(This episode was automatically transcribed into digital text, some errors may present.)

Patrick Oliver Jones:

When it comes to to-do lists, as much as they can keep us organized and on task, they can also become overwhelming and never-ending. They can turn into a long-running order of what's next on the agenda, and finishing one thing only means that you now have something else to do. But sometimes, like right now in my own life, I avoid the to-do list. I choose to do other things that are either more fun or more interesting. Or I choose to do nothing at all. And now I'm going on 6 months of unemployment since my last show, and while having downtime can certainly be good, and I welcome that, it can also become its own habit of going to bed late, waking up late, constantly snacking and munching. Working an hour on a self-tape, but then slacking off the rest of the day.

If I'm being completely honest, self-motivation and discipline have always been difficult for me, while doing what's comfortable is all too easy. Whether it's fear or doubt or, or just plain laziness, I can lose sight of what's important and what needs to be done. But then a guest comes along who is driven and motivated and accomplished, someone who reminds me what it means to be an artist and why I'm doing this in the first place. And having a sense of humor about it all can certainly help as well.

Sydney Kane:

Hi, I'm Sydney Kane, 5'2. Uh, um, I'm from Dallas, Texas, but I currently now live back and forth between Los Angeles and New York. And I am an actress, writer, comedian, Instagram poster human being. I hate it when people say that.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Sydney is such a versatile artist and, as you can hear, is also a funny person to be around. You can find her performing on various stages from Off-Off-Broadway to LA, as well as on your phone screen on various social media apps. And from her experiences, she has a few things to say about college musical theater programs and the importance of embracing authenticity in our work, as well as how she turned her own dating disasters into a one-woman original musical comedy show called Wife Material. And something that really stuck with me, we also discuss getting off your butt, not waiting for opportunities to come to you, and instead getting out there and creating them for yourself. Sometimes we all need a swift kick in the pants, and Sydney, is just the person to do it. I'm Patrick Oliver Jones, and you're listening to Why I'll Never Make It.

Sydney Kane:

Community is like the only way that you're gonna get any sort of like fulfillment. For me, like having people that you love, that you want to work with, or that you can lean on to help, like I think that that's so important. No one does this alone. They don't. I've like, they just don't.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, welcome, Sydney. It is so great to have you here on the podcast. Thanks for being here.

Sydney Kane:

Thanks for having me.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Absolutely. Well, I want to dive in because one of my first professional shows was Joseph, and that was your introduction into theater when you were 6 years old. Now, what exactly were you doing at 6 years old in Joseph?

Sydney Kane:

Um, I was one of the— you know, they have the little school kids in those? I was one of those. I— that's all I was. I had the cutest little uniform. Um, we looked like Princess Diaries, like, uniform kids, you know? Um, and we would walk on, sing, like, a couple songs, like, whenever the narrators— 3 narrators, by the way, not just one, there were 3.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

3?

Sydney Kane:

Narrators. Yeah, I don't know. I, like, I think about that production of Joseph, which is like the first theatrical experience I really ever had. And like, after then hearing about Joseph after that, you know, there's one narrator. Like, I remember like later on as I like got more into theater, I learned about it and I'm like, where are the rest of them? Like, I was like, there's 3. And my friends are all like, what are you talking about? Like, you know, there's like the hot one and then there's like the nerdy one and then there's like the normal one, like Powerpuff Girls kind of. And then they were like, that's not a thing.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

I mean, I have heard of duos, you know, where it's a guy and a girl and they're like, it's like a duet. Joseph. Yeah, I've heard of that before.

Sydney Kane:

And I've never heard that.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right.

Sydney Kane:

So why not?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. So were the 3 always together? Or did they all do different parts?

Sydney Kane:

Like paired off? Like, yeah, there was one that did like Potiphar's wife. And like, there were 3, like, it was funny. Like, there were also like interstitial scenes with it too. Like, I remember like, one of them kind of looked like Lisa Kudrow. She was so beautiful. I think lowkey, like, I had a massive crush on Joseph, and I had a big crush on that narrator too. And I was like, that was like a very— that was like my first ever, like, my sexual awakening was when I was 6 years old doing Joseph. Um, I'm kidding.

But I remember them there, like the 3 girls, and we would walk on stage. Was at this, uh, oh God, the Eisemann Center in Dallas, uh, Texas. And that was like the first, yeah, theater experience I ever had. It was with Richardson Children's Theater. And I still am friends with someone I met during that, like, to this day.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Wow.

Sydney Kane:

She has become like an older sister to me. Yeah, it was a great experience. But I just remember, yeah, we would just come on, do the songs, and then leave. And I remember being like upset, like, why don't I have a mic?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So did that give you the theater bug right away, or did it take a little while?

Sydney Kane:

You know, it did. But I would just get really upset if I— the thing that at that age, you know, I have really bad ADHD. And like, I'm just starting to get like medicated at that time. So it was almost like I really wanted to do theater. I just like didn't want to like rehearse or learn anything. I just like wanted to like get on stage and like do, sing and whatever. But like, you have to rehearse, Sydney, and you have to be— and I was just not that kid. But it did, it gave me the bug right away.

Sydney Kane:

I think I was a little scared of it, actually.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, yeah, yeah, because it, because it is daunting. Well, especially at that age. Like, you're excited about it because you love all the like, like the pretend and the costumes and everything.

Sydney Kane:

But yeah, but then you realize the work that Yeah, I'm like, oh, this is a lot of work. Okay. So I stepped away from that for a second. I would say I did theater one after the other, like Joseph. And then I remember I did other children's theater after that. But then I wanted to be a hip-hop dancer. I wanted to be a pop star. We all do venture off into different things.

But then when I got to high school, that's when I came back. to theater. We like went to a public school that has a really fantastic theater program. And actually the same director that I had when I was a kid doing all that theater, she worked at the high school that I ended up going to.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Wonderful. Wonderful. Yeah. I mean, speaking about just your career in general, you've kind of had a bunch of different type of stages that you performed at. There's off-off-off-off-Broadway. There's like the iPhone screen that we're all like performing on now. These various mediums that we now have of performing, what has that taught you about being an actor, about being a singer?

Sydney Kane:

Well, I feel like with theater, I mean, you're on stage. And there's so many technical elements that help tell the story, right? Especially even with film too. When you're filming on your iPhone, I feel like that's kind of why it's just important to just be authentic on your phone. It's like you have a tiny screen. It's weirdly like, I would say I feel more safe on a stage than I do on my iPhone because let's say like I have like a mustache or whatever one day, I forget to like pluck it, it'll be like there and like people can just like comment on that and it's just like you missed the point of the video, but it's totally fine. Just like, I feel like it's just more open. I mean, it just gets sent out everywhere. It can get taken out of context.

It can like, I don't know, I feel like a lot more vulnerable On the phone than I do on the stage. I'm definitely more comfortable being in a stage where people sit down, they watch you for an hour or so, and then, you know, they get to go home and they get to remember it rather than just like having it with you at all times. I'm grateful for it, but it's definitely scary.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's, it's one of those things, like you say, it's one of those that they can watch again, they can see again, they can take different things from it. They can take it, as you say, take it out of context.

