20,320
adjust, move forward.
401
00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:24,324
Now that's confidence not because they
never hurt,
402
00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:26,760
because they don't stay hurt.
403
00:20:27,60 --> 00:20:27,994
That's the difference.
404
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:32,265
Here's another casting room observation
405
00:20:33,299 --> 00:20:36,503
that still, well, it still surprises me
after all these years.
406
00:20:36,970 --> 00:20:41,608
Occasionally an actor leaves the room
convinced they gave a terrible audition.
407
00:20:42,676 --> 00:20:45,912
I've even had actors apologize on the
way out.
408
00:20:47,213 --> 00:20:48,48
I'm so sorry.
409
00:20:48,348 --> 00:20:49,449
I don't know what happened.
410
00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:54,721
And then the creative team turns to me
and says, I love them.
411
00:20:56,656 --> 00:20:58,591
I've seen it happen more than I can
count.
412
00:20:58,892 --> 00:21:02,896
I've also seen the opposite, an actor
who walks out, absolutely convinced
413
00:21:03,296 --> 00:21:03,997
they booked it.
414
00:21:04,831 --> 00:21:06,66
They call their agent,
415
00:21:06,499 --> 00:21:07,534
they celebrate.
416
00:21:08,835 --> 00:21:11,504
Then the role goes another direction.
417
00:21:12,806 --> 00:21:13,606
Why?
418
00:21:14,674 --> 00:21:15,842
Because we're
419
00:21:16,409 --> 00:21:19,45
often the worst Judges of our own work.
420
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:21,915
Tw, too close to it.
421
00:21:23,216 --> 00:21:25,752
We confuse feelings with facts.
422
00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:29,622
Feeling uncertain doesn't mean you
performed poorly.
423
00:21:30,190 --> 00:21:33,126
Feeling confident doesn't guarantee
success.
424
00:21:33,860 --> 00:21:39,532
That's why I encourage actors to stop
grading themselves after every audition.
425
00:21:40,333 --> 00:21:42,402
Do the work, learn from it,
426
00:21:42,902 --> 00:21:44,4
then let it go.
427
00:21:44,904 --> 00:21:46,406
You may be a wonderful actor,
428
00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:47,374
but
429
00:21:47,941 --> 00:21:51,211
you're not the best casting director of
your own performance.
430
00:21:51,878 --> 00:21:52,946
I can promise you that.
431
00:21:54,914 --> 00:22:00,487
So this brings me to what I believe may
be the most important idea in today's episode.
432
00:22:01,454 --> 00:22:03,690
Stop trying to be more confident,
433
00:22:04,891 --> 00:22:06,393
become more trustworthy.
434
00:22:07,694 --> 00:22:10,997
Now I know, I know that sounds kind of
weird, but stay with me.
435
00:22:11,231 --> 00:22:12,799
Imagine you had a friend.
436
00:22:13,633 --> 00:22:17,270
Every time they promised something,
they followed through,
437
00:22:18,104 --> 00:22:18,705
every time
438
00:22:19,305 --> 00:22:20,640
they said they'd call,
439
00:22:21,241 --> 00:22:21,908
they called.
440
00:22:23,376 --> 00:22:24,644
If they said they'd help,
441
00:22:25,945 --> 00:22:26,546
they helped.
442
00:22:27,614 --> 00:22:28,348
If they made a mistake,
443
00:22:29,449 --> 00:22:30,383
they admitted.
444
00:22:31,51 --> 00:22:34,888
If life knocked them down, they
eventually got back up.
445
00:22:36,189 --> 00:22:38,91
Would you trust that person?
446
00:22:39,225 --> 00:22:40,160
Of course you would.
447
00:22:41,161 --> 00:22:41,461
Of course.
448
00:22:41,695 --> 00:22:47,667
Now here's the question though, can you
become that person for yourself?