Sydney Kane:

Takes this little moment too. I've had a couple people, like, sure, literally, like, have my face on their profile. And I'm like, hey, that's my— that's me. Take that down.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, I have that on Facebook once. I'm like, it's one thing to take Matt Damon and pretend you're him.

Sydney Kane:

I guess.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

But why are you trying to take me? Like, what is— what is that going to help you do or get something? I don't know.

Sydney Kane:

I don't know. I do think it's an amazing tool, though. I mean, it got me literally Instagram and TikTok or whatever. Like, that's like a huge reason as to why I'm doing things I'm doing now is, like, because of the platform it's given me. But I will say, like, when you go to go see something, if you see a movie, if you see a show on theater, like, that's, like, you can make fans out of that. Right now, you just have, like, I just have, like, followers, which, and they're great, and I love them, I think. Actually, I don't know them super well. Um, um, but, like, I'm learning as I'm going on, like, followers, like, are not fans.

Like, they're just, like, people can just follow you and, like, not come see your shows or not buy the things that you're putting out there or download your music or, you know, get tickets. You know what I mean? So it's just, it's so, it's a numbers game. So I definitely prefer the more long-form mediums of art.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. I was reading this article that was talking about how podcasters, how actors use social media. And it's certainly a way, as you say, to get followers, to put your name out there.

Sydney Kane:

It's a fantastic marketing tool.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. It's great at marketing. But it's great at marketing on Instagram, on TikTok. It doesn't push people off the platform. That's the whole point. It wants to keep you on the platform. So it doesn't push you necessarily to go see something or push you to go—

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, and they won't push the posts that you're doing that for anyway. You have to like— unless you're like—

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Unless you pay for them.

Sydney Kane:

Famous. Unless you pay for it, unless you have a connect to Instagram to get that wall off or whatever. But like, it's so crazy. Like, How that happens. It's insane. Like, I think until you reach like 200K to push a live show, it's always going to get shadowbanned kind of because it's people not— yeah, like you said, engaging with the app or whatever. It's crazy.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. The joys and the pitfalls of this digital age we're in.

Sydney Kane:

Literally, like doing these podcasts has been the best thing for my, quote, publicity because like, you know, you get to hear me talk for a long time. You get to actually hear my voice, even though it's kind of like raspy today.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

It's so good. I love a good alto rasp. It's always good.

Sydney Kane:

And I'm a soprano belt. So what do you— so obviously I'm freaking out. I call my ENT after I take a prednisone.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right.

Sydney Kane:

But no, I completely agree. I definitely think that it's a great marketing tool and that's it.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. You just have to see it as that.

Sydney Kane:

Yes.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. It's not your best friend and you can't take it personally.

Sydney Kane:

I stopped a long time ago.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, you can't, you can't. Well, let us get into the first story that you want to talk about. And this is BFA musical theatre programs. Now, you went to one yourself at Pace University, and you had great experiences there. You had some tough experiences there, but you tend to find them limiting in how people end up viewing the world of this industry performing.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So, what parts did you feel were either not there or discouraged or that you weren't feeling fully trained yet?

Sydney Kane:

I feel like type is such a conversation. Luckily, Pace was at the time and now, especially under Amanda Flynn, who's running the BFA program now, she's fantastic. At the time, though, Pace's whole thing was like misfit toys. We're not your cookie-cutter theater kids. You're not going to immediately look at me and be like, oh, that part. Or oh, this role, you know, like it was all of us kind of like, not interesting because like everyone, like there's interesting people who like go to Michigan and interesting people who go to like Boca or whatever. Like, that's not what I'm saying. I'm just saying like people who just take an extra second or a little bit more imagination to imagine them in something.

And like it— that— so that aspect of it was awesome. Like, I think that having a program that celebrates like diversity in that way was so great. But the problem was, is that like, it just like, was like, we're diverse, but then like had nothing really to like uphold that, like no like proper nourishment for that, you know, for like people of color, for people who, you know, have different backgrounds, like all the things. It was just kind of like, we all looked— we were different.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right. That's it.

Sydney Kane:

So for me, while that's a great headline, I think then it's like the foundation of that needs to also uphold what they want to sell or whatever, or what they're administering. But that being said, for me personally, now I'm not a person of color. I don't come from a background that is like some of my classmates. I came into this actually not really knowing much about theater really at all. I knew I loved theater, but as I said before, my work ethic was trash when I was a kid. It was trash. trash when I was in college as well. I just like didn't understand type.

Sydney Kane:

I didn't understand, um, and I wasn't ready to either. I wasn't ready to hear—

Patrick Oliver Jones:

not—

Sydney Kane:

that's, that's the wrong way to say it. So that I wasn't ready to hear feedback. It was just like the feedback I was getting was kind of like, so what are you telling me to do right now? Like, what do you mean? Like, I'm like— it was almost like a, like, you can sing this role, but I didn't like how little control I had. over the, quote, rules of everything. Like different songs I would sing, like I couldn't sing certain songs because it wasn't— not like, you know, I'm not going in there trying to sing like I'm Here from The Color Purple. I just mean like, you know, singing like something from like She Loves Me or like a soprano song. People would classify me as kind of like the soprano belt singing all like the character songs, which I love to do. But I also like really love singing ingenue stuff or singing, um, roles like that.

Sydney Kane:

Like, I love Cinderella. I love— I loved all of these things. Like, I, I just didn't understand why, like, I was being categorized in certain tropes in a, in a musical where, like, really what we should be doing is we should just be training and learning how to do those songs rather than being like, but you would never actually need that. It's like, well, how would you know?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

And so There were aspects where you would do that, but it just— it was kind of a very hypocritical experience being in a musical theater program. And I was very confused. And I still, as you can probably tell, haven't fully processed it in a way.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, the thing is, it's so confusing because casting directors are different. Because there are those offices that are very much about type. I remember whenever I was first in New York, I mean, I would be in those rooms where they bring in 10 people. Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no. And then the ones they said no to just leave. The ones they said yes actually got to audition. So I've been in that room, but then I've also been in the rooms where you just kind of walk in and they're like, well, you know, now that you've done that, what about this part? Why don't you try this scene?Let's do—you know, and then you're in those rooms where it's like an experiment almost.

Sydney Kane:

Which is like actually fine because it's like, that is kind of— now that you say that, I'm thinking like that is an experience that we did get at school. Like we got experiences where we felt very open to explore different roles and we got experiences where they would be like, no, yes, no, kind of what you just said. So in a way, that was great. However, I still think personally that flowers have to grow. You need to water them. I felt like certain people were watered and certain people were not watered. And I just think the line between an educational program versus a training program is very thin.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Mhm.

Sydney Kane:

And I felt like I was in a— training program that was disguised as an educational program because I didn't book any leads in the show. I would do, like, all— I got to do all the new musicals, which was really cool. Like, people would come in and we would workshop new stuff, which was a muscle that I was so grateful to get to, you know, work at.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

Because that's half of the job anyway, is doing new work, and I love new work. Um, but, you know, like, I do think that it's, like, such a thing. It's like either the same people get the same roles all the time in the, in the big shows that they do, or you actually give other people a chance. Um, and it might be the wrong choice, but I do believe if it's an educational program, you should be able to have a chance to learn how to do that because you learn by doing, especially in the arts.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, I'm not really in favor of those programs that differentiate between freshmen and seniors. It's like, well, the seniors have to get all the, all the stuff. The freshmen get to do the, the background, the stage management, the tech, and then a bit part.

Sydney Kane:

Right. I had that in high school. I was a sophomore And I played and I got a lead in the show. I actually can't say which one because it is actually problematic, unfortunately, and we've scrapped it from the internet. But we all had that.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Believe me, I was Pepe in West Side Story.

Sydney Kane:

So it's like West Side Story. I was great, but obviously not great. Not good. But I feel like it was kind of like one of those things where I was a sophomore and I got that part and like Obviously that caused a bit of ruckus. But then like in college, you know, and we had that too sometimes during college. But I don't know, I'm also not one to like harp on it because I'm just kind of like, my experience is my experience. It was weird. I feel like I wasn't very seen at my school. I think I was assumed. I felt like people just already assumed that they knew who I was. They assumed that I— and I got really anxious because of it. Like my anxiety got really bad during college.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Was that because of like, it felt like an expectation?

Sydney Kane:

It was just like, I feel like I need to be perfect and prove to all of you that I am good rather than I'm going to fail here and it's going to be fine and I'll get back up and I'll do it again. And granted, again, people did that and people were totally fine. People would mess up all the time. It was an ego thing for me that I wasn't ready to face, but I also didn't feel like I had— I didn't feel safe enough to experience it there personally. Not nothing that was unsafe, like for me personally that was happening. It was just like an inner, you know, feeling of like, oh, I like am looking for validation rather than like an education really is what it was. And, you know, it was just a hard dynamic to deal with. You know, you're with all these kids who were all trying to do the same thing, but we're all so different, but yet we're all competing against each other for some reason. And it just doesn't make any sense because like none of us would ever be you know, considered similar at all. We're all so different.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right.

Sydney Kane:

Um, yeah. And then I just— I mean, I do not subscribe to the path that is presented to a lot of kids at these programs that, like, you know, you showcase, you get an agent, you do this, this, this, this, and that, you get the headshots from this person, you do this, this, this, this, this, and that. It's like, that's one way to do it. But it's like presented almost as like not the only way, but just kind of like you're just not told about any other way to do it.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, yeah, because I don't know if you get this, but I know whenever I do a show, whenever I do talkbacks, whenever— especially when there's high school, college students there, one of the biggest questions they ask is, how did you get to the next step? What did you do? It's almost like they either don't know or they feel like the one way that they've been taught isn't working for them, so there must be another way.

Sydney Kane:

Did you, did you have that same experience as well? Like, were you—

Patrick Oliver Jones:

No, no, mine was, mine was definitely, even though it was more of a theater program than musical theater, but yeah, it was definitely like, we are, we are practicing, we are exploring, we're experimenting. So it definitely was not training me to be a professional actor. It was just training me to act and to utilize skills and craft. So it definitely wasn't thinking about type or anything in that way. So I felt like I came out of there, I got to do musicals, but then I also got to do straight plays that I'd never heard of before and aren't done.

Sydney Kane:

So it was a— Yeah, that's a really— I feel like I was in an industry and it was, it was an industry-based musical theater program.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Like, well, I mean, and being in New York, it's going to have that. It's just going to have that, which is great. Yes.

Sydney Kane:

But also, I was sent out really early for auditions. I was not ready. But I don't know. Like I said, my anxiety was so bad, crippling anxiety. I wouldn't be able to— and I turned to other things. I have OCD, so I turned to other things to try to control it. I got really into makeup. I was really into makeup in theater school. So like, basically, as long as I looked good, as long as like my face like looked really good, then like everything was totally fine, right? Um, and but of course, like, then it would be like I would focus too much on that, and then I wasn't focusing on what I was actually doing. But it was just because I needed to like control something because I felt so like lost. I was so lost.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Do you think there's something the program could have done to have helped you and, and others that go through anxiety and stuff like that? Is there something that, that they could have adjusted or a different way they could have taught that would have helped?

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, probably. I have no idea what the answer would be, but I mean, I think that some teachers did the best that they could, but I think that some teachers just saw it as like, okay, she's not ready yet, hmm, or something.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Or like— Which then doesn't help either, because then you're like, oh, I failed.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, but like, for me too, like, you know, I've been performing since I was 6. Like, I know that like if I get in there and I just like go and I do the scene up on its feet, and I do the scene and I listen to my teacher and I do what they're telling me to do, I'll get the job done. That's like how I— like, but I would never communicate. So it really was a me thing too. Like, I would never be like— I was scared because I like didn't want to be a baby or like seen as like I'm not ready. But it almost like had the same effect either way because it was like, well, Sydney doesn't talk when she gets up there. She just like does the thing and thinks it's fine. Um, and I like— because people can't read my mind either.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

For sure.

Sydney Kane:

However, I do think that there is some aspect of like if you— especially with acting teachers, like therapy, it is like the line between that and therapy are also really thin. Like, you need, in order to act and in order to like be there, you have to like feel safe and you have to, um, feel level-headed or learn how to separate the two. And I think that that line wasn't exactly respected very much, at least when I was there, because it just some people really struggle up there. It's really hard. You don't know what's going to come up when you're doing certain scenes or things. And so I think that probably something that could have been done better is maybe like we all should have taken like— maybe it's like couples counseling, but for school. Like, you know what I mean?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, yeah, I mean, because like, I mean, we did a little Meisner in school, but it really wasn't until that I took a little acting, you know, during 2020 when we're all doing acting classes on Zoom because that's I don't know, because that meant something. But—

Sydney Kane:

Yeah.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

But it was my first time to really dig into, what are you, Patrick, bringing to this role? Like, how are you showing up in this scene? How are you— and I was like, well, I'm just doing a character. It's like, well, no, who are you? What is it that you want? What's inside of you? How can you bring that out? How can you make this scene more grounded by bringing your own things? And I was like, oh. So then I was like, oh, I need to figure out myself first before I even figure out the character.

Sydney Kane:

How are you supposed to— like, they— yeah, totally. Sure, I think. But also, it's like, once I went to an acting class after college, and I remember— I, I don't take from her anymore, but she was great. She told us, like, the best way to step into a role is to just step into the world of the character, and then you can easily separate you From the character. That way you can fully step in rather than it bringing up anything unsafe or out of sorts.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Which is how I act. But there are people who go the opposite, and they—

Sydney Kane:

And I don't agree.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right. I suppose it works for some people. But for me, yeah, it's very much of like, I'm now in this world. What would I do in this world? Not what would Patrick do in this world, but what would this character do in the world?Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

I like that a lot more because then personally, I get more imagination. I can play more. Um, but you do have to have some level of, like, uh, secureness in who you are. Acting is a very embarrassing thing.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Absolutely.