449
00:22:48,568 --> 00:22:51,204
Because every time you keep a promise
to yourself,
450
00:22:52,272 --> 00:22:53,773
you build self trust.
451
00:22:54,274 --> 00:22:56,810
Every time you prepare when you said
you would,
452
00:22:57,777 --> 00:22:59,45
you build self trust.
453
00:23:00,113 --> 00:23:03,850
Every time you recover from
disappointment, instead of giving up,
454
00:23:04,117 --> 00:23:05,452
you build self trust.
455
00:23:06,653 --> 00:23:10,590
Every time you walk into another
audition, despite being afraid,
456
00:23:11,624 --> 00:23:13,293
and build self trust.
457
00:23:14,594 --> 00:23:17,263
And something remarkable begins to
happen.
458
00:23:17,764 --> 00:23:18,64
Confidence
459
00:23:19,65 --> 00:23:20,333
quietly follows
460
00:23:21,234 --> 00:23:25,238
not because you forced it, not because
you repeated affirmations in the
461
00:23:25,238 --> 00:23:26,873
mirror, but because
462
00:23:27,774 --> 00:23:28,641
you become
463
00:23:29,142 --> 00:23:31,778
some one your own mind has learned.
464
00:23:32,178 --> 00:23:33,613
It can rely on
465
00:23:36,416 --> 00:23:36,583
honestly.
466
00:23:36,983 --> 00:23:39,352
I think that's far more powerful, don't
you?
467
00:23:39,853 --> 00:23:41,388
To day's episode all about confidence.
468
00:23:41,721 --> 00:23:42,355
And you know what?
469
00:23:42,422 --> 00:23:45,125
The older I get, the more I realize
that confidence
470
00:23:45,458 --> 00:23:47,394
isn't something I've finally achieved.
471
00:23:47,794 --> 00:23:49,763
It's something I continue to practise.
472
00:23:50,497 --> 00:23:51,364
Some days it's
473
00:23:51,698 --> 00:23:52,599
stronger than others.
474
00:23:52,732 --> 00:23:55,669
Some days I feel completely connected
to my work.
475
00:23:56,503 --> 00:23:59,205
Other days I question myself, just like
anyone else.
476
00:23:59,706 --> 00:24:00,507
And you know what?
477
00:24:01,74 --> 00:24:02,575
That's perfectly normal.
478
00:24:03,309 --> 00:24:05,111
Confidence isn't a destination.
479
00:24:06,12 --> 00:24:06,346
It's a relationship
480
00:24:07,714 --> 00:24:10,717
we return to over and over again.
481
00:24:12,18 --> 00:24:14,254
Now let's think about children for a
moment.
482
00:24:15,155 --> 00:24:17,590
Have you ever watched a toddler learn
to walk?
483
00:24:19,559 --> 00:24:20,660
It's so cool, right?
484
00:24:20,994 --> 00:24:24,998
They stand up, they wobble, they fall,
they cry for about three seconds.
485
00:24:26,99 --> 00:24:27,834
Then they stand up
486
00:24:28,101 --> 00:24:29,269
and do it again.
487
00:24:30,170 --> 00:24:32,472
No one has to convince them their
488
00:24:33,139 --> 00:24:33,707
walking material.
489
00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:35,642
They don't decide.
490
00:24:35,875 --> 00:24:38,745
After the third fall, maybe walking
just isn't for me.
491
00:24:39,479 --> 00:24:40,480
Can you imagine?
492
00:24:40,814 --> 00:24:42,282
I fallen four times to day?
493
00:24:42,515 --> 00:24:45,452
I think i'll pursue crawling
professionally?
494
00:24:46,653 --> 00:24:47,187
Of course not.
495
00:24:48,488 --> 00:24:49,856
We laugh because it sounds ridiculous.
496
00:24:50,890 --> 00:24:54,94
But as adults, we do exactly that.
497
00:24:54,994 --> 00:24:55,695
One difficult audition,
498
00:24:56,830 --> 00:25:01,67
one critical review, one rejection, one
callback that doesn't happen.