Sydney Kane:

And I was so not secure at all in myself during that time. Uh, hence, like, I would put on makeup every day. I would go to, like, ballet, 8 AM ballet, full beat. What? Why? Like, why would I do that to myself? But it's just because it's so— it was just so like, I was not ready yet. I, and I, because I didn't get it. I was so like, why am I— why? Like, I was like, I was like, but why are we doing this like this? Like, why is it like this?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, yeah, I mean, so much about just being an actor itself is playacting the part of being an actor. Like, like, well, I need to look a certain way. I need to come into class a certain way.

Sydney Kane:

Animal work. I'm like, okay, I guess I'm a leopard today. What's that?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Don't even get me started on that. Oh my God.

Sydney Kane:

I just don't. I just don't know. I'm just like, I just don't know. And I— and that's why I'm a bad student. And that's why I like was bad at school. Like, because I just literally am like, is it— is this the only way to do this thing? I'm so confused. And I don't like it. Like, I, I just don't. I, I— yeah, I had no interest.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So once you left Pace, you know, once you got out of the program, you'd graduated, looking back on it now, if you could snap your finger and be like, I wish they did this, or I wish they added this to the program or didn't do this. Is there a way that you would like structure it differently if you could?

Sydney Kane:

Oh my God, I would have— I wish that they had people. I wish they would have more alumni come in, which they do now, which is really awesome. But I wish they would have more alumni come in and talk about their experiences after they graduated school. Not necessarily just like that they're working on Broadway, but everyone, like people who are working a day job, people who are, you know, just like kind of like living their life, people who got married, people who had kids, people who— just any, like, of every walk of life that happens after school, because it's not all going to be the same. And what happens is that, like, they say you showcase and you get an agent, and then you go audition, and then you book a regional theater for a couple years, and then you do a co-star on Law& Order, and then you get a Broadway contract. Like, you know, like, things like that. And I'm not saying it was, like, promised to us. Nothing's promised.

I'm just saying, like, there is this weird, like, headspace that you get in where it's like, well, if this is what it— this is, this is the way. Because like, we want structure. Like, it's really hard. That's like the first time really you're not dealing with structure anymore. Like, it's the first time you're like not— you're like, quote, an adult. But now that I'm thinking about it, I'm like, no, I was a child. Like, I think until last month I was like, I'm a child. But I—

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Mm-hmm.

Sydney Kane:

I think so. After when I graduated, I had an agent that I did not like, and I was— I had a couple auditions for like musicals or whatever. But then, you know, there's this like dark brooding, and I was working at Lululemon, and there was like a dark, like brooding, like thing in the back of my brain, which I'm not gonna say I knew it was gonna be COVID, but it was just something that was like, something is like not right and something's about to shift and I don't know what it is. And I think it was just me being like, I don't know what happens now in life. Like, I don't have a school to go to now. Uh, I have to make my own structure. Um, and it was kind of like— and then COVID hit literally 6 months later in March, and I'm like, okay, I guess I'm going home to Texas now.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

And so it just was this like weird feeling of like, okay, I guess we're all going here now. And auditions stopped and everything stopped, and I was just like, I don't know what I'm doing. And I started— my mom's like, well, you need to write something. And I've always wanted to write. things. And so my mom was like, what if you wrote a show for us to film at home during COVID And I was like, that's so stupid. Okay. So I wrote like a mockumentary for my family during COVID and we filmed it and posted it on Instagram.

And it was like, it was very silly. It was very fun. But there was something so fun to me about like getting to write that. And I edited it and I filmed it and I did all the things for it. And I kind of just like fell in love with doing that. But then of course, you know, you put it away. Yeah. Because it's like, well, that can't be it.

Sydney Kane:

That can't be the thing. I don't know what to do with that.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right. There has to be more to it.

Sydney Kane:

Right. Yeah. I'm like, and then I missed the boat of TikTok, that TikTok wave in 2020. I wasn't, I wasn't on that one. I started a little bit later and then I moved to LA for 2 years. I decided to go to LA like 8 months later because I was like, I could either go back to New York and do the thing or I can like go somewhere where I had some connections out here. and then figure it out. And so I did that and I hated it at first. I really liked it, but it was like peak COVID Los Angeles, which is a very different LA than it is now.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

I'm sure.

Sydney Kane:

And I just got involved with some strange people in the industry and I trusted a lot of people I shouldn't have and kind of went off— not off the rails, but I just got really depressed out here. Like, I lived alone for the first time ever. I broke up with my boyfriend a year before that and out here in LA because he followed me here. And I was like, I'm, I'm good. Like, I, I think, I think I need to just like be alone right now. And I was, and it was really hard. And I, and I was here living alone. And then I moved back to New York, um, under the guise of— I told my parents I was going to shoot a short film, and I wrote a short film to prove to my parents that I was going to go back to LA to do this.

Never shot it. I still have not shot it, but I moved back to New York. And then I kind of like started fresh again there. And then I was like, I don't know. I like was like, I know I don't want to be auditioning for musicals. Like, I don't want to do that. Like, I think there was a reason why they didn't know what to do with me there, because it's like I didn't even think that I knew what I wanted to do either. So that's why I don't inherently blame my program. I think I, I just wish that there was a little bit more guidance, not necessarily towards how you're going to succeed in the industry, but how I'm going to succeed as a person, as an artist.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, this gets us into story number 2. You wanted to talk about the authenticity and kind of navigating what that meant to be authentic in how you present yourself, how you present yourself as an actor. And you say that it kind of took you a while to learn how not to care what others were thinking and just tell the stories that matter to you, you know, the ones that you find enjoyable. So what exactly was it in this performing before that that felt so disingenuous or just didn't click with you?

Sydney Kane:

It was all of it. I think that's why I had so much anxiety, is that like I felt like I had to be this— like if I was not, if I didn't feel the prettiest I felt every single day in class, then like I wasn't gonna do good in school. Like, it was like this feeling of like, I have to be this version of myself all the time or else people are going to see me as a different person or whatever.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So, so even, even outside of the audition room, you kind of had to still be the same person?

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, I did feel like that. Yes, I felt, um, kind of like assumed and perceived by people as just like this like rich pretty girl. And like, I leaned into that in a way that felt so not authentic to who I am, but it made people like— it made people think that they could understand me. So I did that, and it was exhausting, and I felt constantly misunderstood by my peers.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Because in some ways it sounds like you were letting these outside things or this persona kind of define you so that you didn't really have to explain yourself. It's just like You present yourself and then people know.

Sydney Kane:

Yep.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Whereas, whereas actually there was more underneath, obviously.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, obviously. You know, it was like, but it was like a thing of like, I wanted to be seen as this version too, you know, because like growing up you get bullied and, you know, the classic stuff that happens to like a young girl. It's like you want to be like the— also Mean Girls was happening at the time too. So like, I really was like gunning for that. And I shat the bed during the audition. Like, I like completely like was not ready. I was so nervous. I wanted it so badly, but I was not ready.

I just— I did not know because I couldn't separate it. I couldn't— I couldn't separate the two. I was like, oh, I'm— I would like turn to roles as ways to identify myself with. But like, like on television too, like I got really into Sex and the City. So I was like, okay, how would Carrie Bradshaw operate in this moment? Like, like how would— I don't know if this is personality disorder, but like, this is like something like I think a lot of people have dealt with. It's like Mrs. Maisel came out at that time too, and that was something as like a Jewish girl who like loves comedy, watching that was like really formative for me.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

I like watched that show and I was like, oh my God, like I feel really seen right now actually, like authentically. And, um, that really helped kind of actually strip down a lot of the stuff I was covering myself up with and just be like, well, yeah, this. But then it got kind of a little bit too intense. I was like, I was like, well, I need a 1950s peacoat because that is what— like, that's what she's doing. But anyway, like, it would just, you know, like eras. It's like, it's like I'm in my Maisel era or like I'm in my Carrie Bradshaw era or like just things like that. Just trying to figure out who the fuck I was because I didn't know how to operate at all and still don't.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So was there like a breaking point? Was there this moment in which it all kind of came to a head for you?

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, it was COVID. It was like when you're home for that long and you're not like getting ready for anything and you're not like— I don't— I didn't need to present myself for anything because no one's leaving the house. It was like this really crazy moment of like, who am I without all the shit that I put on? Like, I don't know if I remember. It was really crazy. Like, I really went through a lot of— it took a long time. Like, I went through a lot of transformation and change during that. I think everyone did, but yeah, it definitely for me was like a moment where I was like, who am I actually and what do I actually want? And that's when I realized, I was like, I don't think I want to go back to New York right now. I'm gonna move to LA.

Um, because if there's one thing about me, it's I am impulsive. Um, and I did it, and I'm thankful I did it because I made great friends out here during this, which is interesting because there's this perception of LA being more superficial than New York.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Like, New York is You get down and dirty into the acting, whereas Ellie is all about being pretty.

Sydney Kane:

I know. Yeah. But then sometimes it's not. I don't know. I think it depends on— I've been talking about this a lot lately. I'm in my Saturn return right now. So I never thought I would want to move back here, but now I'm kind of like, maybe I do move back here. My team is out here now. I have friends out here now. My brother is here. And I think L.A. is a place where I love working here and I love living in New York. I don't like working in New York just because it's so hard to do what I want to do in New York. It's just hard. It's just New York is hard. L.A.

is hard. They're both really hard. But I do think that there's a form of like here in L.A. is where I made friends because I like I made genuine friendships here because I didn't know anyone coming here. And New York is where I went to college. So it's like I have these like friends that I spent a lot of time with in college and everything, and not saying they're any less of my friends, but it's just like we were all in one space for a very long period of time. And here, like, I've worked to like work on adult friendships, whereas like I love my friends out there, but it's like they're childhood friends really. It's how I feel. And I feel like here I kind of can step into my own as an artist a little bit more, um, without being defined as like Who I was in college or who I didn't know who I was in college.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, it's interesting that you bring that up because there's, there's certainly something great about having childhood friends and having them throughout your life. And then, yeah, years, decades later, you're still able to talk to them because they know you from such a young age. But at the same time, they carry all that stuff from the past. And if you're wanting to kind of either change that or leave it behind, newer friendships are a way to kind of start fresh again. And maybe be this new person that you want to be and actually explore that.

Sydney Kane:

Totally. But then it's always like, wherever you go, there you are kind of thing. So as someone who does love to run away, you always catch up with yourself.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, of course.

Sydney Kane:

Yes. But I completely agree with that. I'm sure— have you ever had experiences with that coming out of your program or anything? I guess it's hard because it's not in New York. You were in, um, yeah, I was in Alabama. Yeah, Alabama, pretty.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Which is, it's a great state, but it's a different mindset. It's a different— because acting is more like something fun that people do. It's not a career path per se.

Sydney Kane:

And it's also like the pressure of being in the city where it is is not really there. It's like, I get to go there when I'm ready, whereas like we're just there already. So it's just kind of like, we have to be ready right now. Like, if, if not now, never. And it's like, well, life is hopefully very long. And, like, there is time.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right.

Sydney Kane:

Again, like, this is just my own, like, my own anxiety when I'm going through it. Like, I just was always like, I don't know what I want to do, but I know it's not this, but I'm gonna stick with this because I don't know how to do anything else. Like, I don't know how to— math is obscene to me, and, uh, everything else doesn't make any sense to me. But I do know how to sing, I know how to act, and I know how to make people laugh. And I love doing that, but I can't even dance. I'm a mover. Like, I'm a mover first. And that was the whole thing too. I thought because I couldn't dance, I was not going to be successful.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

No, no, people think that, but my gosh, I mean, we're different types, and so we're going up for different roles. But no, you can totally have a career and not be, you know, a dancer, a triple threat.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, yeah. There's also more things to be a triple threat about as well. It's not just dancing. Yeah, it's like you can do other things too, but you don't get to know that because you're surrounded by like all comparison is inevitable at some point during college. And if you've never experienced comparing yourself to others in college, congratulations. I wish I had the mental state that you have.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

But comparison, it comes with us throughout our whole career. I mean, it's something that I had a little bit in college because that— because there was definitely this guy who was a fantastic actor. And I was like, I cannot do that. Like, I may have a better voice than him. Great, better singer. Yeah, his acting was just like I loved watching him. But yeah, I definitely found more comparison once I got to New York than probably anywhere.

Sydney Kane:

That's— so that's the thing is like, I have this whole theory where it's like here in LA, you're like alone a lot, but you don't feel lonely because you have to— you have to go places to see people. Like, but in New York, it's like, I— you're never alone, but I'm lonely because like, you know, you walk up and that's how I feel, I think. Yeah, I'll walk outside and there's activity and there's things going on, but like, I'm not really with anyone. But like, I live alone. But you're like, you know, you go on the subway, there's people there. But like, I like don't go do things with friends in New York. Like, and that's me personally. Like, when I'm in New York, I feel like I'm constantly like, I'm tired.

Sydney Kane:

I'm like home a lot.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Like, same, same.

Sydney Kane:

I'm just like tired. And then, but in LA, like, I don't know, there's like this weird feeling of like I'm gonna go about my day and then I'll come home. And right now I'm living with my brother in his basement right now. Um, and but then it's like there's— you go see people and like the work-life balance here is, uh, I don't know, I'm not saying it's any better. I just think it's a little bit different. And I think for what I want to do, it's, it's been easier to kind of like check in. Also the weather. I can't— I'm so happy I'm not in New York right now.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, yeah, with all that snow, it's definitely a 4-season—

Sydney Kane:

It's crazy. Yeah.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

that, that you have to go through it all. Yeah, it is interesting. Like, I've, I've never lived in LA for any length of time. I've only visited maybe a week, 2 weeks, whatever. But I will say that there is something about LA that when I'm there, it just makes me get out. It makes me go do something. It makes me go see something.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

I mean, granted, I'm visiting, so it is a bit of tourist kind of activities. But at the same time, like you, I have friends out there that are actors that are, you know, so I get to kind of what they're going through. And because I had to decide between LA and New York whenever I was, was first kind of ready to leave, because I went from Alabama basically to Disney World, was there for several years, and then I was ready to be like, then I was ready to be like, okay, now I'm gonna go. Now I'm gonna go out.