499
00:25:01,701 --> 00:25:06,239
And suddenly we begin questioning
whether we belong in the profession at all.
500
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:08,641
What changed?
501
00:25:09,142 --> 00:25:10,243
Not our ability,
502
00:25:10,910 --> 00:25:12,12
our interpretation.
503
00:25:13,613 --> 00:25:14,881
Interpret falling
504
00:25:15,215 --> 00:25:16,316
as learning
505
00:25:16,816 --> 00:25:18,718
adults often interpret falling
506
00:25:19,386 --> 00:25:20,153
as failing.
507
00:25:21,154 --> 00:25:22,889
There's a tremendous difference.
508
00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:26,993
Ay, here's another thought.
509
00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,897
Actors spend enormous amounts of time
trying to eliminate uncertainty.
510
00:25:32,265 --> 00:25:35,535
I'll feel confident once I know exactly
what they want.
511
00:25:36,903 --> 00:25:40,6
I'll feel confident once I have a
better agent.
512
00:25:40,740 --> 00:25:43,677
I'll feel confident after I book my
next role.
513
00:25:44,978 --> 00:25:46,246
But the truth is,
514
00:25:47,213 --> 00:25:49,916
certainty is in part of our profession.
515
00:25:50,583 --> 00:25:51,518
It never has been.
516
00:25:52,352 --> 00:25:53,553
Every audition is uncertain.
517
00:25:53,953 --> 00:25:55,155
Every call back is uncertain.
518
00:25:55,789 --> 00:25:56,256
Every contract
519
00:25:57,390 --> 00:25:58,558
is uncertain.
520
00:25:59,225 --> 00:26:00,794
Every career is uncertain.
521
00:26:01,227 --> 00:26:02,262
Confidence isn't learning
522
00:26:03,463 --> 00:26:05,131
to control uncertainty
523
00:26:05,799 --> 00:26:08,268
it's learning to function beautifully
inside.
524
00:26:08,568 --> 00:26:10,570
It that's what professionals do.
525
00:26:12,272 --> 00:26:14,407
Here's another casting room observation.
526
00:26:15,208 --> 00:26:18,745
I have to say, one of the greatest
privileges of my career has been
527
00:26:18,912 --> 00:26:21,748
watching extraordinary actors work.
528
00:26:23,383 --> 00:26:24,651
Some have won awards.
529
00:26:25,385 --> 00:26:26,753
Some became household names.
530
00:26:27,220 --> 00:26:30,557
Some built wonderful careers without
ever becoming famous.
531
00:26:31,458 --> 00:26:33,126
Do you know what they all had in common?
532
00:26:33,693 --> 00:26:34,728
Not perfection
533
00:26:35,528 --> 00:26:36,529
professionalism.
534
00:26:37,864 --> 00:26:39,32
They arrived prepared.
535
00:26:39,532 --> 00:26:40,333
They listened, they collaborated,
536
00:26:41,468 --> 00:26:42,569
they adjusted,
537
00:26:43,69 --> 00:26:44,471
they remained curious.
538
00:26:45,872 --> 00:26:50,243
Most importantly, they didn't spend all
of their energy trying to prove themselves.
539
00:26:51,77 --> 00:26:53,613
They spent it serving the story
540
00:26:55,215 --> 00:26:56,282
listen that's worth repeating.
541
00:26:56,583 --> 00:26:59,486
They weren't trying to prove they
deserved the role.
542
00:26:59,719 --> 00:27:02,255
They were trying trying to understand
the character
543
00:27:03,223 --> 00:27:04,157
that's simpler
544
00:27:04,791 --> 00:27:05,125
that's
545
00:27:05,458 --> 00:27:06,559
much more pure.
546
00:27:07,627 --> 00:27:10,230
Those are two completely different
energies.