Sydney Kane:

What did you do at Disney World?

Patrick Oliver Jones:

I did several shows. I did Hunchback. I did Beauty and the Beast. I did all these different shows. But yeah, but then it was time to be an actor, be the real musical theater actor and not just theme parks. And yeah, so it was LA or New York, and New York was the musical theater, and LA doesn't have that as much. It's there, but it's just, that's just not their go-to.

Sydney Kane:

That's completely right.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. So, so for musical theater, New York was it. But every time I go to LA, there is definitely a, I don't know, there's a different energy, a different vibe there.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, I can't describe it either. And like, granted, like, I love New York. I am a New York girl. I think I just need I'm feeling more, um, grounded here right now than I am in New York, which is very new and very strange to me because I, I swore, I was like, I hate LA, I'm never coming back here. And then I get here and I do my show here and I'm kind of like, I have my managers now here and I'm just kind of like, this is actually really nice being like, like working here. So yeah, I feel like I'll be bicoastal for the future.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

For story number 3, let's talk more specifically about this one-woman show you've created called Wife Material. Now, this isn't some cabaret of various songs. No, you went above and beyond and created original songs for the show so that it could be a true and authentic representation of who you are, right?

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, I will say the one thing about finding authenticity. It was it was like really like stripping away like what I would put on rather than who I am. What really made me see that was like I started posting online and I was like, I went on a really bad date and I posted this video I thought was funny online and it like got a lot of good traction and I was like, oh, people like genuinely resonate with my stuff and I just kept doing it. I had no idea what I was doing and I tried a bunch of different ways to do things and like I met a really awesome person. His name's Matt Bushell. He's like a hilarious Instagram, TikTok, like, creator and a phenomenal writer and a very talented musician. And we would talk a lot and he would be like, just literally don't worry about what you're posting. Just post what you think is funny and it will happen.

I promise. You just have to keep doing it. And so I just did. I just kept doing it. And then I got offered a show at Green Room 42, you know, the solo show at Green Room 42, right? And so Ben called me and he was like, do you want to do one? And I was kind of like, I do, but I don't want to sing from my book. because I don't really care about roles that I want to play. But can I write— could I do like a variety type of show? Like, could I write my own comedy songs and do kind of my own thing and like write sketches and have friends in them? And he was like, yeah, that sounds amazing. I love that idea.

And I was like, great. I'm going to need a date that is so not in the foreseeable future. Maybe give me like 6 months and let's talk. So I got a date for April. Um, and, and I went to— his name is David Davenport. He's a, he's a phenomenal, uh, musician, arranger, uh, collaborator, like just a fantastic person, orchestrator. And he actually met me in high school when I was nominated for the Dallas Summer High School Musical Awards as Rosemary Pilkington in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying, which was my senior year show. And so he came in and he did all the arrangements, you know, like the best actors medley. It's so nice being on a theater podcast because I can say these things and you know what I'm talking about.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right.

Sydney Kane:

I've done a lot of comedy podcasts that's like, what's the jimmies? And I'm like, don't worry about it. And so, um, I didn't win because I'm Rosemary Pilkington. And but the arrangement though, he gave me like 3 opt-ups and I was like, how did you— what, what did you— he was like, he was like, well, I found a video of you on YouTube singing and I, you know, wanted to— I heard that you, you belt and Rosemary doesn't do anything. So he was like, so I wanted to give you like a couple moments. And since then 10 years ago. I swear to God, I have not let this man out of my life. In fact, he has become a mentor to me, and I knew I've always wanted to work with him, but I've never been as— I've never been truly authentic enough in myself for us to do any really good work together. And so I asked him, I was like, will you do this with me finally? And he was like, yes. Not being like I would ask him, I would ask him and he'd be like, you're not authentic. It's just like The vibe was like he knew I wasn't ready to do something.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

And I was like, I want to do this thing. I want to— I will only do it with you. When are you available? And then literally a year ago, I presented him with a PowerPoint of my show with all of the song ideas I had, with all of the sketch ideas I had, and like the overall structure of this cabaret variety show. And he was immediately obsessed. And I came to him, he was like, okay, so you have until March 9th to write all these songs and give them to me, and we'll figure it out. And I was like, okay, great.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Now, did he help you write the music?

Sydney Kane:

Um, yeah, well, he arranged all of the music, and, um, we wrote one song together, and it's the last song of the show, and it's my child. And, uh, one thing about that's awesome in New York is that, you know, so many talented musicians, like, and they're ready to write something, play an instrument, and they're ready to write something. So I went to every single person I know that plays an instrument. I said, I have a show coming up, do you want to write a song? I have a show coming up, do you want to write a song? Um, and I wrote 7 songs in 3 weeks, and they are bangers, and I love them, and they are the only thing that's remained consistent in the show every time I do it, is the songs.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Now, why did you want to write original songs? I mean, there's thousands, tens of thousands of songs out there in the world of musical theater and pop songs.

Sydney Kane:

Totally.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah. So why original?

Sydney Kane:

You know, it's like that thing where Remember when I said I wanted to be a pop star at one point, like, when I was little? I did. I went to a studio and I wrote music and I wrote songs when I was 11, and I loved writing lyrics, like, and I always have loved writing lyrics. Even in school, like, um, uh, we— Ryan Scott Oliver taught a musical theater writing class and I took it, and I was, I was obsessed with writing lyrics. I just love them. I love music and I love lyrics a lot. At the time, I was also really inspired just by, like, pop girlies were coming back, you know, it was like We had Chapel Round, Charli, that whole Brat Summer era, right? Like Sabrina, Charli, Chapel, or whatever.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

Um, I love all of them. And, but I also love, like, Lady Gaga. And, like, so all these people, I, like, I feel like I had such a long time to, like, absorb so much inspiration. And, um, it kind of just, like, all came out of me. I was like, I know I want to write this song with— in this style, this song in this style. Like, this is what I have to say about this thing. It just, it all just, like, really came out really fast. And none of it felt sticky or hard.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

And we did it and it was like we did it in New York and the show happened in April and I've never been more stressed out in my life, but I did it. And it was kind of like, you know, I had a couple of moments where I did jokes and I had a couple of moments where I had friends in sketches and I wrote all of them and we rehearsed it. And it was just like this thing where friends who I went to college with and my family and people that just have known me for so long got to come. I'm going to get emotional. And they got to come to the show and they kind of, I think, saw like, oh, okay, like, this is it. Like, this is like, she's meant to like write and create. And not that I can't act or do other people's things, like, I love doing it, but it was like, I do think that this is my calling card. Like, I really have never worked harder in my life.