547
00:27:11,64 --> 00:27:13,133
And believe me, people in the room,
548
00:27:13,466 --> 00:27:14,734
they can feel the difference.
549
00:27:16,436 --> 00:27:19,539
So let's talk about something that took
me a very long time to understand.
550
00:27:20,106 --> 00:27:22,842
Confidence is in something another
person gives you.
551
00:27:23,76 --> 00:27:27,547
By the way, it might, coming from your
agent, not your acting teacher, not
552
00:27:27,714 --> 00:27:29,749
your spouse, not your audience,
553
00:27:30,16 --> 00:27:33,453
not your casting director or podcast
host.
554
00:27:34,921 --> 00:27:37,757
We can encourage you, we can believe in
you.
555
00:27:38,91 --> 00:27:39,526
We can even hire you.
556
00:27:39,959 --> 00:27:42,262
But none of us can hand you confidence.
557
00:27:43,396 --> 00:27:46,733
Because confidence doesn't arrive from
the outside.
558
00:27:47,300 --> 00:27:49,602
It grows quietly from the inside
559
00:27:50,36 --> 00:27:51,538
every time you honor the commitments
560
00:27:52,572 --> 00:27:53,907
you've made to yourself.
561
00:27:55,375 --> 00:27:58,244
So how do we actually build that
relationship?
562
00:27:58,812 --> 00:28:02,982
So I'm going to offer you five very
simple practices, not because they'll
563
00:28:03,149 --> 00:28:06,386
make you fearless, but because they'll
make you trustworthy.
564
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:07,187
First,
565
00:28:07,954 --> 00:28:09,589
keep promises to yourself,
566
00:28:10,657 --> 00:28:13,293
yeah, if you tell yourself you're going
to prepare,
567
00:28:14,94 --> 00:28:14,728
prepare.
568
00:28:15,228 --> 00:28:17,597
If you schedule time to read a play,
569
00:28:18,431 --> 00:28:19,32
read it.
570
00:28:19,399 --> 00:28:22,736
If you promise yourself, you'll submit
that self tape
571
00:28:23,536 --> 00:28:24,304
submit it
572
00:28:25,538 --> 00:28:25,705
self.
573
00:28:25,939 --> 00:28:28,641
Trust grows through consistency.
574
00:28:30,76 --> 00:28:30,710
Second,
575
00:28:31,378 --> 00:28:33,113
separate effort from outcome.
576
00:28:34,347 --> 00:28:36,16
You control your preparation.
577
00:28:36,516 --> 00:28:37,317
You control your professionalism.
578
00:28:38,585 --> 00:28:40,620
You control your imagination.
579
00:28:41,388 --> 00:28:44,157
You do not control the final decision.
580
00:28:44,758 --> 00:28:49,796
Stop measuring yourself by things you
never had the power to control in the
581
00:28:49,796 --> 00:28:50,397
first place.
582
00:28:52,465 --> 00:28:52,799
Third,
583
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:55,35
collect evidence.
584
00:28:56,569 --> 00:28:59,39
Instead of asking, why am I not
confident?
585
00:28:59,706 --> 00:29:02,409
Ask what evidence have I earned?
586
00:29:03,376 --> 00:29:04,644
Have you trained?
587
00:29:05,612 --> 00:29:06,346
Have you improved?
588
00:29:06,980 --> 00:29:09,149
Have you survived difficult auditions?
589
00:29:09,616 --> 00:29:10,917
Have you booked work before?
590
00:29:11,718 --> 00:29:13,286
Have you made people laugh,
591
00:29:14,87 --> 00:29:14,888
cry?
592
00:29:15,355 --> 00:29:15,855
Think
593
00:29:16,656 --> 00:29:17,424
then
594
00:29:17,957 --> 00:29:18,124
yes.
595
00:29:18,358 --> 00:29:18,558
What
596
00:29:19,292 --> 00:29:21,428
you already have evidence?