And also the show has changed every time I've done it, uh, just because we've learned, like, we're learning. I'm learning as I'm doing. I'm not a comedian. Like, I mean, I'm starting to become one, just based on like the content that I post online and like performing more and getting more comfortable talking to audiences and writing jokes and everything.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, you may not be a comedian, but just in the talking to you that I've done so far, you definitely have a lens of just like there's a little bit of snark, but there's also personal, there's also real, but there's also just a little bit of like edge to it. And so I mean—

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, I'm extremely crazy.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, yeah. So I, I definitely catch that your vibe is already just on a different plane than just like the serious I'm going to now do this acting beat.

Sydney Kane:

I can't. I can't be like that. I really try. And then I listen to myself and I want to throw up because I'm like, you're not being you. You are such a— I'm not a cynic. I'm really quick and I've been told I have wit.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right, exactly.

Sydney Kane:

But I laugh a lot and I like laughing and I like finding funny in absolutely everything, which isn't always good. But that being said, that show, I was in a toxic situationship and it ended in July and then Like last July. So I restructured the show kind of like, you know, because I had nothing left to lose. He was at the first 2 performances of the show, but then when he left, I was like, if I was being pointed before, I'm gonna like get a knife and like stab.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Hey, it's what Taylor Swift does. She has a relationship, breaks up, writes a song.

Sydney Kane:

I mean, it, it definitely— because, because for a while, like, I would define myself In finding who I am, I would really try to find validation from others and try to be what other people wanted. And that's kind of what the whole show is about. It's really about me just trying to be what people want, but people don't know what they want. So then it's like, I don't know who I am. It's not only with men that I've been like this or with women. It's really just like in my life, I'm just this person who just wants to be loved for who I am. But never being comfortable with who I am. So I try to be what they want me to be. But then it's like, well, you're not who I met before now. So who are you now? Like, I don't know this person. It's like, I don't either.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So then was it tough to write material if you're still trying to kind of figure yourself out?

Sydney Kane:

I think the reason why it's working is because— so this last go-round of it in February, I've now had about— I think with this year of writing the show, even like February to February, like that in itself has already been such a journey for me, like trying to figure out who I am outside of relationships because I had no choice but to be alone and write this thing.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah. And I had nothing else going on. I only had this happening and I had no choice but to sit with myself and be like, what am I actually trying to say here? What am I actually trying to do here? And Will people like it? And it's turned out that, like, after the first couple times when you do it and people resonate with it, that's when you kind of get a confidence level of being like, oh, I, like, know what I'm doing. I know who I am.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, but, but also, like, what you have to say matters and, and means something to people.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, yeah. And it— after such a long time of being like, oh, the right or wrong thing, or booking this job or that job, or doing this thing or this thing, it's like, I actually don't give a fuck. what you think of me. I'm just going to do it like I don't care. And that's when I started getting what I wanted, like, and doing what I wanted to. Like, it just happened. It just all happened. It's happening very fast and it's— I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. But it's just a level of secureness now that I have in my ability to tell a story and to write that I It's so freeing. It feels light. And I mean, it's hard, but it feels definitely very light.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

And do you have a hard time balancing between— obviously, this material is now very personal to you, both in the songs you write and how you connect the scenes and everything. How do you balance being vulnerable, but then also keeping yourself protected so you're not just crying on stage every night?

Sydney Kane:

We're working on it. We are working on it. From the 3rd time I did it to the 4th and 5th at Littlefield in Brooklyn, uh, that like 3-month period where I was rewriting it to try and make it a one-woman show, that was like the hardest, uh, process ever because it was just like me being like, not only do I now have to fix the story so it makes sense, it's also like I have to do this alone now. It's a one-person show where I puppet a mannequin. And so I'm learning how to, like, and, like, speak for the mannequin and speak for me and then do all these songs and everything. It was hard and I didn't think I could do it and I didn't want to do it. It was like I was falling back into that thing of being like, I don't want to rehearse, I don't want to do this. Like, I'm dreading every moment.

But then when I performed it again for my friends, it was just kind of this like— it was a mess, but it was like love. It was the support and love I had in that room. was awesome and the show went great. And then we did it at Sketchfest in January and it again, that I was just, I really was going through it. Like, I really was like, I don't know. And I just kind of like, I don't know what clicked, but something just clicked where I was just like, you know, I think it's because I left New York. I like needed to like leave home and be somewhere else and be doing my job where I was like, this is what I'm doing right now. This is my job.

I cannot continue going about it in this way of like dreading rehearsing it every time, or else like the show won't go well. I need to be working at it. Like, this is my— it is work. And when I started viewing it like that, it just clicked. I don't know, rehearsals got easier because I knew what I wanted. I was trying to simplify rather than like walk back away, trusting my own voice more. Yeah. And then in February, like Everything felt correct. Like everything. It felt like the story works. Everything works. Now we just need to finesse and punch up some comedic beats. And but the ending I've never felt more confident in. I got ghosted the day of the show anyway.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Oh really, like, for a date?

Sydney Kane:

yeah, from someone was supposed to come and they didn't come. And then I haven't really heard from them since, which I think is hilarious. But perfect. It We think there's like a curse with my show. Like, something happens every time right before my show. Like, and I'm just kind of like, it does not end. But this is what I'm doing, and people really like it, and it feels really good to know that. It's super scary, but it's also like, it just, it doesn't feel— I, uh, it only feels hard when I make it hard on myself, if that makes any sense. Like, other than that, like, it is— I, I, I'm not saying it's effortless, but like, I do find it to be like one of the most amazing parts of my life has been this whole year and this whole show.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

And so what is it like with— you've mentioned, you know, obviously having friends and family because they come and they know you, they're supporting you. But what about strangers coming to see it that don't know you, that are seeing this for the first time? How have those audience reactions been?

Sydney Kane:

Great. Definitely, like, great. Like, I've had people come up to me that are like, I followed you on Instagram. Like, I was in a really bad situation and I followed your videos. It's so cool to see, like, like, I, I— this is so relatable. And I'm like, great, tell your friends, please tell your friends about it.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Always the marketer. Oh yeah, yes, yeah.

Sydney Kane:

I'm like, tell your friends about it because the one thing about producing is like tickets. Holy shit, is it hard to sell tickets, um, especially in LA, especially like to get people to drive an hour to see you. Sure, even the people that did come, like, everyone loved it. I think people take a second to like understand, like, what's going on. Because I come out and I'm like, it's like I look this way and then, like, I open my mouth and I start just, like, saying shit that you would not even— but, like, it's just like, what? What is this? Like, it's like a— not a paradox, but, like, just such, like, a— like, she looks— she's dressed like this, like, housewife, but then she's saying, like, stuff about, like, sex and shit, you know what I mean? It's just like they're not fitting. But I love that. I feel like it's, um— It's really just me. Like, the show is just me, actually.

Sydney Kane:

Like, a guy did come see the show that he asked me out later, and I have been seeing him while I've been here. And but no, and but like, it's weird because it's like, watch this, it'll air, and I've never spoken to him since. But like, it's like one of those things where it's like, I, uh, he came to see my show and like, I don't feel like I have to really explain much because like, he saw the show and I'm kind of like, that is like quite literally who I am.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

So if this is what you want to go out with, okay.