597
00:29:22,328 --> 00:29:24,798
Your mind simply forgets to look for it.
598
00:29:26,99 --> 00:29:27,834
4th, celebrate courage,
599
00:29:28,835 --> 00:29:29,769
not just success,
600
00:29:31,71 --> 00:29:32,38
walking into the room.
601
00:29:32,172 --> 00:29:32,639
Matters,
602
00:29:33,306 --> 00:29:35,41
sending the self tape, matters,
603
00:29:35,375 --> 00:29:36,943
taking the class, matters
604
00:29:37,377 --> 00:29:38,278
trying again.
605
00:29:38,745 --> 00:29:41,748
Matters, the industry celebrates
bookings.
606
00:29:42,248 --> 00:29:45,919
I think we should celebrate bravery,
because bravery
607
00:29:46,653 --> 00:29:46,853
is available
608
00:29:47,854 --> 00:29:49,189
every day.
609
00:29:50,256 --> 00:29:52,325
And finally, stay curious.
610
00:29:53,426 --> 00:29:53,727
Curiosity
611
00:29:54,594 --> 00:29:56,429
leaves very little room for fear.
612
00:29:56,896 --> 00:29:59,566
Instead of wondering, what do they
think of me?
613
00:29:59,699 --> 00:30:03,837
Try asking, what can I discover about
this character?
614
00:30:04,571 --> 00:30:07,40
Instead of asking, what if I fail?
615
00:30:07,507 --> 00:30:08,8
Ask,
616
00:30:08,508 --> 00:30:10,76
what if I surprise myself?
617
00:30:10,977 --> 00:30:14,714
Curiosity is one of the healthiest
forms of confidence I know.
618
00:30:16,182 --> 00:30:18,551
So here's your reset for this week,
619
00:30:19,52 --> 00:30:22,989
for just seven days stop asking
yourself, do I feel confident?
620
00:30:23,623 --> 00:30:26,826
Instead ask, what do I trust about
myself?
621
00:30:27,60 --> 00:30:27,694
To day?
622
00:30:28,495 --> 00:30:30,563
Maybe to day you trust your preparation.
623
00:30:31,131 --> 00:30:33,600
Maybe to day you trust your work ethic.
624
00:30:35,301 --> 00:30:39,506
Maybe to day you trust your sense of
humor, your imagination,
625
00:30:40,106 --> 00:30:40,340
your resilience,
626
00:30:41,374 --> 00:30:42,342
your kindness, your professionalism,
627
00:30:43,543 --> 00:30:45,745
your ability to begin again.
628
00:30:46,346 --> 00:30:49,749
Because confidence isn't the only thing
worth trusting.
629
00:30:50,550 --> 00:30:51,184
Sometimes
630
00:30:51,718 --> 00:30:53,920
trusting yourself is enough.
631
00:30:55,555 --> 00:31:00,160
And in my experience, that's exactly
where confidence begins.
632
00:31:02,729 --> 00:31:06,232
Now listen, before we wrap this up, I'd
like to leave you with a
633
00:31:06,599 --> 00:31:07,667
final image.
634
00:31:08,268 --> 00:31:08,835
Imagine confidence
635
00:31:09,936 --> 00:31:11,37
as a shadow.
636
00:31:12,172 --> 00:31:13,540
Have you ever tried to catch your own
shadow?
637
00:31:14,841 --> 00:31:15,241
You can't.
638
00:31:15,942 --> 00:31:19,212
The harder you chase it, the further
away it seems.
639
00:31:20,13 --> 00:31:26,52
But the moment you simply begin walking
toward the light, your shadow follows automatically.
640
00:31:27,220 --> 00:31:29,589
Confidence works much the same way.
641
00:31:30,357 --> 00:31:35,28
If you chase confidence, you probably
spend your life wondering where it went.
642
00:31:35,862 --> 00:31:38,398
But if you walk toward growth,
643
00:31:39,199 --> 00:31:40,166
preparation,
644
00:31:41,134 --> 00:31:41,434
curiosity,
645
00:31:42,502 --> 00:31:44,304
service and self trust,
646
00:31:45,472 --> 00:31:48,641
confidence quietly follows behind you.
647
00:31:49,776 --> 00:31:51,211
Well, not because you chased it.
648
00:31:51,778 --> 00:31:53,446
Because it was never the destination.
649
00:31:54,114 --> 00:31:56,483
It was always the companion.
650
00:31:58,251 --> 00:32:01,588
So the next time someone tells, you
just be more confident.
651
00:32:02,255 --> 00:32:03,356
I hope you'll smile.
652
00:32:04,90 --> 00:32:06,226
Because now you know something a little
different.
653
00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:08,828
Confidence isn't pretending you're
fearless.
654
00:32:09,396 --> 00:32:12,265
Confidence isn't believing you'll book
every rle.
655
00:32:12,665 --> 00:32:15,402
Confidence isn't walking into a room
trying to impress everyone.
656
00:32:16,169 --> 00:32:20,206
Confidence is walking into a room
knowing this one audition doesn't
657
00:32:20,340 --> 00:32:21,608
determine your worth.
658
00:32:22,509 --> 00:32:26,179
Confidence is trusting your
preparation, trusting your craft,
659
00:32:26,813 --> 00:32:27,614
trusting your imagination,
660
00:32:28,815 --> 00:32:32,152
trusting your resilience and most
importantly,
661
00:32:32,752 --> 00:32:33,586
trusting yourself.
662
00:32:36,489 --> 00:32:39,325
Thank you so much for spending this
time with me.
663
00:32:39,392 --> 00:32:43,530
To day, if today's conversation
resonated with you, I'd love for you to
664
00:32:43,530 --> 00:32:46,866
share this episode with another actor
who may need to hear it.
665
00:32:48,334 --> 00:32:52,505
Also, it would be amazing if you
enjoyed this episode, if it gave you
666
00:32:52,505 --> 00:32:55,942
some insight, if it helped you just a
little bit, won't you consider leaving
667
00:32:56,176 --> 00:32:57,277
me a review?
668
00:32:58,111 --> 00:32:58,978
ITunes or Spotify,
669
00:33:00,13 --> 00:33:01,881
those are really great help to me.
670
00:33:01,948 --> 00:33:03,983
I don't charge for the information here,
671
00:33:04,351 --> 00:33:05,919
but I would love some feedback.
672
00:33:06,419 --> 00:33:08,988
So please let me know if you found this
episode helpful.
673
00:33:09,222 --> 00:33:11,324
You can also write to me with
additional questions.
674
00:33:11,858 --> 00:33:16,996
Casting actor's caste at Gmail dot com,
casting actress Cass all one word at
675
00:33:16,996 --> 00:33:18,64
Gmail dot community
676
00:33:18,431 --> 00:33:21,935
and the webside casting actor's cast
outcome is another place where you can
677
00:33:22,168 --> 00:33:23,503
reach me if you'd like to.
678
00:33:24,170 --> 00:33:28,8
And remember, the world doesn't need
actors who never feel fear
679
00:33:28,174 --> 00:33:32,946
and needs actors who have learned not
to let fear make their decisions.
680
00:33:34,681 --> 00:33:35,315
I'm Jeff drizeback.
681
00:33:35,782 --> 00:33:38,818
Thank you for listening to casting
actors cast until next time.
682
00:33:38,918 --> 00:33:40,754
I want you to keep learning, keep
growing.
683
00:33:41,388 --> 00:33:43,690
Keep telling stories that matter.
684
00:33:44,257 --> 00:33:48,328
And remember, the audition is not
asking, how confident are you?
685
00:33:49,62 --> 00:33:52,966
It's asking, can I trust you with this
story?
686
00:33:54,267 --> 00:33:55,535
I'll see you next
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