Sydney Kane:

It's like, yeah, exactly. I'm like, that's I was really very much being like, all of me is on that show. So if you, if you like that, that's, that's what you're going to get. Like, yeah. So it's that, that authenticity, I think, was a hard thing to learn. But once you like tap into that and just trust your gut a lot and like someone told me the other day, actually, I think it's the guy I just told you about. He said, like, I forgot who said it, but like the truth. like when it comes out, it just like, it comes out so fast because you don't have to think about it.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah.

Sydney Kane:

And so not always that like your first thing that you write down is like the best thing, but like the most authentic thing that you have to say.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

And so as, as you're talking about this, I mean, I love the artistic craft of it. And you're working, you're finding something that resonates with you. But in practical terms, we still have to make money, we still have to have a living. How have you made a living either from acting or are you having to supplement with other ways?

Sydney Kane:

I am having to supplement with, um, other ways. I, I saved money from working, but if I'm being completely transparent and honest, like, my parents have been helping me a lot. Um, uh, some, you know, content stuff gets me some money, but definitely not enough. But my, like, my, my parents have been, like, the most supportive. If I'm being so transparent, like, that's what it's been. But it's been hard because I'm just kind of like, they gave me not a time limit, but they were like, if you're gonna do this, do this. And I've been like, been like, okay, I have this amount of time to like do this thing. Let's see what happens.

Because then after that, it's like, if it doesn't work, then we gotta figure it out. I like, I save money. Like, I was a personal assistant, like when I was out here, I was a nanny, like teaching, coaching, you know, different things like that along the way. You know, I did like all those things, but, um, I definitely definitely, definitely need like a job when I get out here to LA though. Like, I can't.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

But at the same time, I assume through this, I mean, I guess you're hoping to make this into a career, to make this your moneymaker. Are you trying to figure that out? How this either writing, either one-woman show, either like how this can be your income?

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, I would love that. Obviously, I would love that. Like, if we're working on finding investors and, and finding like, you know, commercial aspects for all of it. I just signed with new managers from this too, and like hopefully that'll lead to some great jobs that can help me. Um, also working on my content so that I can make that my income. It, it— that's what I would love for it to be, is for it to pay my bills.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Do you think that you have left behind that world that a lot of us are in? Because I'm, I'm certainly in it, where we're auditioning, we're doing that, We're going to stuff that's already there rather than doing your own stuff? Or do you see you balancing both? What do you think is coming?

Sydney Kane:

I see myself balancing both for sure. But I think that creating your own work is imperative now. And that's where the industry is leading. Because also the shows where you're looking for roles for you, what I'm finding is that people are really using their friends. So it's like, my thing is like, go to your friends, like make things with the people you love and want to work with. Like, don't just wait. Do not just wait. I mean, I think do both at the same time.

Like, I've been auditioning and doing my show, but like, do something that's yours because that's like, then it's your thing. Whether that means like you're getting together with a group of friends and you're just like reading plays or showing some— a poem you wrote or something like that. Like, you don't— like, if that's what you want to do, like, you have to just do it. Like, people do not like me because I'm always like, always like, yeah, but like, you got to do your own stuff. Like, you got to make it happen. Like, no one's gonna make it happen for you. Like, you have to make it happen. I was also told that.

Sydney Kane:

Like, I was told in college literally that like people are not going to know what to do with me. So like, I need to know what to do with myself, which I also don't know if that's true, but that is what I was told.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Well, I mean, I mean, again, you and I are are in different boats. Whereas I've had more like the leading man track. And when you're a leading man, or seen that way, then you kind of have this, well, these are the parts you do, this is the kind of singing you do, this is— so I, it's kind of felt like I had a type, and I've stuck with that. But it's interesting, as I've gotten older, that leading man has gone away. And I'm more either the supporting character who's maybe the villain, or maybe I'm the comedy guy who's was like, this tall, lanky guy, what's he doing? So I mean, I found different ways to enjoy it. And doing the character work has been a lot of fun.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

You know?

Sydney Kane:

Yeah, it's very fun. Yeah. Oh my God. It's so fun to do that. I love character stuff.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Yeah, because people look at me and like on stage, they don't see it happening. But then all of a sudden I come out with this like silly move or, you know, just lines or something the way that I say something. And it's like, yeah, I like that reaction.

Sydney Kane:

Yeah. Yeah. It's making— listen, making people laugh is like the most rewarding thing for me in any situation. Like a podcast, you, when you've laughed, I'm like, ugh, I can live happy. Like it's, I love making people laugh. It's my favorite. I love to disarm people. I like to make people find humor in things. Like it's, it's also like a comfort thing. 'Cause I'm like, isn't this thing funny? Please also laugh at this thing that I'm laughing at.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Please.

Sydney Kane:

Right, right. Everyone just takes themselves too seriously, I think. But I, I, I do find it— that's good. That means you have range. That means that you can do a lot more things than just one thing.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Which, which is what I've known since I was 20. I could do it all. I could do everything.

Sydney Kane:

You can. You literally can.

Patrick Oliver Jones:

Right?

Sydney Kane:

It is so true. It is not too good to be true. It's just true. And you don't— your people aren't just doing it. Like, that's not easy. It's literally the hardest thing I've had to do. Granted, like, I have amazing support. I have an— I have a foolproof support system also. Like, I just— but there's a lot of trust that happens with that. And it's like, I'm not just like, you know, my parents aren't just like covering for me. Like, I'm like, really, I've never worked harder. And I'm just lucky that, like, you know, I can get rent paid and like have my rent help to get paid. But like, it's been really hard and isolating. And with that being said, Dan Levy posted this video actually around the same time I started writing my show. He's writing, I think, I forget the name of the show that's coming out that he's doing. I believe it's with Rachel Sennott.

But he said something like, today I'm having a really, like, horrible day. Like, writing and creating is so hard. And I don't remember the whole gist of it or whatever, but he's just like, yeah. And it's like just one of those things like, I want to like quit, like, or something like that. And then a year ago he posted a video being like, so a year ago I posted this video, whatever, whatever. I really didn't know what was going to happen after that. And my show comes out next month or something. He's like, now granted, he is Dan Levy and he had Schitt's Creek and all that.

stuff. But it is just inspiring because it's literally like, you don't know what a year holds for you. And for me, seeing that, I'm like, yeah, like, if you would have told me that me performing at Green Room 42 would have then resulted in me, like, doing my show, like, 7 more times, signing with new management, and finally having, like, auditions and things to do towards my career, and having people that, like, see me as all of me and and, and wanting to help me now, like, I would tell you you're insane. I would be like, there's no way I worked that hard. Like, there's no way. But I did. And it's happening and it's— I'm proud of myself, but it's so hard. But it's like you just have to not give up and you have to just keep going.

It's so much more fun to like to just like do the thing. But I'm telling you, like, what I've learned the most is like Community is like the only way that you're gonna get any sort of like fulfillment. For me, like having people that you love, that you wanna work with, or that you can lean on to help. Like, I think that that's so important. No one does this alone. Yeah, they just don't.